I needed a lazy day today. It’s been a long and stressful week, and some days you just need a day to be lazy. Today is the day. I probably wouldn’t even be awake right now, if someone had not called me on the phone. Now that I am awake though, it is a beautiful day outside, and I am going to enjoy it the best I can.
What are you doing this Sunday?
I’d love to have laid in bed all day today with a good book, and if someone happened to be lying beside me while I read, all the better. However, instead, I have been running around helping family members with a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Sometimes, there is no rest for the weary. What would have been your ideal day today?
Huck Finn has never been hotter. More seriously, we can learn a lot from the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain. Even though the book is sometimes (and in my opinion, stupidly) considered controversial because of its use of the “N” word. The words used in this book are based on historical accuracy of the time, and when the book is taught that should be something that is explained. Twain was a very open and non-prejudiced. He often showed just how ignorant hate-filled language and derogatory terms can be. Controversy aside, we can still learn some valuable lessons in the book. The developing friendship between a white boy (Huck) and a black slave (Jim) is the main driving force of this novel. It is this friendship that makes Huck’s decision of whether to help Jim escape slavery so difficult. Huck’s ultimate choice pits him against everything he had previously known to be right. Huck makes several comments throughout the book that let us know how seriously he takes his friendships. He values loyalty most highly, and that leads him to stick with Jim (who proves his loyalty to Huck several times) to the end.
If we could all apply this lesson to our own lives, just think how much happier we could be.
First of all, I am not condoning or condemning the use of marijuana, however, I heard about this on NPR the other day, and found the whole thing fascinating. The Chu Valley between Kyrgyzstan and Kazkhstan is the home to an extremely hardy type of marijuana that resisted Soviet-era efforts to stamp it out. Law-breaking marijuana farmers in the region harvest the crop normally, but they also procure their stick-icky using a tried and true method that’s been around for centuries: nude equestrianism.
Every August, naked horseback riders descend on the Chu to gather resin for a highly concentrated form of smokeable marijuana known as “plastilin.” Plastilin is so potent that a few pieces the size of pinheads will get the user proper goofy. Explains Radio Free Europe:
It begins with a freshly showered person riding naked for hours on a clean, washed horse inside a two-meter-high “forest” of marijuana.
Afterwards, the human body and that of the horse are covered with a thick layer of resin mixed with sweat.
This produces a substance that is usually dark brown in color, which is then thoroughly scraped off the human and horse’s bodies […] But it is a lot harder to produce this form of the drug because you need more time to make it.
Imagine 10, 20, or 30 individuals running or riding naked in a field of wild marijuana. It goes without saying that they are more exposed and it is easier to catch them. Nonetheless, people do it and they have been doing it since time immemorial.
The substance produced and scraped from the penis could give a whole new meaning to the euphemism “smoking the pole.” Just a thought…
Source: io9.
Do you ever get the urge to just run away? I’m sure I am not alone in this feeling from time to time. When things just begin to pile up on you; everyone seems to be pulling you in a different direction; you have a ton of things to do, that all needed to be done yesterday; and you just wish there were four or five of you to get it all finished. I have been having that feeling for the last few weeks, but I hope things are starting to settle down. However, on the nights when I teach my college class, I pass the airport on my way home. I seem to always be passing by when the last plane of the night is landing. It’s a regional airport, and I have been on that last flight into the airport several times. Seeing that plane in the air, flying over, always gives me the urge to run away. I always want to be on one of those planes that are leaving. It doesn’t matter where (though Italy would be nice), just to go somewhere and put the worries of life behind me for a few days. It’s actually a very odd feeling for me, to want to fly somewhere that is, because I am terrified of flying. Anytime I fly, I have to take Xanax just to keep from having a panic attack. Yet, I still wish I were in one of those planes.
When the stresses of life seem to be at their breaking point for you, what do you wish you could do? And if you did run away, where would you go?
Yesterday on Tuner Classic Movies’s Summer of the Stars, Cary Grant was the feature star. I love Cary Grant. In my opinion, there has never been, before or since, an actor as handsome and with such charisma as Cary Grant. In honor of Grant, I wanted to write a post about him.
