My Health

Over the past couple of years I have been suffering from cluster headaches. At first they went undiagnosed, but a doctor diagnosed me with them about 18 months ago. I went through the treatment to stop their cycle and eventually it worked for a time. Then they came back, but not as strong as before I was put on a daily dose of a preventive medicine. About a month or so ago, I went to a neurologist. At first he did not believe I had cluster headaches or migraines. I have both. However, he decided he might as well try treating me for the cluster headaches since I have medicine that will stop the migraines.

The first thing he did was triple the dose of my medicine. I had been prescribed too low of a dose and he brought it up to the recommended level. Since then, I have been cluster headache free. When I went to see the neurologist yesterday, he finally agreed that I must have had cluster headaches since the treatment was working so well. I still have headaches, sinus headaches and the occasional migraine, but I no longer have the never ending pain of the chronic cluster headaches. The relief from the cluster headaches is tremendous, but even more so, I feel relief at knowing for sure what has been wrong with me the last several years.

My depression has also eased with an increased dosage of my antidepressant. I feel better right now then I have in years. The depression isn’t gone. I still have blue days here and there are moments of intense sadness, but it is not a constant state of sadness that I experienced before the increased antidepressant. I’ve also seen a drop in my anxiety. I don’t feel panicked all the time. I am calmer.

I tend to hide my pain very well. For the past year, especially the past ten months, I have been absolutely miserable. I was in constant pain, mentally and physically. Most people wouldn’t know it though because I hid it the best I could. Over the past month with changes to my medication, I feel better than I have in quite some time. Please pray for me that the pain will stay away. I realize that there will be periodic bouts of loneliness, fatigue, and depression, but they are no longer constant like they were. I hope and pray that my pain won’t be coming back any time soon.

About Joe

I began my life in the South and for five years lived as a closeted teacher, but am now making a new life for myself as an oral historian in New England. I think my life will work out the way it was always meant to be. That doesn't mean there won't be ups and downs; that's all part of life. It means I just have to be patient. I feel like October 7, 2015 is my new birthday. It's a beginning filled with great hope. It's a second chance to live my life…not anyone else's. My profile picture is "David and Me," 2001 painting by artist Steve Walker. It happens to be one of my favorite modern gay art pieces. View all posts by Joe

2 responses to “My Health

  • Rico

    I enjoy your posts very much. Am glad you are feeling better. For what it’s worth I suffered with depression for decades; from high school until mid-40s. Then it gradually faded away. Hope yours does the same.

  • Kathy

    I’m so glad you’re doing better. I lost a job of 26 years due to depression and anxiety. Then I started medication and therapy. I am the happiest I have been and feel good about myself for the first time in my life. I enjoy the thoughtfulness of your posts about God and our relationship with him. I also enjoy the pictures. 🤓

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