In the nearly eleven years I’ve lived in Vermont, I can count on one hand the number of true thunderstorms I’ve experienced. I don’t have enough hairs left on my head to count the number of thunderstorms I experienced growing up in the South. Alabama and Mississippi would receive more thunderstorms in a month than Vermont gets in a year.
That’s not to say it doesn’t rain in Vermont. In fact, there is rain in the forecast for the next ten days. The difference is that most Vermont rain tends to be light and steady rather than the dramatic downpours and thunderstorms common in the South.
Vermont actually holds the title of the cloudiest state east of the Mississippi River, averaging only about 58 days of full sunshine each year. Burlington is often compared to Seattle for its lack of completely clear days. There’s a reason so many Vermonters take vitamin D supplements.
Last night, however, we had a genuine thunderstorm. The thunder was loud enough to wake me around 11 p.m., and the lightning lit up my apartment. It took until nearly midnight for the storm to calm down enough for me to fall back asleep.
Even though the storm disturbed my sleep and Isabella woke me too early this morning, I at least don’t have to go into work. The floor cleaners are taking longer than expected, and the museum will be closed for the rest of the week. It may even extend into next week. So, I’ll continue working from home for a while longer.
Today will be another work-from-home day. The crew cleaning and waxing the floors at the museum are taking longer than expected, so we get to work from home again today. I have plenty to keep me busy, including finishing a few projects and preparing for a group of several dozen elementary school students who are scheduled to visit the museum on Thursday for a scavenger hunt.
Secretly, I’m hoping the cleaners need one more day and I won’t have to deal with a museum full of children. But I don’t usually have that kind of luck. Just in case, I did warn the organizers that there was a small possibility we might still be closed, however unlikely that seems to be.
Either way, I’ll be ready for whatever tomorrow brings.
The good thing about this Monday is that I don’t have to get ready for work. The museum is closed today and tomorrow for an annual cleaning, so I’ll be working from home both days before heading back to the office on Wednesday.
Since I can take things a little slower this morning, I got up, fed Isabella, and am writing this quick blog post before going back to bed for a little while. It’s nice to have a slower start to the week every now and then.
Usually, Fridays are my work-from-home days, but I switched my remote day to yesterday because my coworkers needed to be out this afternoon. So today, I’m at the museum instead. I don’t mind, though. It means I’ll have the museum to myself for most of the afternoon, and quite honestly, I like being the only one there. It’s quiet, peaceful, and a good opportunity to catch up on things without interruptions.
I also wanted to give everyone an update on Isabella. She seems to be doing great and, from all appearances, has forgiven me for yesterday’s trip to the veterinarian. She coughed a little this morning, but nothing like she had been, and she didn’t cough at all last night. I was so relieved to hear from the veterinarian that she is otherwise the picture of health. Thank goodness!
Hopefully, once she recovers from these asthma attacks, she’ll never have another one. But if she does, at least I know what to do, and we have a plan in place to help her. For now, I’m just grateful that she’s feeling better and that the visit brought such reassuring news.
This morning, like yesterday, I took some time to slow down before starting the day. After breakfast and coffee, I spent about thirty minutes meditating. I know today is going to be stressful because of a meeting I have later this morning, but I wanted to begin the day centered and calm rather than anxious and rushed.
The meeting will require me to strongly advocate for my point of view. That is not something that comes naturally to me. I can be outspoken when I need to be, but it is rarely comfortable. Thankfully, I know that at least one of my colleagues feels the same way I do, so I won’t be alone in making the case. My colleague is generally more outspoken than I am, and that support is reassuring.
For now, though, I feel relaxed, focused, and ready to tackle the day. My in-office workweek is already half over, and I hope the next two days pass without too much stress. One thing at a time.
I hope everyone has a wonderful day!
P.S. The photo above also reminded me of something. A few years ago, there is no way I could have comfortably sat like that. Since losing weight and becoming more active, I can. It may seem like a small thing, but sometimes the little changes are the ones that remind us how far we’ve come.
Today marks the beginning of June, a month that means many different things to many different people. For LGBTQ+ people, Pride Month is a time to celebrate who we are, to remember those who came before us, and to recognize how far we have come. It is also a reminder that the journey toward equality, dignity, and acceptance is not yet complete.
For me, Pride Month has never been about believing I am better than anyone else. It is about rejecting the shame that so many of us were taught to carry. It is about recognizing that we all deserve to live authentically and that there is nothing shameful about being who we are.
Pride Month is often about letting go of fear—the fear of rejection, the fear of judgment, the fear of being told that we are somehow less than who we truly are.
Pride Month is also a time to remember those who fought for the freedoms many of us enjoy today. It is a time to honor those who lived openly when doing so carried tremendous risks, and those who never had the opportunity to live openly at all.
As June begins, I hope this month will be one of joy, reflection, community, and love. Whether you attend a Pride event, fly a rainbow flag, spend time with friends, or simply take a moment to appreciate how far you’ve come on your own journey, I hope you find reasons to celebrate.
Last night turned into a later night than I had planned. Then, as usual, Isabella decided that breakfast absolutely could not wait and woke me up at 5:00 this morning. After feeding her, I intended to make coffee and start my day, but instead I crawled back into bed and promptly fell asleep again.
I do have my coffee now, but if I’m being honest, I’d still happily go back to sleep. Thankfully, it’s Friday, and I’m working from home today, so I can take things a little easier than usual.
The weekend is just around the corner, and I’m looking forward to a couple of days to relax and recharge. I hope all of you have a wonderful Friday and an even better weekend!