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| A master of the screwball comedy. |
Archibald Alexander Leach, better known by his stage name Cary Grant. With his distinctive mid-Atlantic accent, he was noted as perhaps the foremost exemplar of the debonair leading man, not only handsome, but also witty and charming. He was named the second Greatest Male Star of All Time by the American Film Institute. Grant starred in some of the classic screwball comedies. His popular classic films include The Awful Truth
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| With Rosalind Russell in His Girl Friday |
At the 42nd Academy Awards the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences honored him with an Honorary Award “for his unique mastery of the art of screen acting with the respect and affection of his colleagues”.
Cary Grant embodied the elegance, charm, and sophistication of Hollywood in its golden years. His good looks, charisma, and ambiguous sexuality enchanted women and men alike. As the star-struck comedian Steve Lawrence once said, “When Cary Grant walked into a room, not only did the women primp, the men straightened their ties.”
Grant was married five times. He wed Virginia Cherrill on February 10, 1934. She divorced him on March 26, 1935, following charges that Grant had hit her. In 1942 he married Barbara Hutton, one of the wealthiest women in the world, and became a father figure to her son, Lance Reventlow. The couple was derisively nicknamed “Cash and Cary”, although in an extensive prenuptial agreement Grant refused any financial settlement in the event of a divorce. After divorcing in 1945, they remained lifelong friends. Grant always bristled at the accusation that he married for money: “I may not have married for very sound reasons, but money was never one of them.”
On December 25, 1949, Grant married Betsy Drake. He appeared with her in two films. This would prove to be his longest marriage, ending on August 14, 1962. Drake introduced Grant to LSD, and in the early 1960s he related how treatment with the hallucinogenic drug—legal at the time—at a prestigious California clinic had finally brought him inner peace after yoga, hypnotism, and mysticism had proved ineffective. (In 1932, Grant had also met the Indian spiritual teacher Meher Baba.) Grant and Drake divorced in 1962.
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| Grant and Cannon |
He eloped with Dyan Cannon on July 22, 1965 in Las Vegas. Their daughter, Jennifer Grant, was born prematurely on February 26, 1966. He frequently called her his “best production” and regretted that he had not had children sooner. The marriage was troubled from the beginning and Cannon left him in December 1966, claiming that Grant flew into frequent rages and spanked her when she “disobeyed” him. The divorce, finalized in 1968, was bitter and public, and custody fights over their daughter went on for nearly ten years.
On April 11, 1981, Grant married long-time companion Barbara Harris, a British hotel public relations agent, who was 47 years his junior. They renewed their vows on their fifth wedding anniversary. Fifteen years after Grant’s death, Harris married former Kansas Jayhawks All-American quarterback David Jaynes in 2001.
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| With Randolph Scott |
Some, including Hedda Hopper and screenwriter Arthur Laurents have said, that Grant was bisexual, the latter writing that Grant “told me he threw pebbles at my window one night but was luckless”. Grant allegedly was involved with costume designer Orry-Kelly when he first moved to Manhattan, and lived with Randolph Scott off and on for twelve years. Richard Blackwell wrote that Grant and Scott were “deeply, madly in love”, and alleged eyewitness accounts of their physical affection have been published. Alexander D’Arcy, who appeared with Grant in The Awful Truth
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| Grant and Scott |
Barbara, Grant’s widow, has disputed that there was a relationship with Scott. When Chevy Chase joked about Grant being gay in a television interview Grant sued him for slander; they settled out of court. However, Grant did admit in an interview that his first two wives had accused him of being homosexual. Betsy Drake commented: “Why would I believe that Cary was homosexual when we were busy fucking?”
In 1932 he met fellow actor Randolph Scott on set, and the two shared a rented beach house (known as ‘Bachelor Hall’) on and off for twelve years. Rumours ran rampant at the time that Grant and Scott were lovers. From 1933 onwards, Cary Grant occasionally shared a house with Randolph Scott. There were many rumors about their relationship. Scott often referred to himself, jokingly, as Grant’s wife. Many studio heads threatened not to employ them unless they lived separately.
