Usually, when I listen to an audiobook in my car, I’m okay to stop when I get to my destination.  My daily commute to and from work is a 30-40 minute drive, so a ten hour long book usually takes me about two weeks to listen to fully..  However, every once in a while, I come across a book, and it is impossible for me to leave it in the car.  I find myself listening every moment I get outside of my car, including just before going to bed.  I’ve had books that I’ve read that I just couldn’t put down.  Erik Larson’s The Devil in the White City was like that, but it’s generally easier to pause an audiobook.  In fact, I can only think of twice when this has happened.  The first time was Brad Boney’s The Return, and the second was Heidi Cullinan’s Love Lessons.  I got invested in the characters and their situation so quickly, I just couldn’t let go, and though I loved the ending, this was a book that I almost cried because it was over.  I wanted more and thankfully, on the author’s website she has a link to a short story that is a continuation and I loved those twenty pages almost as much as I loved the whole book.  One quick thing, I do love Amy Lane’s books (one of my all time favorite authors) but when I’m listening to her books, sometimes you have to take a break from the emotional roller coaster or your heart will explode.

I’ve already reviewed The Return, but Love Lessons is a book that captured my heart and wouldn’t let it go.  Initially, you might not be endeared to the two main character Walter and Kelly, but these boys quickly work their way into your heart.  Neither are perfect characters.  One is overly idealistic, while the other is overly cynical, and whereas that might sound like a turn off, Walter and Kelly are far more complicated than that.  I absolutely fell in love with Kelly after he suffers a major allergic reaction and is mortified.  Cullinan wrote:

Kelly’s allergies set him apart.  I think this touched me because so many of us find that there is something that sets us apart and keeps us from feeling normal.  I have a dear friend who suffers from anxiety and depression, and I’ve heard him say, “I just want to be normal.  I’m so fucked up.”  The truth is, he is not “fucked up” but his anxiety makes him feel different and separate.  My depression and headaches make me feel the same way.  We all see that thing that sets us apart as something that is abnormal or fucked up, but we learn to love with our separateness and not let it stop us.  It doesn’t stop Kelly, and probably more so than anything, it allows him to understand the demons that haunt Walter.

The complexities of Cullinan’s characters are not the only only thing that drew me into this book.  It takes place at the fictional Hope University, where diversity and acceptance are supposed to be its major mission beyond excellent academics.  Hope is billed as a family and community for its students and faculty.  However, like much of life, the university isn’t the Disney fantasy it portrays itself to be.  There are loopholes in the system.  They may technically deliver on promises,  but they aren’t following the spirit of their mission.  Corners are cut and the students and faculty find that it’s at their expense.

Heidi Cullinan says she has always loved a good love story, provided it has a happy ending, which means she’s a woman after my own heart. Though her writing spans across many genres, she loves above all to write happy, romantic endings for LGBT characters because there just aren’t enough of those stories out there. Cullinan is a vocal advocate for LGBT rights and is proud to be from the first Midwestern state with full marriage equality. And because it may be of interest to at least one of my readers, I think I read that Cullinan lives in Ames, Iowa, but I couldn’t find the reference again.  You can find out more about Cullinan, find the short story sequel “Frozen Heart”, and links to her social networks, at www.heidicullinan.com.  I think I’ve found a new author to love.

The narrator for Love Lessons is Iggy Toma, a voice-over artist, musician, and activist based in New York City. He is an avid reader of romance and mystery, and he has a soft spot for daytime soap operas, which comes through in a good way as the narrator of a romance novel.  I was really drawn into his narration and it really brought the emotions alive for me.  I only have one complaint, and this is just a small (very small) thing that bugged me, but I can’t let it go.  As part of Hope University, the upperclassmen dorms, called the Manors, has each individual “manor” named after civil rights martyrs.  Kelly notices one called Dahmer, to which Walter explains, “Vernon not Jeffrey,” which would be clever and I assume that’s what Cullinan meant, but the names are actually pronounced quite differently, no matter the spelling.  The serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer is pronounce “DAH-mer” but the Mississippi civil right martyr Vernon Dahmer (and someone I have always found to be a true hero) is pronounced “DAY-mer”. I know that is being petty, but I’ve met Vernon Dahmer’s widow, Ellie, and their children several times, and I’ve heard firsthand how they pronounce their name.  I can’t help it that as a historian I caught on to that.  I’m sure most people wouldn’t.

