Once I admitted to myself that I was gay, I decided that I had to come to terms with it more than just admitting it. I was lonely and wanted to find a boyfriend. This search still continues. Here is the last of the poems I wrote during this period.
The Urges
My heart aches,
My stomach churns,
My loins burn,
My head spins.
What are these symptoms of?
I have an itch
That cannot be scratched
If I only knew what was wrong
It happens when I see the beauty.
I either go mute or return to a stutter.
I tremble and quake and my nerves are shot to hell.
The agony of it.
I guess when I look back on retrospect, I was just horny as hell.
I apologize to all my readers for the lack of posts this week. I have been incredibly busy with my new job. That will probably continue for the next few weeks, but I will try to at least post once a day. I still have a few more in the coming out series that I will attempt to post in the next few days. Then we will be back to history, culture, art, and politics. Please stay tuned.
The Urges
My heart aches,
My stomach churns,
My loins burn,
My head spins.
What are these symptoms of?
I have an itch
That cannot be scratched
If I only knew what was wrong
It happens when I see the beauty.
I either go mute or return to a stutter.
I tremble and quake and my nerves are shot to hell.
The agony of it.
Joe
The Closet Professor 
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