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| Grant and Scott |
In their biographies of Grant, Marc Eliot, Charles Higham and Roy Moseley contend that Grant was bisexual. Higham and Moseley claim that Grant and Scott were seen kissing in a public car park outside a social function both attended in the 1960s. In his book, Hollywood Gays, Boze Hadleigh cites an interview with homosexual director George Cukor, who commented on the alleged homosexual relationship between Scott and Grant: “Oh, Cary won’t talk about it. At most, he’ll say they did some wonderful pictures together. But Randolph will admit it—to a friend.” (It should be noted that there is substantial disagreement as to the veracity of Hadleigh’s works.) It has even been suggested that Grant and Scott were married in a secret ceremony in Mexico. Randolph Scott’s son Christopher refuted these rumors. Following the death of his father in 1987, Christopher wrote a book, Whatever Happened to Randolph Scott?
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| Grant and Scott |
According to screenwriter Arthur Laurents, Grant was “at best bisexual”. William J. Mann’s book Behind the Screen: How Gays and Lesbians Shaped Hollywood, 1910-1969
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| Grant and Scott |
Whether Cary Grant was heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual doesn’t really matter to me, he was a great actor. His former wife, Dyan Cannon was thrust into the Hollywood celebrity whirlpool in 1965 when, at 28, she married superstar Cary Grant who was 35 years her senior. It was Cannon’s first marriage and Grant’s fourth. She has always been adamant when asked about Grant’s sexuality saying “I can tell you there isn’t an iota of truth to those ugly rumors. They would never have written that drivel when Cary was alive. He’d have sued the pants off those cowards. Cary can’t defend himself from the grave but I will go to mine insisting he was every ounce a straight man.”
I have to admit something to you guys, I have been pretty damn lazy today. It’s been a long tiring week of getting back into the schedule of things with school starting back, and since I was not able to sleep in on Saturday, I have used today to catch up on my sleep. So I am just now waking up. I know there are people out there, who have natural alarm clocks and wake up at a certain time each day, generally go to bed at a certain time each night, but I have never been one of those people. Part of it is because I have always found it hard to fall asleep at night, then when I do, I find it difficult to wake in the morning. Today, I really had nothing to do, not that couldn’t wait until the afternoon, so I slept in.
Considering my own laziness today, I wanted to ask my fellow educators out there how they deal with lazy students. I think that part of this has to do with the lack of manners and courteousness that I spoke of on Friday, but I have noticed in the first week of school that no matter what I try to do, my students begin to complain as soon as I give them an assignment. I try to make my classes fun and interesting, and I rarely give “busy work” just so they will have something to do. I find it particularly vexing with my 12th grade class. Senioritis shouldn’t start until later in the year, but these kids have caught it way too early. By the way, for those who don’t know what I mean by Senioritis, Urban Dicitonary describes it as thus:
Senioritis: noun. A crippling disease that strikes high school seniors. Symptoms include: laziness, an over-excessive wearing of track pants, old athletic shirts, sweatpants, athletic shorts, and sweatshirts. Also features a lack of studying, repeated absences, and a generally dismissive attitude. The only known cure is a phenomenon known as Graduation.
Though most of it is very accurate, especially for Urban Dictionary, I hope that the only cure is not ” a phenomenon known as Graduation.” If that is the only cure, I am afraid that some of these kids will not graduate. They have required classes that they must pass this year, and even those they do not want to take seriously. I hope this will change soon, but I would love to hear your advice, dear reader, on what I can do. TIME Magazine published an article titled “How to Combat Senioritis” in May 2006, but this article did not seem particularly helpful. Kevin Quinn, a counselor at South Kingstown High School said, “Seniors need something to gravitate to and be re-energized by.” So South Kingston High School began offering dual college enrollment. My students are far too lazy at this point for dual enrollment with a college. At least one last year during his senior year took some online courses with a state university, but I do not think that he is doing so this year. In this same article, TIME Magazine wrote: “The best cure for some cases of senioritis is a strong dose of reality. More than 50% of students entering college in the U.S. require remedial course work once on campus.” The problem with this is that my students do not care about reality. Most of them are quite spoiled rich kids (I teach at a private school), and they firmly believe that their parents’ money can literally buy them an education whether they do the work or not. I have tried to explain to them the reality of this, and the reality of not going to college for the few who do not plan on furthering their education, but they are too stubborn to see reality.