This is one instance where I loved that the book wasn’t filled with angst.  Will they or won’t they get together?  Except for Walter and Kelly, everyone knows exactly where this relationship is headed.  There’s plenty of drama and heartbreak but you know they will overcome it in the end.  Their relationship grows from a great friendship and mutual lust for one another, but grows deeper throughout the book.  I know I’ve said this already, but you become invested in these characters.

There are a lot of lessons in this book, but at its heart is a love story. A beautiful love story and we should remember that as the books tag line says, “Love doesn’t come with a syllabus.”

A blurb for Love Lessons:

Kelly Davidson has waited what seems like forever to graduate high school and get out of his small-minded, small town. But when he arrives at Hope University, he quickly realizes finding his Prince Charming isn’t so easy. Everyone here is already out. In fact, Kelly could be the only virgin on campus. Worst of all, he’s landed the charming, handsome, gay campus Casanova as a roommate, whose bed might as well be equipped with a revolving door.
Walter Lucas doesn’t believe in storybook love. Everyone is better off having as much fun as possible with as many people as possible…except his shy, sad little sack of a roommate is seriously screwing up his world view. As Walter sets out to lure Kelly out of his shell, staying just friends is harder than he anticipated. He discovers love is a crash course in determination. To make the grade, he’ll have to finally show up for class…and overcome his own private fear that love was never meant to last.

Will Lafferty and Kenny Scalia are both having sort of a day. Will gets fired for letting fifth graders read Harry Potter, and Kenny finds his boyfriend and his sex toys in bed with a complete stranger. When Will knocks over Kenny’s trash can—and strews Kenny’s personal business all over the street—it feels like the perfect craptastic climax to the sewage of suckage that has rained down on them both.

But ever-friendly, ever-kind Will asks snarky Kenny out for a beer—God knows they both need one—and two amazing things occur: Kenny discovers talking to Will might be the best form of intercourse ever, and Will discovers he’s gay.

Their unlikely friendship seems like the perfect platonic match until Will reveals how very much more he’s been feeling for Kenny almost since the beginning. But Kenny’s worried. Will’s newfound sexuality is bright and glittery and shiny, but what happens when that wears off? Is Will’s infatuation with Kenny strong enough to stay real?

If you’ve read many of my book reviews, then you know I am a tremendous fan of Amy Lane. I love the emotions she brings out, though she is known by her monicker “Angst and Pain” Amy Lane, her 2014 book Shiny! is one of her finest creations. Not much angst and pain here, but a beautiful love story. Lane has written romances about knitters, porn stars, and horse trainers, but underneath all of her greatest creations are the shy, awkward, and a bit geeky. Two of my favorite characters, Shane Perkins and Evan Costa, are both closet geeks, while another favorite characters of mine, Wes “Whiskey” Keenan, is a teacher, professor actually. Lane does a stunning job when she puts forth a character who is shy, awkward, and geeky, but in Shiny! she has outshone herself with a character I instantly fell in love with, Will Lafferty.

Will is big and awkward, socially inept, loves science fiction and fantasy, and is a teacher, who has such a supreme passion for teaching, it makes my heart ache. Lane is a former teacher, and the mind of an educator comes through so well in Shiny!, as Will shows what I can only believe was the enthusiasm that Lane showed as a teacher. Those students who had Amy Lane as a teacher have to be some of the luckiest students in America. Lane passion for education comes across in Will throughout the book, even though Will lost his job as a teacher in the first chapter. When at the end of the book, Will explained why he’d let the students in the fundamentalist Christian school read Harry Potter, your heart leaps with joy for someone who can understand the supreme value of reading.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the character of Kenny Scalia. Kenny is full of worldly sass and really finds it difficult to trust and you just care so much for him. He’s also fun and dorky and nice (though sometimes he forgets to be the friendliest of people, but it is unintentional). Kenny is a fun character that serves as just enough of a contrast to make him the perfect fit for Will. And it’s hard not to love him when he says things like this:

“I was looking for sparkly. I should have been looking for warm and real.”

