A Long Day
The movers came at 8 am and loaded everything on their truck, drove to my new apartment, and unloaded my stuff. The movers I hired were fantastic. They took great care of my stuff and were exceedingly nice. I did some unpacking yesterday and set up my new mattress, but it needs 24 hours to expand before it’s ready to sleep on. I was up late the night before getting the last few things done and ready for the movers. I was utterly exhausted and went to bed early last night.
When I moved to my last apartment, Isabella hid for nearly a week. She does not like change. Yesterday, she hid for about two hours and has been roaming around exploring ever since. She eventually settled down and found some place to curl up and sleep for a while. A cat has to have her naps. She seems to really like the new place and so do I.
Moving Day
Today is moving day. The movers will be here at 8 am. Hopefully, it won’t take them all day to get me moved. I was up very late last night getting the last little bit packed. I’ll be so glad when all this is over and I’m completely moved into my new apartment.
Exciting News!
Programming Note: If I post a poem this week, it will be on Friday, because there’s a lot going on this week.
As you all know, I developed trigeminal neuralgia after I had an abscessed tooth about eighteen months ago. Because of this, wearing my CPAP at night has been continuing to damage my trigeminal nerve. I am in pain any time I put the CPAP mask on, so I’ve been trying for nearly a year to get approved for an Inspire implant that would do the same thing as my CPAP, sort of a pacemaker for my throat, and the only outward part would be a small remote control that I’d use to turn it on when I go to bed and turn it off when I wake up. Back on December 8, I had a new sleep study which qualified me for the implant. My original sleep study showed that my sleep apnea was too severe for the implant, but sleep apnea can be greatly improved by a 10 percent weight loss. I have lost over 25 percent of my total weight, and after the news sleep study, my sleep apnea had improved enough for me to qualify for the Inspire implant.
With that hurdle passed, I went to see an ENT doctor for a consultation about the Inspire implant. I found out from her that I had one more hurdle to cross to qualify for the Inspire therapy: a sleep induced endoscopy, technically a laryngoscopy because they’ll be looking at my throat only, not my stomach. In this laryngoscopy, I’ll be put to sleep so the doctor can see if my throat closes front to back or from side to side. If it closes front to back (I think that the right one), then I’d be qualified for the Inspire surgery.That ENT appointment was on January 10, and I have been waiting to be scheduled for the laryngoscopy. Finally, the ENT’s office called and scheduled the laryngoscopy for the morning of April 29. My boss will take me down to the hospital and bring me back.
I have to see my doctor for a pre-op physical, and so, I called my doctor’s office to schedule the physical. I have a regular physical schedule for May 4, but I need a pre-op physical no later than April 25 because of the laryngoscopy. Sadly, my doctor is booked, but I will be seeing one of the other providers. They’d suggested one, but I told them no, that I would not see her. I’ve had issues with this particular nurse practitioner, and I refuse to see her again. Considering that she always seems to be the one with open appointments and that the office doesn’t even blink an eye when I say I won’t see her, I’m guessing others have the same complaint. So, they scheduled me with another nurse practitioner. I’m not happy that I can’t see my doctor, since he knows my medical history best, but it’s just a physical.
I feel like I have been waiting so long, and I guess, I have. Please pray that I can get over this last hurdle and get the implant. It will take a few more months after the endoscopy for the implant surgery, but things finally seem to be moving along.
I’m still packing and getting ready for the movers to come at 8 am tomorrow. So much to do before then…
The Trials and Tribulations of Moving Prep
No matter how diligently you plan or how prepared you think you are, things rarely go as smoothly as they should. Moving prep has been no exception. Last Friday a week ago (March 25th), I emailed my new apartment manager with questions about setting up the electricity in my name. I could not call her as the only phone number I had went directly to automatic voicemail. Saturday, Sunday, and Monday came and went with no response. I emailed again on Tuesday. With no response by Thursday (March 31st), I took it upon myself to call the power company to set up my account with the hope I was doing the right thing. It turned out this was an easy process. After a five-minute conversation, I had power set to turn on the morning of the next day, April 1st, the day my lease began.
That same morning, I finally received a reply from the apartment manager. She said she had seen my email from a week ago and had tried calling and texting but had not gotten a response from me. I emailed that I had not received any texts or phone calls and gave her my personal phone number just to clarify. It turned out she had been leaving messages and texts on my office phone while I had been on vacation! I also told her I had already taken care of the electricity, and it should have been turned on that morning.
She called a few minutes later. Apparently, things were not going as planned on her end. The previous tenant had not moved out on the date she’d given as her vacate notice. There was a problem with the apartment where the old tenant was moving, and she decided to stay a few extra weeks without telling anyone. When she finally did move out, she had left some furniture that needed to be removed. Also, it quickly became apparent that one or both of her cats had been urinating on the carpet in the second bedroom. The apartment company had shampooed the carpets and was shampooing them again that morning trying to get the smell out of the carpet.