So, what have you done to combat Senioritis? How have you found the most effective way to motivate your students? My past techniques of making class more interesting and interactive, do not seem to be working this semester, so I would love to hear any suggestions from my readers.
One of the things about blogs is that they allow comments. I love comments, as it lets me know my readers better. However, blogs occasionally get angry people who leave comments. Sometimes, they leave those comments anonymously, sometimes not. I rarely get negative comments, but I do on occasion. They always make me think about what I have written, and whether or not I could have written it better, but often I have found that people will nitpick about little things and more often than not take a statement completely out of context. It is when these comments twist my words to mean something that they were never my intent that generally makes me a little angry. I know that it should not bother me, but….
Nearly all blogs get negative comments at some point or another. What I do not understand is why people cannot be civil with their comments. Were they never taught manners? Or, do they just not care? And this is not a phenomenon with just blogs, where people can be anonymous through the technology of the internet. I have come to realize that some people just seem to be angry at the world and take that anger out on whoever they can. These angry people should realize that striking out with their anger is not productive. Disagreements and debates are healthy for all of us to see different views, but does someone have to be so vitriolic in their criticisms? Why can’t a simple I disagree and this is why I disagree not be sufficient? Instead, these people often attack and attempt to make their attack personal. A good example of this comes from a recent blog post “What Is Your Christianity Used to Justify?” on the blog for Believe Out Loud. I have noticed that many of the more harsh criticisms come from people who comment on my posts about Christianity/Religion and those about my opinions of Queer Theory. I have my opinions, and this blog is a place for me to write about them. I always welcome comments, but why are people not able to give their opinions in opposition without turning to attacks?
It’s not just on blogs that these kinds of things happen People in everyday life are getting ruder. I was raised to be a good Southerner (at least that is what my mother wanted); good manners were taught and reinforced in my early life and have continued to be a part of who I am. Even the simplest things such as opening and holding the door for someone can make the difference in someone’s day. It only takes a few more seconds to do so, but so many people will almost purposefully shut the door in your face instead of holding the door for you. I have seen people speed up their walking just so that they can step in front of you in line. The other day, I was sitting waiting for someone to pull out of a parking space, when someone actually drove around me, blocked my way and took that parking space.
I also see it more and more with students. They have a distinct lack of courtesy when speaking to people in authority. They are often rude and think it is cute and funny. I find nothing cute or funny about being rude. I have one student, whose family is fairly wealthy, and she is one of the meanest people I have ever met. She is the epitome of a “mean girl.” Such people are so inconsiderate of those around them, that they actually think that the world revolves around them alone. With my students, they will one day have a rude awakening. They will find that manners really do matter, and that simple, random acts of kindness can go a long way.
I have often talked on this blog about the Golden Rule: treat others as you want to be treated. For me, this is not a hard concept. The nice guy may not always finish first, but I urge all of us, including myself, to work harder each and every day to think of those around you and with whom you interact. The simplest acts of kindness can make someone’s day. It shouldn’t be that difficult to give someone a smile, to hold open a door for someone, to ask someone how there day is going, etc.
There has recently been some controversy over a lesbian couple who took their children to Dollywood’s water amusement part Splash Country. One of the mothers was asked to turn her t-shirt inside out because it said “Marriage is so gay” on it. A lesbian couple who was entering the park with friends were asked to make the change by a worker who said the phrase “Marriage is so gay” might offend some patrons and that it is a “family park.” The couple obliged the employee, then registered a complaint with Dollywood. Dollywood has received a lot of flack over this issue. There are a few observations that I would like to make on this subject.