Kenny finds warm and real in Will, but Will is the true star of this book for me. He may not be as shiny as the outgoing Kenny, but he shines brighter than any character that I’ve ever been introduced to by Amy Lane. Will’s brilliance only shines brighter when in a nearly twenty-four hour period, he realizes that he is gay, when it took me nearly twenty-four years to realize. With Will, it just all clicked into place. However, Will, like I did, never thought it was a possible action to be gay. For me, that was taught consciously, but for Will, it was just not something he is aware of. Though it is a speedy coming out, which serves as a quick literary device, it mirrors my own coming out but mine was at a much slower pace.

No one can quite capture geeky awkwardness like Amy Lane can. Shiny! is a perfect example. As you know, I often listen to audiobooks on my drive back and forth from school. This was no exception and one of the things that makes this book even more enjoyable is the narrator Tyler Stevens. I cannot say it any better than Lisa did over on her blog “A Novel Approach” so I won’t try:

[Tyler Stevens] gives Will a voice that builds in confidence. Will was very quick to describe himself in the beginning of the story as “a totally average, normal, Christian-looking dude!” Tyler Stevens was able to build Will’s voice. At the beginning of the tale he did sound like an average, normal dude. When he discovers his “gayness,” he sounds like a kid in a candy shop discovering all sorts of new things. In the end he sounds confident, mature and completely in love. That’s what keeps a listener engaged, in my opinion. Not only did the story have a beginning, middle, and end, the narration did too. It kept me engaged throughout.

On a final note, the discussion Kenny has with Will about the realities of teaching as an out gay man, really brought this story home to me. If you’ve read my posts Monday and Tuesday, you know I can identify with this. Will is so good-natured and caring that he would never have been satisfied with not being able to be open and honest about the love of his life. If Will were forced to hide his true self, whether it be his love of Harry Potter or that he loves a man, he wouldn’t have been complete. When a teacher has to hide a part of himself, then he is not able to give his all for his students. When I’ve taught college, I had no reason to have to hide my sexuality, and it helped me to be a lively and engaging lecturer, but when teaching high school, there are so many parts of myself that I must hide and thus my students don’t get the real me.

Shiny! really is a must read. It is Amy Lane at her finest.

Often times, I read books because friends suggestion them. I have one particular reading buddy who I love to discuss books with. He and I both are Amy Lane fans, but occasionally, I come across a book that draws me in because if the title or author, even sometimes the cover art. I don’t want to say which of those three drew me to this book, but for those who happen to know me personally, I bet you can guess. When I saw The Guy from Galmour by Skylar M Cates, I knew this was a M/M romance I had to read. And, I am so glad that I did. The Guy from Glamour is part of Cates’s “The Guy Series,” which I’m eagerly starting the second book in the series today.

Description: Anthony Carrino loves his big, gregarious Italian-American family, even if his sisters are interfering, and his dad, the local sheriff, knows everything going on in town. He’s happy as a middle school guidance counselor. Despite helping kids and their parents fix their problems, Anthony can’t manage to get his own love life right. If only everyone would stop calling him the “nice” guy.

Dean Pierce doesn’t do relationships. A tough-minded military man, he is dedicated to his job as a Night Stalker, flying Chinook helicopters and not speaking much to anybody. He certainly doesn’t want to deal with a mess of emotions. But when tragedy strikes, Dean finds his hands full with his troubled niece, her irresistible guidance counselor, and a meddlesome family, which includes a rather large puppy.

The story of Dean and Anthony warmed my heart. There were a few places where the book was predictable, I’ve read enough Amy Lane to now always expect the worse to happen, but Cates has a gentler way of dealing with the angst. Sometimes she draws it out and it tugs at your heart strings, and sometimes your breath is taken away, but your confidence is quickly restored. The Guy from Glamour has a variety of twists and turns, but you can’t help from falling in love with the loquacious Anthony or the stolid and silent Dean, mostly because we get to read Dean’s thoughts and know that he’s just not used to expressing himself.