As you know, I had planned to go by the apartment on Friday to move in a few things especially into the second bedroom. That was not possible now. The apartment manager asked me to come by on Sunday (I had to work Saturday) to verify whether I could smell urine in the second bedroom. If the smell was still there, they would remove the carpeting, reseal the floor underneath, and lay down new carpeting. She assured me that my planned move-in day of April 6th was still good, but the second bedroom might not be completely ready if the carpeting needed replacement. I did go to the apartment yesterday. There was a strong odor of cat urine in the second bedroom. I told the apartment manager the carpet would need to be replaced. They are ripping out the old carpet today. She is scheduling the carpet people to come as soon as they can to lay the new carpet.
The rest of the apartment is in pretty good shape. I measured everything so I could decide ahead of time where I want to place my furniture. I will have to buy new blinds for the windows. The ones that are there will not do. The apartment’s maintenance person will install all the blinds; I just need to buy them. I set up the wi-fi and cable box although the cable box installation won’t finish until I bring in my TV. Otherwise, the apartment is move-in ready for this Wednesday.
All that’s left now is finishing packing up my current apartment. To be continued…
Inner Peace
Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.
— John 14:27
There is no more extraordinary gift than learning to feel at home in yourself. You can change everything about the world around you, but if you haven’t done the work on yourself, you will still feel imprisoned in your own mind. I think that is one of the primary reasons I encourage anyone to come out. The closet is a place for us to hide the internal war of who we are and to hide our inner self, and that internal war does not lend itself to inner peace. It is a war in which far too many LGBTQ+ individuals become casualties. Acceptance is the only weapon we can use to win this war.
Every time we check our phones or look at the news, the future seems increasingly uncertain. Whether it’s global conflicts such as the war raging in Ukraine, or the world-wide pandemic caused by COVID-19. The uncertainty also extends to our very being as LGBTQ+ individuals. As more and more states attack LGBTQ+ rights and our very existence, we may find it challenging to find peace amid these distressing circumstances. Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay” bill was just signed into law by the governor of that state. Republican lawmakers in Arizona, Alabama, Indiana, Kentucky, Oklahoma, New Hampshire, and South Dakota introduced at least nine measures this year that target transgender and nonbinary youths, such as their ability to participate in sports, receive gender-affirming care, or use the bathroom. There are constant movements in states dominated by anti-LGBTQ+ politicians to reverse gay marriage. It’s all extraordinarily disconcerting and adds to the internal struggles of many LGBTQ+ individuals.
This uncertainty has also crept into our daily lives, raising worries about our jobs, finances, friends, families, etc. Even as LGBTQ+ believers who know and love the Lord, we may find it challenging to truly be at peace during these times as people who claim they know and love the Lord attack our very being. For instance, take right-wing QAnon conspiracy theorist and U.S. Representative Lauren Boebert (R-Colorado), who on Friday asked Twitter to explain to her why the law does not “require” LGBTQ+ Americans to wait until they are 21 years old to come out.
The ignorance is astounding! Sadly, this wasn’t even a sick April Fool’s joke, although Boebert is a fool on April 1st and any other of the 364 days of the year, for that matter.
Even with all of these assaults on our identity, the Bible assures us that the Lord has promised true inner peace. Two verses in the Gospel of John reveal the source of this lasting peace. In John 14:27, Jesus says, “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” In this verse, Jesus promised to give us Hispeace. As the Prince of Peace, He is the unique source of true peace, which is altogether different from what the world gives. No matter how impossible our outward circumstances may seem, we can enjoy true peace from Jesus, and we do not need to be troubled or afraid. John 16:33 says, “These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” Jesus never promised that we wouldn’t experience difficulties in our lives. He plainly said, “In the world you will have tribulation.” Although we’re saved, we still live in this world full of suffering and distress. But these words from Jesus should bring us comfort, assuring us that even during our trials, we may have peace.
How do we practically experience this true and lasting peace in our daily lives? The apostle Paul gives us the key in Philippians 4:6-7: “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” Social isolation, discrimination, job insecurity, financial obligations, and many other things fill us with anxiety. We can’t escape our problems, but we can experience the peace of God during them. By turning our hearts to God through prayer, we connect with Him, which results in something marvelous. When we have fellowship with God, we’re revived and refreshed. As we petition Him concerning our needs, God infuses us with Himself as peace. We’re turned from worrying about our situation to thanking Him. Our environment may not change, but we’re changed. The peace of God guards our hearts and thoughts, saving us from anxiety.
As we continue to live under trying circumstances, we can enjoy God’s peace at any time. Anxious thoughts may come to us throughout the day, but we have the key! We can turn our hearts to Him and pray, call on His name, sing to Him, or simply talk to Him. Through our fellowship with Him, God becomes our true inner peace and rest, the much-needed antidote to our easily troubled soul.
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The Closet Professor 