Category Archives: Miscellaneous

New Phone

I got a new phone yesterday. Mine was an iPhone 8 and has been running slowly for the past couple of months. The battery has also not been lasting as long as it should have. It was time to get a new one. Verizon sent me an offer that was too good to turn down, and so I bought an iPhone 12 mini. I didn’t want a phone larger than the one I already had, so I got the mini. I know there are other features on the iPhone 12 and iPhone 12 Max, but I really don’t need those things. So, I bought it online and decided to pick it up from the Verizon Store in Burlington. After I got off work, I headed up to Burlington to get my phone and run a few errands. 

One of the errands was to find some good English muffins. I ate an English muffin made by the Vermont Bread Company every morning. They really were the best. I’ve been trying to find English muffins to replace them because last week, the Vermont Bread Company abruptly closed along with its parent company Koffee Kup Bakery. The two bakeries had been bought out at the beginning of April by an acquisition company that claimed they were going to expand the bakeries. Then after owning the bakeries for a few weeks, they closed them and told the employees as they came to work last Monday that they were out of a job. So far, every Engish muffin I have tried is terribly inferior to the Vermont Bread Company English muffins. The search continues.


I really just don’t have anything to say today. I hope everyone has a good weekend. Thank goodness it’s Friday.

Shopping with Eye Candy

Saturday, I had to make a trip to Burlington. Last weekend, I had bought two shirts to be picked up at Kohl’s. When I ordered them last weekend, both shirts were supposed available for same-day pick-up. However, when I got the notice that one of the shirts was available, the other was being shipped to the store. I was already in Burlington when I found out the other one was not actually available to be picked up. I was annoyed, but there wasn’t much I could do. I picked up the first shirt and had to wait until this last Saturday to pick up the other one. I had really not planned on going to Burlington this weekend, but when I woke up Saturday, I was feeling a little better even if my mouth was still sore, so I decided to head to Burlington and get lunch, pick up my shirt, and get a few other things that I needed from the “big city.”

I decided to have lunch at Chii’s because I wanted to eat soup because of my mouth, and I really like their chicken enchilada soup. I was pleasantly surprised to see a hot young gay man as the host stand. Following him to my table let me get a good lock at his tight little butt. Even more of a pleasant surprise was that he sat me where I had a perfect view of his backside as he stood at the host stand. He was such a cutie, but too young for me. However, it made my lunch much more pleasant, especially considering I had to have gotten one of the worst waitresses there. So, I had lunch and then headed to Kohl’s.

It seemed like all day as I was out and about, there were hot guys everywhere. Some of you may have experienced this, but it’s fairly rare in Vermont. The guy who brought out my Kohl’s order to my car was cute. Then there was a guy walking his dog at the mall who was hot and muscular. When I went into Target for a few things, it seemed like I was surrounded by hot guys everywhere. Basically, all the cute guys were out in full force Saturday. With all that eye candy, I’m surprised that my blood sugar didn’t go up. Other things were up instead. Maybe I was just horny.

Some of you may also be wondering how I am feeling. My mouth is still very sore, and the tooth socket still continues to bleed a little here and there. The inner gum is much sorer than the outer gum. The swelling is still causing nerve pain on the right side of my head. Otherwise, I guess I am feeling okay. I do still believe that as the swelling goes down, I will have less nerve pain since the pressure on my trigeminal nerve should be relieved.

Because of the continued pain, I wish I did not have such a busy week. Today, I have a virtual museum tour for one of our alumni groups. I will spend tomorrow preparing the final touches for my presentation on Wednesday. Thursday I have to get my weekly COVID test, and thankfully, I am off on Friday. The good thing is that I will be fully vaccinated on Thursday. If I can just make it through this week, then hopefully, the tooth socket will have healed a bit more, and I will begin feeling better.

UPDATE: My day has not gone as planned. I woke up with a really bad headache with the right side of my head pounding. I took my headache medicine and went to work, hoping that it would get better. It only got worse. I got in touch with my boss and told him I needed to go home sick today because I was in too much pain. Therefore, the museum is closed today, and I am back home. My boss is going to come in and do the virtual tour then leave. He was supposed to be off today as was everyone but me.

I called my oral surgeon’s office because my aunt who’s a dental assistant told me I should not still be in pain and I might have a dry socket. oral surgeon’s nurse told me to take some Tylenol, and if the pain didn’t improve today they’d have me come in tomorrow morning. I know a lot of people misuse prescription pain medicines, especially opioids, but dammit, sometimes they are needed. If my Anaprox isn’t helping, what the fuck do they think Tylenol will do? It just pisses me off that I have to remain in excruciating pain because people can’t take medication responsibly. I’ve never abused prescription painkillers, and I don’t plan to, even if I could get them prescribed.