There are a few things I always notice about a man. If I’m behind him, it’s obviously his butt, but if I’m facing him, it’s usually his smile or his eyes before my gaze wanders any lower. I think that’s probably true for most of us, whether we admit it or not. I also pay attention to how a man dresses because I appreciate someone who takes pride in how he presents himself and carries himself. I’m not a fan of someone who looks sloppy or careless. I’ll notice his haircut too because even back when I had plenty of hair myself, I always appreciated a man with a good haircut.
Now, while I may lust after a handsome man for all the reasons above, those things alone are not what determine whether I’d want to pursue anything more—assuming he was even interested. What matters next is what comes out of his mouth. I’m attracted to intelligence, but not arrogance. I like warmth, kindness, and friendliness. I’m a shy person, especially when it comes to meeting men, and that’s probably a large part of why I’m still single. I’ve never been particularly good at making the first move or believing someone might actually be interested in me, so I tend to hold back more than I probably should. In some ways, that has become even more true since I lost weight. Even now, I still think people see the awkward overweight guy I used to be. There have been plenty of times when I’ve replayed an interaction in my head afterward and suddenly realized the guy was probably flirting with me and it went completely over my head at the time.
I’ll also admit that if a guy is attractive and friendly, but maybe not the sharpest tool in the shed, I’m perfectly capable of keeping things physical and nothing more—though I rarely go in that direction anymore. These days, I tend to be a bit more selective when it comes to intimate encounters.
With all that said, there is one thing that will always make me weak in the knees: a wink.
If a guy winks at me, I instinctively wink back, and there’s immediately a spark of attraction. Part of it is the confidence behind a wink. It takes a certain personality to do that—to create an instant connection between two people with nothing more than a look. A wink says, “We’re thinking the same thing,” but it also feels like sharing a secret, no matter how small or insignificant that secret might be.
I’m not entirely sure why a wink affects me so much, but I suspect it has something to do with the kinds of guys I was attracted to back in high school, long before I ever allowed myself to admit I was gay. The boys I tended to like had a certain bravado, but they were also friendly. They didn’t immediately look at me and think, “He’s a fag,” and treat me like someone beneath them or someone to avoid. Instead, they saw a nice guy—someone smart, maybe a little awkward and shy, but always kind.
They also tended to be protective of me.
I was picked on a lot in school, mostly because people perceived me as gay, which is probably another reason it took me so long to admit my sexuality to myself. I didn’t want to be the thing everyone mocked or treated as something shameful. It took me a long time to get past that and allow myself to simply be who I was. Even after I came out to most people, it still took me a long time to feel comfortable enough to fully be myself.
When someone bullied me, these guys would often step in. Sometimes it was subtle; other times, it definitely wasn’t. They might throw an insult right back at the bully or shut them down with a joke. And often, after doing it, they’d give me that wink.
It was their way of saying, “I’ve got your back.”
I think most of us can agree on how a man’s physical appearance can affect us, but I’m curious: what is the one thing that always makes you weak in the knees?
I woke up this morning, fed Isabella, and then realized something wonderful—it’s a holiday, and I can go right back to bed. There are few better feelings than knowing you can pull the covers back up, settle in, and drift off for a little while longer without worrying about work.
So that’s exactly what I plan to do.
I hope everyone has a relaxing and peaceful Memorial Day, whether you’re spending it with family, grilling outside, traveling, or simply enjoying a quiet day at home. And today, we should also remember the men and women who gave their lives in service to this country and the sacrifices they made.
As for me and Isabella, we’ll be celebrating the holiday with more sleep.
I’m working from home this morning and then have the afternoon off. Because of that, when Isabella decided at 4 a.m. that she absolutely needed breakfast, I got up to feed her and then crawled right back into bed. Since that completely disrupted my normal routine, I almost forgot to write a post this morning. Thankfully, I remembered before the coffee had fully kicked in.
Hopefully, today will be easy and go smoothly. I have a few errands to run this afternoon, and then I plan to settle into a relaxing weekend. At least, that’s the hope.
For those of you outside the United States, you may not realize that this is a major holiday weekend here. Monday is Memorial Day, which means this weekend is generally considered the unofficial beginning of summer. Of course, you wouldn’t know that from the weather in Vermont. We’re under a freeze warning this morning. While people in warmer places are probably headed to the beach or the lake, I’m sitting here with coffee wondering if I should turn the heat back on.
I do wish I was headed somewhere exciting, but my only possible plans are to see The Mandalorian & Grogu, which opens in theaters today. I don’t go to the movies very often anymore, but I really enjoyed The Mandalorian, and I’d like to see the movie. Then again, holiday weekends usually mean crowded theaters, so I may wait and see how ambitious I feel.
My other thought—though not a particularly serious one—was going to the Burly Bears gathering tonight in Burlington. It’s one of the few gay men-centered social events in Vermont and takes place at one of the bars there. Every month has a different theme, and tonight’s is “007,” so it’s all James Bond-inspired. If I had a really great suit—or better yet, a tuxedo—I might actually consider going. Unfortunately, I haven’t bought a new suit since losing weight, and I don’t really want to invest in one until I’m certain my weight has stabilized or unless I suddenly need one for a job interview. So, James Bond sophistication may have to wait.
If you’re in the United States, do you have any Memorial Day weekend plans? And for everyone else, what are your plans for the weekend?
Whatever you do—or don’t do—I hope you have a wonderful weekend!
The Closet Professor 