The book is also about a small town romance. I’ve lived in small towns all my life, and whereas, I haven’t yet found the love of my life, I do enjoy reading about those who do. I enjoy books that make me feel good, and this book made me feel great. I listened to it as an audiobook, as I often do on my drive to and from school, and the narration by Matt Baca was phenomenal. I had no trouble keeping up with who was who, which some readers are not as good at conveying. Also, usually I am content with listening only when I’m in the car, but I found myself continuing to listen once I got home and even listening some before I went to sleep at night.

The Guy from Glamour was a hit in my book. I loved it, and I can’t wait to read more from Skylar M Cates, who by the way, sounds like my kind of woman. In her author’s bio, she is described as a woman who “…loves a good romance. She is quite happy to drink some coffee, curl up with a good book, and not move all day.” Now that’s my kind of day!

Gay romance authors have one singular advantage over writers of straight romance, and that is the author has the ability to take the ideal man, split his characteristics up into two parts, add a few imperfections and come up with a perfect couple. Lane Hayes created such a couple in Better Than Chance, her sequel to Better Than Good. Jay Reynolds and Peter Morgan were introduced to the reader as a couple in the first book of Hayes’ “Better Than” series, but she didn’t delve much into their relationship. In Better Than Chance, we get to see how their relationship evolved:

Jay Reynolds has a crush on his project leader at work, but an office romance with Peter Morgan isn’t likely to happen since Peter is straight. Worse, Jay soon fears Peter is homophobic, and his initial infatuation turns to loathing. But one fateful night, Jay is forced to acknowledge things aren’t quite as they seem with Peter. Suddenly, his crush is back and unbelievably, Peter is interested too.

They begin a friends with benefits arrangement, which becomes difficult for Jay when he starts falling for his sexy boss. Peter’s past issues keep him from committing, and Jay has to decide if he can be satisfied with friendship if Peter isn’t ready to take a chance on anything more.

There’s something about the characters in Better Than Chance that makes you like them instantly. Jay and Peter are both beautiful, successful and they have great chemistry. This story is basically a beautiful ‘friends with benefits’ story, but with a twist because from the beginning of the book, you know that they become so much more than ‘friends with benefits’ since it takes place five years before Better Than Good when we meet Jay and Peter are a solid couple. Better Than Chance is not your usual romance, but the characters are just what I want in an ideal man.

I have to admit, I have a thing for well-dressed southern men. Jay is from Virginia, and Peter is from Georgia. Both are successful, intelligent, and handsome southern gentlemen. In many ways, I see a lot of myself in Peter, though I lack the successful job. However, his job is one in which he fights for what is right, which I think I do with teaching. He loves to cook and enjoys science fiction. He also has some of the same family issues that I have. It makes him come across as quiet and a bit gruff, but he doesn’t let anyone get too close. Jay, though, is comfortable in his own skin (at least outwardly); he has great friends; and he has a family that fully supports his sexuality. Basically, Jay is light, open, and proud, whereas, Peter is the quiet, dark brooding type.

Better Than Chance is told purely from Jay’s point of view, and therefore, Peter and all his hang ups are only seen through the eyes of one person which works really well for this story because Peter is a very complex person whose character unfolds slowly as the story progresses, and Jay finds this out as he tries to read Peter’s actions. Jay, of course, isn’t nearly as simple as he wants everyone to believe, and Peter often finds himself totally perplexed as he tries to understand Jay.

I highly recommend this book, even if you don’t read the first in the series, I think you can easily read this one, but whichever of the books you read first, you’ll want to read the other one. I can’t wait to read the third book in the “Better Than” series, Better Than Friends.

I hope my readers don’t mind my rash of book reviews lately. This tends to happen at times when I read several books in a row that I enjoy, and have the time to sit down and write a book review that will do justice for the book. I often don’t have time to read a lot, but lately I have been listening to audiobooks on the drive to and from school each day. I used to always listen to NPR. But sometimes you just need a break from the real world, and you desperately need an escape.