Grindrs and Tinders and Growlrs, Oh My!

Dating apps, and really they are just hookup apps, suck! When you live in an area with very few gay people and no gay bars (not that any would be open right now anyway), dating apps are one of the few things to turn to in order to meet someone. Sadly, there seem to be only a few types of guys on these apps. There are the men who only want a hookup (most often they can’t host because they are cheating on someone), and all that ever happens with these guys is a suck and fuck and go, never to be heard from again. 

The one-night stand guys are bad enough, but then there are the scammers/catfishes. These guys are usually some guy at a computer in Africa, and they “fall in love” very quickly. They seem very sweet, but most often, their grammar is terrible. Some claim to be in the U.S. Army, often serving in Iraq or Afghanistan. Others just live a thousand or so miles from you. They love to send pictures, which you can often reverse image search and find who they are really of, but some even make fake social media profiles using those pics to try to deceive you further and cover their trail. Eventually, they slip up, or they begin to ask for money. Whatever it is, they seem to fall in love with you very quickly declaring that you are his soul mate. I hate these people.

Then, there are the cheaters who are in a relationship with a girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, or husband. They may not be just a one-night stand, though often they are. If they are with a woman, they are often bisexual or gay and in the closet. Years ago, back in Mississippi, I hooked up with a teacher. He kept talking about his kids the whole time. I thought he was talking about his students, as I always referred to my students as “my kids.” Then, mid blowjob, he mentioned his wife. It did not register with me at first. Honestly, I didn’t fully understand that’s what he said until we had finished, and he was leaving. I could be a bit naïve at times. That is the only time, to my knowledge, that I have ever hooked up with someone who was married. It was almost all worth it to run into him with his wife in Walgreens. The horror on his face was all the revenge I needed. I didn’t even act like I knew him, but it was obvious he recognized me. He hurriedly left the store with his wife.

Of course, there will always be the teasers. They want to lead you on. They get off on flirting and dirty talk, but they have no intention of ever meeting. This can be fun but also frustrating. You’re constantly led on, but nothing more ever happens. The worst is when they agree to meet and either cancel last minute or never show up. I’ve had this happen before too. We have probably all had this happen. Either they lose their nerve and never even go to meet you, or they get there, see you and turn around and leave.

In a small area, like where I live, you have another type, the ones who are always on the apps. You log on, and it’s the same guys over and over. You recognize all of them, and you know they are not compatible for one reason or another. Either they only want a very masculine guy, they want someone younger, older, or the same age, or they want a particular body type. I understand having a type, but jeez, give a guy a chance. You might find that you have more in common than you think. Even if it’s not going to be romantic, you could still be friends. Some guys will never give someone who doesn’t meet their ideal a chance.

Sadly, so few of the guys on these apps are looking for friends or a relationship. I have tried dating apps numerous times. On only three or four occasions have I met someone who wanted a relationship. For one reason or another, none of them ever worked out. Recently, I have tried the dating apps again, but it’s the same old shit. It’s all horndogs, scammers, cheaters, or teasers. Maybe some of the guys I’ve chatted with on these apps will turn out to be something, but I am not going to be overly optimistic. Honestly, is it too much to ask for a coffee date or to go out to dinner? I’d even be willing to go for a hike or something just to get to know a guy and meet him a few times before we jump into bed together. Is that so hard? I guess my title should have been, “Grindrs and Tinders and Growlrs, Oh Well!” It’s always worth a try.

P.S. I know we are in a pandemic, and options are limited until both parties are vaccinated, but this has been an issue for as long as meeting someone on the internet has been around.

Lazy Day

 I’ll be honest. I was feeling incredibly lazy yesterday. I ran a quick errand to get a few things at the grocery store, but otherwise, I mostly just spent a lazy day watching TV. When it came time to write a post for today, I continued to be lazy. I hope all of you had a wonderful weekend, and that we will all have a great week ahead.

The Eyes Have It

I usually write my posts the night before I post them in the morning. Sometimes, if I am not busy working from home, I write them during the day. Sometimes, I am inspired by the news or random thoughts. Other times, I am inspired for a picture that I see, and it evokes certain thoughts. This post was one of the latter. Since I was having my MRI last night and did not get home until late, I didn’t have much to say today. I hope I will get the results sometime today, but until then, here are some lovely pictures of men’s eyes. One of the advantages of everyone wearing masks is that we get to focus on a person’s eyes. Some men have beautiful eyes, and I am often attracted to the eyes of a man (okay, as is evident by a lot of the pictures I post, I also usually check out their butts as well, LOL).

