Category Archives: Politics

Coming Out to My Parents

Most of the text of this post come from my Father’s Day post on Cocks, Asses, and More.  However, parts of this post are relevant to my Coming Out series and also to the last of my poetic posts that I will have up tomorrow.

I know there are at least a few dads out there who read my blog, so I also wanted to tell you about my father.  Just like mothers, fathers can drive us crazy.  Most of us may not have been as close to our fathers as maybe we should have been or should be, but all of us have a father somewhere. 

We are very different in so many ways.  He is very outdoorsy: he hunts, he fishes, and constantly works outdoors.  I was always a bookworm, who liked books better than sports.  I’ve learned to like the outdoors:  I walk nature trails, I like to hike, and I even like to fish occasionally.  Whereas my father worked outside all his life, I prefer to work inside, research, writing, teaching, etc.  There are a lot of other differences as well.  We can generally have a conversation for about 15-20 minutes before we get into some type of argument.  My father has never felt I was right about anything.  I can be agreeing with him, and he will fuss at me for agreeing with him.  No matter what I say, he will say the opposite.  The other day, I made a remark about a house being painted white (it used to be gray), he argued with me that the house was painted gray, just a lighter shade.  Everyone else I know says the house is white, but he still says that it is gray.  It’s that sort of thing that drives me crazy.  Needless to day, we barely get along.  I love him nonetheless, I just don’t like him sometimes.  He can be very cruel and frustrating.

To switch gears a little bit, I want to tell you also how great my father can be, without me ever knowing it.  This is part of the reason that I forgive so much of the misery he causes me.  When my parents found out I was gay, it was a very traumatic experience for all concerned.  My mother had suspected for quite a while and was being very nosy.  She checked my email.  She didn’t like some of the emails that she saw.  Most of them, if not all, were fairly innocent, but there were some like an ad from Showtime about “Queer as Folk” and maybe another one from gay.com. I was over at my grandmother’s checking on her, when my mother called me and confronted me about it.  I was tired of denying it.  All of my friends knew, so why shouldn’t she.  I knew she wouldn’t like it.  She had confronted me several years before about it, and I denied it then.  I wasn’t ready, and to make sure that I never was, my mother told me, “If you would rather have a dick up my ass, then be part of this family, then get the hell out and go ahead and leave.  We will have nothing more to do with me.”  When this time came around, we got into a huge argument.  I yelled, she yelled, and I left.  I was still dependent on them for some things, but I could live without them.  My mother went to bed and cried for the next two weeks.  BTW, this all happened two days before Christmas, while I was home on Christmas break.  We still went to all the Christmas events with our family, but I refused to talk to my mother.  When my father got home the day all this happened, he talked to my mother about what was wrong.  She told him.  She tells him everything. This was one of the times when he sided with me.

He told my mother, that I was their child.  She could not stop loving me, just because she did not agree with my lifestyle. He would continue to love me, and she would have to do the same.  No matter what his children did, they would still love them (it may have helped that my sister married a complete and total jackass, who doesn’t physically abuse her, but abuses her mentally).  Then he  came and talked with me.  He told me that he didn’t care what I told my mother, but to tell her something or she would die in that bed in there (you don’t know my mother, but she would have).  Then he told me what surprised me the most, “I should have taught you how to fight the urges.  I am sorry that I failed you.”  It is the only time my father ever apologized to me for anything.  I never asked about the urges, but I am pretty sure I know what he was talking about.  He knew exactly how I felt.  He had been there himself, but he had chosen a different path.  Maybe that is why they still believe it is a choice.  But I see the misery in him almost everyday.  I went to my parents and told them both that I was celibate and would remain that way, and I had never acted on my sexuality (yes it was a lie, but it was one I think was and still is for the better).  They made me promise that I would not tell anyone else in the family, and I have agreed to that. Our family has become a “Don’t ask, don’t tell, don’t discuss” Zone.  It is not my preference but it is what I must deal with for the time being.  If I ever find a man to live my life with, I will deal with the other consequences then.  I don’t think I could hide from my family the love of my life (if he ever comes along).