I just finished reading Lane Hayes’ first book in her “Better Than” series, Better Than Good. It’s a story of opposites, as the description states:

Matt Sullivan understands labels: law student, athlete, heterosexual. He has goals: graduate and begin his career in law. One fateful night, Matt tags along with his gay roommate to a dance club and everything changes. Matt finds himself attracted to the most beautiful man he’s ever seen. All labels go flying out the window.

Aaron Mendez doesn’t believe in labels, and he’s leery of straight curious men. He makes it clear that he’ll hide his fabulous light for no one. While Aaron can’t deny the attraction between him and Matt, he is reluctant to start anything with someone who is still dealing with what this new label means—especially when that someone has a girlfriend.

The premise may sound like a typical gay romance but it has certain twists, and I will admit that Better Than Good hit on a few of my pet peeves. Aaron is flamboyant, wears make-up, and adds an “ee” to everyone’s name, such as Matty for Matt. I really don’t have anything against flamboyant gay men, as I believe that we should all be who we are, and if that’s flamboyant then so be it. It’s no different from a hyper masculine man. Some people are just that way. I tend to think I’m a happy medium, but that’s a different issue. I will admit that I don’t quite understand men wearing make-up, but to each his own. My only real pet peeve though is when someone calls me Joey. My name is Joe, not Joey. So, in my own bias, it grated on my nerves each time I read Aaron calling Matt by the pet name of Matty.

With that being said, I have to tell you those were secondary things because the story is beautifully told. Hayes does a wonderful job at looking at our insecurities and struggles with decisions. Matt seems straight but not narrow when we first meet him, but Hayes gives us a good look at the fluidity of sexuality. One of the things I often find when reading female authors of M/M romance is that they are much more open to the fluidity of sexuality than male authors are. I also think it’s a more realistic look at sexuality. It’s not necessarily about a man going from heterosexual to homosexual over meeting one guy, but more that heterosexuality is so often seen as he “norm” by so many, that some men fail to look past the heteronormative perception we are often raised to believe.

While Matt isn’t your average “straight” guy, neither is Aaron your average gay man. Aaron seems not to have the insecurities that many gay men have, but a closer look shows this is a misconception. Aaron faces insecurities over his family relationships, especially with that of his father, and he’s reluctant to give a chance to a man he thinks is straight. On the surface, Aaron may seem like a carefree, young, out and proud gay man, but when we get to know him, we learn that he is much more complex.

The love story in Better Than Good is a slow sensuous story that will leave you wanting more. The conflict here was presented in a different manner than most M/M romances. Usually it’s the struggle of the “straight” man coming to terms with falling in love with a man. In Better Than Good, it is the gay man who has inhibition about dating a “straight” man, who has a girlfriend and is perceived to be heterosexuality. Matt’s character doesn’t have the central conflicts of most “straight” character, and readily admits that he is bisexual. This gives the story a new twist and makes the story a dynamic narrative which results in an romantic and happy conclusion.

Hayes’ working title for the book was All You Can Do is Try, which is a good motto for all of us, and it would have been a great title for Better Than Good, but I’m glad she changed the title and decided to expand the secondary characters of Jay and Peter into a second book in the “Better Than” series. I’ve already begun reading Better Than Chance, and I’m enjoying it even more than Better Than Good. It’s definitely a series that I suggest you read. Because this book was definitely better than good.

I’m willing to bet that at one point or another all of us have enjoyed watching porn, I know I have. I’d also bet that most of us wondered about the models’ lives outside of porn. When you hear or read about their lives in the news, it’s often tragic in some way: drug abuse, poverty, suicide, and the list goes on. However, we often put that in the back of our minds as we look at the beautiful models having sex on camera. However, a recent series of books has made me think about the porn industry a little more critically. That series is Amy Lane’s Johnnies series: Chase in Shadow, Dex in Blue, and Ethan in Gold.