This brings me to another interesting phenomenon of the pandemic. We have all heard of catfishing (if you haven’t, it is the process of luring someone into a relationship by means of a fictional online persona). There is also another less devious term I heard the other day: Hatfishing, when a handsome man looks hot wearing a hat, then, when he takes it off he goes from “That man is gorgeous!” to “What was I thinking?” During the pandemic, I have noticed one more version of this: maskfishing, where a person appears to be more attractive because they are wearing a facemask. In both hatfishing and maskfishing, we often notice the eyes first (or his butt, according to which way he is facing).

Here are some wise quotes about eyes:

  1. “The soul, fortunately, has an interpreter —often an unconscious but still a faithful interpreter —in the eye.” —Charlotte Bronte
  2. “Eyes so transparent that through them the soul is seen.” —Theophile Gautier
  3. “Where words are restrained, the eyes often talk a great deal.” —Samuel Richardson
  4. “The eyes only see what the mind is prepared to comprehend.” —Henri Bergson
  1. “Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?” —Henry David Thoreau
  2. “No one can lie, no one can hide anything, when he looks directly into someone’s eyes.” —Paulo Coelho
  3. “The face is a picture of the mind with the eyes as its interpreter.” ― Marcus Tullius Cicero
  1. “The eyes shout what the lips fear to say.” —William Henry
  2. “The eyes indicate the antiquity of the soul.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson
  3. “It’s true about the eyes being the window to the soul. Your face can be etched with worry, and twisted by ageing, but the eyes tell the true story of who you are.” —Naomie Harris
  4. “The real lover is the man who can thrill you just by touching your head or smiling into your eyes —or just by staring into space.” — Marilyn Monroe
  1. “The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears.” —John Vance Cheney
  2. “For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.” —Audrey Hepburn
  3. “The world only exists in your eyes. You can make it as big or as small as you want.” —F. Scott Fitzgerald

Another Week Begins

I had several errands to run this weekend. Luckily, I was generally feeling okay with a dull headache during much of the day. However, by nightfall, the headache is usually at its worse. Last night was no different. I was watching TV and realized I needed to put together a post for today, but my head was aching so badly that I gave up trying to say anything of substance. I hope all of you had a good weekend.

Slightly Cracked

Radio host Bernard Meltzer said, “A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.” I consider my readers my friends. I have corresponded with some of you through email, some I have met in real life, and others, like Susan, became great friends that I talk to regularly. Many of you have stuck with me in my journey for many years. Some only recently found my blog, but none of that matters because I consider you all friends. I would hope that most of you think of me as a “good egg” even if I am “slightly cracked.” I am not perfect, and I never will be. None of us are perfect, but all we can do is try our best.

My favorite philosopher is the transcendentalist Ralph Waldo Emerson. His 1841 essay “Self-Reliance” has been my personal philosophy for many years. The essay contains the most comprehensive statement of one of Emerson’s recurrent themes: the need for each individual to avoid conformity and false consistency and follow his or her instincts and ideas. We are all unique, and we need to accept our uniqueness. Even with our individuality, we are always searching for others like us, and this blog has become a community of people who care, and I am thankful for each of you. Emerson said, “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.”

Your words of encouragement after yesterday’s post have meant more to me than you can imagine. Some of them even brought me to tears because I realized just how much some of you genuinely care about me, and for that, I am forever grateful. John F. Kennedy once said, “We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives.” You all make a difference in my life. I have been through many trials and tribulations in my life, but I have also had some triumphs. My readers have been with me through thick and thin, and I appreciate your support.

Short Post

I don’t have much to say today. A lot is going on in the news. There was a tornado in Fultondale, Alabama. Senator Patrick Leahy was hospitalized last night, but apparently, he was released a short time later. My thoughts and prayers are with the people of Fultondale and with Senator Leahy. There are other things I could write about, but as I was writing this last night, I just wasn’t up to writing much. Every once in a while, I just need to take a day off.

Can I Use Your Bathroom?

Neighbors of Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump are saying that the president’s daughter and her husband instructed their Secret Service detail not to use any of the six bathrooms in their home. Seriously, they have six bathrooms in their home, and they couldn’t set aside just one for the men and women there to protect them. Does this sound familiar to anyone? It reminded me of a particular movie I saw a few years ago: The Help.

In the movie The Help, the character Hilly, an elitist white supremacist woman, tries to get a law passed to forbid white families from letting their domestic servants use the bathroom inside the house. Hilly insists that everyone install separate bathrooms for their “help.” Minny, Hilly’s black maid, is fired for using the guest bathroom and is rendered unemployable due to Hilly’s lies. Minny gets her revenge for the injustice. Minny committed what she calls a “terrible awful.” After her termination, Minny brought Hilly her famous chocolate pie, but after Hilly had finished two slices, Minny revealed that she baked her own shit into the pie. If you haven’t seen the movie, I am sorry that I gave this part away, but I wanted to make a point. Maybe someone will serve the Kushners one of Minny’s famous “chocolate” pies.