First of all, Dolly Parton who is the co-owner of Dollywood has been outspoken in the past about gay rights and gay marriage. Dolly has a rather large gay fan base. I for one have always been a big fan of Dolly Parton. In a 2009 interview with Joy Behar, Dolly stated her views on gay rights and gay marriage. See the video below:
Dolly is certainly not the conservative county music star that most of us see and hear about. Dolly seems more socially liberal than conservative. When asked by Bill O’Reilly if she was a conservative she told him “Not really, I’m more patriotic than political.” Dolly’s fan base covers a large range -she has both straight fans and gay fans. She has said, “I think it’s great when people accept themselves for exactly who they are and accept other people. I think that’s the key to happiness and success. It doesn’t matter who you are, as long as you do that really good. We’re all God’s children. He loves us all the same. We have to learn to love each other and ourselves a little better.”
Dolly Parton has responded to the gay marriage T-shirt controversy. Earlier this month, Dollywood front gate attendants asked Olivier Odom to turn her “marriage is so gay” shirt inside out for violating the park’s dress code. Parton issued the following statement to ABC on Friday:
“I am truly sorry for the hurt or embarrassment regarding the gay and lesbian t-shirt incident at Dollywood’s Splash Country recently. Everyone knows of my personal support of the gay and lesbian community. Dollywood is a family park and all families are welcome,” she wrote to ABC. ABC reports that Parton’s statement went on to explain that the dress code rules are enforced to protect the person wearing the shirt and keep park disturbances to a minimum. Parton concludes in writing, “I am looking further into the incident and hope and believe it was more policy than insensitivity. I am very sorry it happened at all.” As a bit of a side note, Dollywood has gay days similar to those at the Disney Theme Parks (at least they were doing so a few years ago, I’m not sure if they still do or not).
I have been to Dollywood several times when I was younger. We used to go to the mountains (that would be the Great Smokey Mountains for my family) about every other summer. Dollywood is on the East Tennessee side of the Great Smokey Mountain National Park. It was always a fun place to go, but make no mistake, it was a bit of a redneck heaven. It is in East Tennessee, Pigeon Forge to be exact, which is a bit of a country music paradise. Not all of the people there are rednecks but there are quite a number who are, some are just good country folk. The thing is, you know what kind of place you are going. I personally would not have worn a gay rights t-shirt, but then that’s me. I am not one to wear something as a political statement or wear something just to be noticed. That being said, the amusement park has stated that they asked the woman to turn her shirt inside-out because of their dress code. I don’t think the park was making any sort of statement against gay marriage. The printing on the shirt highlighted the words “so gay” in a way that made it look derogatory. A kid would likely not understand the play on words. Business Week reported that the couple, Jennifer Tipton and Olivier Odom, said they objected to the employee stating that it is a “family park” as a reason for her to have to hide the shirt. Apparently the couple took it personally and felt they were not looked at as a family. I think it’s likely the standard line when asking any guest to remove offending apparel.
That being said, I have never been comfortable with people derogatory phrases and turning them into empowering statement. A friend of mine used to use the phrase, “That’s so gay” all the time. I was the first gay person he had ever really knew was gay. I explained to him why I disliked the use of the phrase and he realized that it was derogatory and stopped. In fact, he quit allowing other friends of his to use the phrase when around him. I have also never been comfortable with the word faggot. I know that some gay people now use it as an empowering word, but for me it reminds me of all the times that I heard it in the most derogatory fashion and was so often called a faggot or a fag. I don’t like the word. I don’t like to read it. I don’t like to write it. I don’t like to hear it. I’ve gotten better at hearing the word queer, but I doubt I will ever get over flinching when I hear the word faggot.
African-Americans have been doing the same thing with the N-word. I detest that word, and I am white. I heard it far too often in a derogatory way growing up in the South. Yet, black people don’t want us to call them nigger, yet they will use it themselves. I received a text message the other day on my phone that read, “Damn you act like you don’t no a nigga.” The fact is that I did not know the person. It was a wrong number, but I would assume that the person was black. I have no proof of that though.
The lesbian woman wearing the shirt seems to me like cafeteria-style political correctness on the part of the couple, in the same way the person who texted me did. We want people to stop using words in an inflammatory manner, but we still want to be able to poke at something when it’s all in good fun. This one has to be all or nothing. Either kids continue to call something or someone “gay” in a derogatory manner or we stop it now. All of us.
How do you feel about inflammatory/derogatory speech when it is used in an empowering way?
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