Lane did a great deal of research for these books, which are about the models in a fictional gay adult video company called Johnnies. While the opening premise sounds incredibly hot and the sex scenes really are scorching hot, Amy Lane doesn’t disappoint with her moniker “Angst and Pain, Amy Lane.” However, the books weave together a wonderful story of the men who make up Johnnies, and the trials and tribulations they go through. Each has secrets to hide, and each needs Johnnies for various reasons. These were the fictional parts of her writing though she based each character on actual porn models. I always wondered how Lane wrote such erotic, and accurate, sexual encounters between two gay men, when she in fact is a happily married heterosexual woman.

First of all, Lane mainly based Johnoes on Corbin Fisher, which quite honestly has some of the most beautiful men in amateur gay porn. Her research also sounds a lot more fun than when I do research in a dusty library or archives (though I get a special joy out of doing that as well). And while Lane contacted Corbin Fisher with questions, they were never answered. So she watched lots of gay porn, but she did found herself not watching the the gay porn videos in the same way most of us would. Usually, we watch porn for one reason, but in this case, Lane spent many hours watching porn with other straight women, talking about what was real and what was directed. The “real” they were looking for wasn’t actual romantic feeling– it was more like working relationship feeling. Lane studied the sex scenes looking for eye contact, kissing, considerate touches, etc. all to understand the relationship between the models, not just to watch the fantasy they portrayed on the screen. Lane told me that researching the Johnnies books made her look at the nature of touch, pleasure, comfort, and love.

L to R: Connor/Chase, Dru/Dex, Aiden/Ethan, Travis/Tommy, Cain/Kane, Trey/Scott

In the books, Lane loosely based the characters (mostly appearance) of the Johnnies models on Corbin Fisher models. Chase is based on Connor, Dex on Dru, Ethan on Aiden. Those are the main one, but of course, there are many other models mentioned, such as Tommy who was based on Travis, Scott on Trey, and Kane on Cain. Those are the ones I have confirmed with Lane on who she based the characters on. I enjoy being able to put a face (and in this case a body as well) with the characters. Usually when I read a book, I picture the characters in my own head, but knowing in this case who they were based on made it all the more interesting. I want to add a side note here and say that I always pictured CF’s Dawson as Digger the older model who has been in many scenes over the years and is always affable and a steady model for the studio sticking around much longer than most models do. Of course there is the young (18 year old) new and very well-endowed new model Bobby who a friend of mine suggested might be CF’s Chandler, but I never have been able to figure out a corresponding model for.

When I finished these three books, I loved them, but I won’t deny that all three books are difficult books in the beginning. I don’t want to give anything away, but be warned. However, and you must keep this in mind, the books are worth getting past the difficult reading at the beginning. And when I say difficulty reading at the beginning, I’m not talking about difficult as in Robert Penn Warren’s All the King’s Men when page after page is about a car driving down a road. I mean difficult as in the subject matter. The first part of these books are a shock to your system, and whereas they are difficult subjects, you must read on so that you get the immense joy of reading an Amy Lane masterpiece.

Of the characters, I really loved Dex and Ethan the most. Dex is so together but with something to hide. I honestly, just want to give Ethan a hug, which I’ve got a feeling he’d like. Chase is the most flawed of the characters, but even with all his problems, you can’t help but feel for the guy and wish him the best. Dex though is the man that you want as a friend. He may not be perfect, but he will always be there for you. And when it comes to Ethan, well all I can say is that with all the Ethans I have known, they are sweet, lovable, intelligent, and you just want to wrap them in your arms and tell them that you’ll do anything to make their world a better place.

I adore Amy Lane’s books and I just want to thank her for the hours of enjoyment that her books have provided for me. Of course there are always a few tears involved, but it’s one of the things that makes her books great. It’s the full range of human emotions that she bring alive from the pages of her books. Thank you Amy Lane for the enjoyment you bring to so many and for touching our hearts.

