Author Archives: Joe
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The Need to Serve
“And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”
—Matthew 20:27-28
Do you ever go through days that seem like something is missing? We work so hard to accomplish goals in our life so that we can provide a better life for ourselves and our families. But this can also focus our attention on the “things” we have and more importantly don’t have. Where we direct our focus can lead us to that feeling of void. Instead of focusing on ourselves, direct your focus on someone in need. You may not see the immediate impact on your goals but in some way and at some time, God will honor your actions.
Sadly, too many people in this world forget this simple directive. We are not here to be served but to serve. We need to protect the needy and less fortunate. There is too much selfishness in the world today. Whether it’s those who don’t want the government to enact legislation to help the less fortunate, or those who won’t wear masks when it’s called for or even get the vaccine. These are simple things that we can do to help and protect others. Yet people resist out of their own selfishness. Many have various excuses, but very few of those excuses are valid.
Think of how wonderful this world would be if everyone let go of their anger, greed, and hatred of the unknown or the misunderstood. If we lived in a world of love, giving, and acceptance, we could live in a peaceful and joyous world. Instead, too many people feed and nourish and encourage the anger, greed, and ignorance of those they want to control and gain their support. The problem with feeding this negativity is that at some point you lose control of those masses you’ve cultivated and they become an unruly and angry mob.
If we just served and supported our fellow humans, then we would be glorifying God and we’d receive our own reward. When we follow the fear and ignorance of man, we drift further and further from God. Sadly, many of those who’ve drifted away from God the most are the ones who claim they are doing God’s work. Being a good Christian doesn’t mean shouting it from the rooftops and hating those who don’t believe the same way you do, but it is in our actions. James 2:17 tells us, “Faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.” We have to live in a way that honors God’s love for us. James 2:26 says, “For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also.” if you don’t live in a way consistent with your faith, then you do not really have faith.
The Sleep Clinic, AKA A Medical Bitch and Gripe Post
I am sure I have mentioned before that I have sleep apnea and I wear a CPAP to sleep. I have always hated wearing that thing, but I’ve gotten so used to getting a great night of sleep, that I really can’t go without it. However, I’ve also mentioned my trigeminal neuralgia. The straps on the CPAP mask aggravate my already damaged trigeminal nerve. Therefore, I go to sleep in pain, and I wake up with pain. I have spoken to the Sleep Clinic about the issue and have discussed with them a surgery that would implant a device, much like a pacemaker, that would have the same effect as the sleep mask, but not be as intrusive. However, the Sleep Clinic wants me to prove that the CPAP failed before they will let me be considered for the other device. Partly, this is because of insurance. I went to the medical equipment specialist that handle my CPAP supplies for a fitting for a new mask a few months ago. The mask they gave me is just as bad, plus I can’t breathe well enough through it, so I had to go down to the Sleep Clinic yesterday for them to try and fit me with a new mask.
That was an ordeal and a waste of time. First of all, the clinic is at Dartmouth-Hitchcock Hospital in the same building as the Headache Clinic, so it’s about an hour’s drive. Second, I don’t have the same confidence in the Sleep Clinic as I do in the Headache Clinic. When I first got the CPAP, they were supposed to follow up with me every three months, yet they forgot about me. It was only because I was having trouble with the CPAP mask and trigeminal neuralgia that they took notice of me again. That had me annoyed when they told me this three months ago. I got a call a few weeks ago wanting me to do a mask fitting before my appointment with the Sleep Clinic’s nurse practitioner on October 26. So I made the appointment and went down.
After trying on several masks, I told the respiratory therapist (RT) how much they hurt. All of which caused me to be in quite a bit of pain for the rest of the day. The RT I met with sent me home with a new mask to try, but I don’t hold out much hope it will work any better. It hurt to wear it for a few minutes down there, just like the others. I don’t know what she thinks it will do to sleep in it that’s different? What really aggravated me was that I had to pay $55 for basically the “pleasure” of visiting a showroom with a hospital bed in it. What bullshit! The lady was nice, but I really don’t think they should have charged me for this. The supply place didn’t charge me for their mask fitting, but because this was done in a clinic, they charged me, even though they did the exact same thing, I had to pay the higher copay to see a “specialist.” I’m also sure they will charge me for the mask they sent me home with.