The fact that there are people who are as elitist as the Kushners is so infuriating. The Kushners have six bathrooms in their home, yet they wouldn’t allow the men and women who are sworn to give their lives to protect them to use just one of those bathrooms. Furthermore, this elitism came at a cost to the U.S. taxpayers. Since September 2017, the federal government has spent $3,000 a month — more than $100,000 to date — to rent a basement studio, with a bathroom, from a Kushner family neighbor for the Secret Service to use.

I despise elitism. I especially hate academic elitism, something I have been the victim of many times. I don’t care what college or university you graduated from. It is what a person makes of their education that means more. Just because someone went to Harvard, Princeton, Yale, or Penn doesn’t make them intelligent, especially when you are too stupid to understand that your candidate lost the election. These same idiots continued their false claims when no fraud was found even after every judge and election official in the country declared the election free and fair. You are either stupid or a liar if you can’t see what has been proven over and over again. In recent days, I have heard numerous times that Senators Ted Cruz and Josh Hawley are “very smart men” because they went to an Ivy League school. George W. Bush went to an Ivy League school. I never heard even his most ardent supporters, hell I never even heard his family, say that Bush was a “very smart man” because he attended an Ivy League school, let alone any other reason.

I think the whole college admission scandal that Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin got caught up in showed us that just because someone went to an elite school, it does not mean they had the smarts to attend. It just proved that they had the money to get admitted and enough money to make sure they made the right grades. When I graduated high school, I got accepted to every college to which I applied. Some were the most elite colleges of the South, but my family did not have the money to pay for those colleges. I could have applied to other colleges. I have no doubt I would have been admitted to any college I applied to, but I did not have the money for the application fees for many of these colleges, and because of my parents’ very modest middle-class incomes, I did not qualify for assistance. The only scholarship at a major university I received was because a family friend called in a favor, but I did not take that scholarship because the person who was convinced to give me the scholarship could only guarantee it for one year, and he was retiring. There was no guarantee I’d get the scholarship the next year, and there would be no one to turn to for help (back then, this university only gave scholarships through their alumni association, so you were at their mercy). I chose to attend a smaller college that gave full scholarships to all high school valedictorians in Alabama, and I was my small high school’s valedictorian. 

I learned a very valuable lesson from attending that small college. After undergrad, I went to a graduate school with one of the top three military history programs in the country. It also had an excellent and well-respected civil rights history program. We had students from some of the most prestigious colleges in the country in our program. What I realized was that I had gotten a far better education at my small state college that always seemed to be fighting for every penny of funding they could than elite schools with multimillion-dollar endowments. I had made the most of the opportunities I had. I took advantage of every opportunity to increase my attractiveness on the job market. Yet, I struggled financially for years, trying to find a decent job. Eventually, I had to move back in with my parents in Alabama and take whatever job I could get. Being a 7th-12th grade social studies and English teacher took up all of my free time, and eventually, the funding for my Ph.D. ran out before I could finish my dissertation.

Through a series of unfortunate events, I found myself jobless after I had basically sacrificed everything for my job as a teacher. I had always dreamed of being a teacher. I loved teaching, but teaching the children of white supremacists at a small private school in Alabama took its toll on me. My health suffered, and I lost my job. The school hired a football coach to replace me and did not renew my contract. They gave me absolutely no notice. They never even hinted that my job was in jeopardy. I found myself jobless and penniless. Thankfully, the people who read this blog helped me out and sustained me until I found my current job thanks to those marketable skills I had worked so hard to add to my resume. Ten years ago, I would have never believed that I would now be a museum curator and a professor at one of America’s oldest colleges.

I know I have gotten off on a tangent and onto my soapbox about my own struggles against elitism, but the point I am trying to make is that I worked my ass off to get where I am. People in the outgoing presidential administration got everything handed to them, and they have given nothing back to society. The Kushners took their entitled and elitist attitudes and refused to allow the people who were there to save their lives the right to use just one of their six bathrooms. Thankfully, not all wealthy people are like this. There are plenty of wealthy people out there who either believe in Andrew Carnegie’s Gospel of Wealth, or they just believe in helping those in need because it is the human thing to do. For those people, I am grateful. I am thankful that there are good people out there who are not selfish and elitist. I know that I will never be counted as one of the wealthy, but I believe in helping those around me whenever I can and in whatever way I can.