Right now, my favorite author is Amy Lane. I’m finishing up the Promises Series, and will review them as soon as I finish the last one. It is not out in audiobook, so I actually have to find time to read it, instead of listening to it on my way to and from work. I love to read, but I rarely have time to stop and do so (at least not something fun). I’ve also started on the Johnnies Series. I just finished the first one and can’t wait to read the next. However, in between the Promises and Johnnies books, I read a sweet little Amy Lane book called Behind the Curtain. The last time I’d written about Amy Lane, I’d mentioned that the ending to Locker Room drove me crazy because it kind of left you hanging, and someone sent me a note that Behind the Curtain contained some closure. I fully admit, this was the main reason it made it to my next listen list. I’d had it in my wish list for a while, but it had been on the back burner as I planned to read other things. I need that closure though. So I read it. Here is the blurb for the book:

Dawson Barnes recognizes his world is very small and very charmed. Running his community college theater like a petty god, he and his best friend, Benji know they’ll succeed as stage techs after graduation. His father adores him, Benji would die for him, and Dawson never doubted the safety net of his family, even when life hit him below the belt.

But nothing prepared him for falling on Jared Emory’s head.

Aloof dance superstar Jared is a sweet, vulnerable man and Dawson’s life suits him like a fitted ballet slipper. They forge a long-distance romance from their love of the theater and the magic of Denny’s. At first it’s perfect: Dawson gets periodic visits and nookie from a gorgeous man who “gets” him—and Jared gets respite from the ultra-competitive world of dancing that almost consumed him.

That is until Jared shows up sick and desperate and Dawson finally sees the distance between them concealed painful things Jared kept inside. If he doesn’t grow up—and fast—his “superstar” might not survive his own weaknesses. That would be a shame, because the real, fragile Jared that Dawson sees behind the curtain is the person he can see spending his life with.

Amy Lane is known for her angst ridden books, and I have to admit, this one is low on the angst. I don’t believe I cried even once. This is not a bad thing. It was just a beautiful story. Furthermore, as the advisor for my schools drama club (I knew nothing about theater before being given the task), I found the technical aspects of being behind the curtain and the emotional aspects of being in front of the curtains very intriguing. I couldn’t identify with either aspect because I’ve never acted, and my little hundred year old stage doesn’t even have electricity (we use makeshift lights and extension cords, covering the lack of lights with onstage lamps and hiding the utility lights that we end up using). We are low tech in the extreme. But I think my little club does a fantastic job with what they have, and I do the best I can. I’ve even written a play for them next semester. But I’ve gotten off topic….

The book was heartwarming in many ways, and it had a little angst in there, just not much. Take a virgin gay boy who is cute but awkward and goofy and put him together with an absolutely beautiful superstar ballet dancer, plus their friends, and you have a wonderful cast of characters. Some characters you might not like at first until you get to know them, but by the end, you’ll love them all and root for each one.

There was one other reason why I fell in love with this book. I have a dear friend, who lives quite a ways away from me, who just graduated college in May and has been trying to find a job. He has a boyfriend and finding a job may take him away from his boyfriend if he has to move for the job. As much as it hurts, he and his boyfriend realize that for each of their careers, they may be separated for a little while. It breaks my heart because they wonder if their relationship is strong enough to survive a long-distance relationship. I firmly believe their love for each other is strong enough to pull them through. Honestly, they were made for each other, and I don’t want anything to pull them apart. I told my friend that he had to read this book. I don’t want to give it away, but it does show that while there are ups and downs in long-distance relationships, love and faith can keep them together. I hope when he does read this book, he will see that it can work.

You may think, “It’s just a book, Joe. It’s not real life.” However, as my friend, who also loves to read Amy Lane, pointed out to me recently, Amy Lane is a master of understanding the human psyche and emotions. Her understanding of human nature reminds me a lot of Shakespeare’s understanding of human nature. When I teach Shakespeare, I mention that one of the things that make him great is his mastery of the range of human emotions, the understanding of the human mind, and the nature of humanity. However, I sometimes find Shakespeare’s characters to be unreal, but I find Amy Lane’s characters to be very real in many way. Her characters are flawed, not as in a bad writer flawed kind of way, but in the way humans are flawed.

Amy Lane is a master when it comes to writing and character development. I just absolutely love her. I would love nothing more then to be able to just sit and talk with her for hours. Maybe she could even teach me to knit. Knitting is often a therapeutic exercise for some of her characters, and reading about knitting just makes me want to learn how. I see how much it helps her characters be calm and sometimes, I wish I could have that tranquility.