I have told the Sleep Clinic people that my neurologist has already said that as long as I am wearing a CPAP at night, it will continue to prevent my trigeminal nerve from healing. It told the RT the same thing yesterday, to which she replied that maybe I should ask my neurologist if she has another solution to my sleep apnea. She said it in a very nice and “concerned” way, but I still felt like she was being somewhat dismissive of the advice I’d received from my neurologist. By the way, if I do qualify for the surgical implant, Dartmouth can’t do it (they have no one trained for it), and I’d have to go to the University of Vermont (UVM) instead. At this point, I wish I’d been referred to the UVM in the first place for my sleep apnea. I wasn’t originally sent to them because my doctor, who works for UVM, knows what a pain in the ass they can be. I see my neurologist Tuesday, so will talk to her, and then on the 26th, I’ll see what the Sleep Clinic has to say.
Six Years Ago…
Six years ago today, I arrived in Vermont. It had been a hellacious trip up here from Alabama. My plan had been to drive to Blacksburg, Virginia, the first day to see a friend who was a PhD student at Virginia Tech. Then I’d drive to Albany, New York, for the second leg of my trip getting up the next morning and drive to my new apartment in Vermont. The trip did not go as planned. In Knoxville, Tennessee, while blocked in on both sides by semi trucks, I had no choice but to run over something in the road. Whatever it was punctured my gas tank. I pulled over on the side of the interstate and watched as gasoline poured out from under my car. I had to call 911 and they sent police and a fire truck to make sure everything was okay and put some type of absorbent over the leaked gas.
Close to tears, I called my dad. All of my possessions to begin my new life in Vermont were inside my little car. One spark or a lit cigarette from a passing car and it would have all gone up in flames. My dad called the insurance company and they found me a mechanic, a hotel, and a rental car because it was going to take at least several days before the mechanic could get a new gas tank. The police called a tow truck who loaded up my car and drove me to the mechanic. The tow truck driver was kind enough to wait as the mechanic and I did whatever we initially had to do, and then he drove me to my hotel. He was so nice and kind; he made the whole thing a little more bearable.
I checked into the hotel and waited for my rental car to be delivered the next day. Only one restaurant was nearby, a Mexican restaurant, so that’s where I ate dinner and had a huge margarita. Luckily, I got a call from the mechanic saying they’d been lucky and were able to locate a gas tank at another mechanic in town. They were able to get it late the next day and install it the next. I was stuck in Knoxville for two and a half days, but my car was ready around 11 am if I remember correctly.
Off I was again to see how far I could drove that day. The remember driving through the Shenandoah Valley and thinking I’d never get through Virginia. Finally, I did and continued north. Late that night, I was so tired, I could not drive any further than Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. I pulled over at a hotel only to be told there was no room ar the inn. In fact some major convention was in town and few hotels had any vacancies. I finally found one, checked in and quickly crawled into bed and fell asleep. I got up early the next day and drove the rest of the way to my new apartment. That last eight hours and 500 miles was rough, but I did it.
October 7, 2015, I started my new life in Vermont.
Crazy Week
I was sitting on my bed last night trying to decide what to write about today. My week is a lot of miscellaneous stuff. Yesterday, I taught a class that I usually teach once a year and then had a meeting to discuss the applicants for the job opening we have at the museum. Today, I really only have one thing: a doctor’s appointment. I think I am having an adverse reaction to one of my headache medicines, and I need to talk to my doctor to see if he thinks it is the medicine causing the problem or something else. It’s a sensitive and embarrassing issue, so it won’t be easy to discuss, but thankfully, I do feel comfortable enough with my doctor that I can discuss anything with him. But boy do I dread this conversation because it is going to be embarrassing. Then tomorrow, I have an appointment at the sleep clinic about my CPAP machine. Luckily, I don’t seem to have any appointments either away from work or at work. It should be an easy day (knock on wood).
Next week is going to be the really crazy week. Monday, I have a class that I’ve never taught before coming to the museum. I’m really not sure how that’s going to go, but I think there is a good possibility that it will go well. Tuesday, I have two medical appointments. One here in town for blood work, and one down at Dartmouth with the Headache Clinic. Wednesday, I am moderating a panel discussion, and you can never really know how those are going to go. In my experience, they never go quite like I hope they will. They have a life of their own. Then, Wednesday and Thursday afternoons and Friday we will be conducting the virtual job interviews for the applicants we chose trying to narrow down five candidates to two or three to bring to campus.
Hopefully, all will go smoothly, and no major problems or issues will arise.
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Joe
The Closet Professor 