They still consider my being gay a lifestyle choice, I never will.  I would have never chosen this myself.  I would have chosen to live a more open life, but that is mostly not possible where I live now, and especially not with my job.  But I know what makes me happy, and after a lot of prayer and meditation, God told me that love is what matters most in this world.  I came to understand that if I lived a lie and married a woman, I would make her and my life miserable (somewhat like my father has).  If I was going to be alone, then I would be alone. At least I wouldn’t be hurting someone else.  I realize that some people had more pressures to get married and have a family and come out later in life.  I do not fault them for that, it was a different time and different circumstances.  But in this day and age, I felt I could not lie to myself or anyone else and spend a large portion of my life as a lie.

I had been thinking of posting this on this blog for a few days now, but something happened today that really pissed me off and I was forced to just shrug it off.  If I calm down enough to write about it in a sensible way, I will.  I will say this though, discrimination, small town attitudes, and fucked up conservative values are a pain in the ass.  I will never understand why a person who is a good person (which I most certainly am, I strive everyday to treat people they way I want to be treated, even if they don’t always treat me that way).  We should all accept people for who they are and what they are.  See them as a person, not a label.


Equality California Hails Historic Federal Court Decision to Overturn Prop. 8

Federal court deems marriage ban unconstitutional

San Francisco, California –Today the U.S. federal district court overturned Proposition 8 on the grounds that the ban prohibiting same-sex couples from marrying is unconstitutional. The case now moves to the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals.

In response to the ruling, Geoff Kors, executive director for Equality California, which filed an amicus brief supporting the Prop. 8 federal challenge, issued the following statement:

“We are thrilled with today’s ruling, which affirms that the protections enshrined in our U.S. Constitution apply to all Americans and that our dream of equality and freedom deserves protection. Judge Walker has preserved our democracy by ruling that a majority cannot deny a minority group of fundamental freedoms. This is as much a victory for the soul of our nation as it is for the thousands of same-sex couples and their families who will be directly impacted.

“We are truly indebted to Ted Olson and David Boies and to the American Foundation for Equal Rights. We owe Governor Schwarzenegger and Attorney General Jerry Brown a great deal of gratitude for their unprecedented decision not to defend this discriminatory measure. While this is a great success, we also know that the road to restore the freedom to marry could be a long one and that we must do everything in our power to protect this incredible victory. Equality California will do its part by working to elect a governor and attorney general this fall who refuse to spend tax-payer dollars to overturn this decision. We are also ready to battle the National Organization for Marriage this fall to keep their toxic agenda out of our state.

“Finally, together with thousands of volunteers we will keep sharing our stories in communities throughout California so that we continue building public support for the freedom to marry, which is essential to permanently restoring marriage equality in California.”

This was originally posted on WichedGayBlog.com.  However, one of the things I wanted to be able to do on this blog was to do political posts, and I thought this was a good time to start.  I don’t live in California, so I really don’t think I can adequately speak for the ruling today about Prop 8.  I do think it is a step in the right direction, but I do not hold a great deal of faith in where this will ultimately end up, i.e. the US Supreme Court.  I hope that I am underestimating the Supreme Court.


Abraham Lincoln, Gay???

LINCOLN nude final(1)
If you want just my opinion on this controversial issue, this would be a very short post, because I don’t think he was gay.  However, there is a lot of controversy over this issue, and I thought I would give a closer look for you guys.  I know I mostly have discussed Ancient History on The Closet Professor, but since modern history is much closer to my field of study, I thought it was time to show you that I know more than just sex in the ancient world.
So what brought about this discussion of more modern history?  Well, I recently came across this review of a play in the New York Times:

91 (2)Plot Description for Abraham Lincoln’s Big, Gay Dance Party

A fourth-grade Christmas pageant in Abraham Lincoln’s rural Illinois hometown sets off a firestorm of controversy when it calls into question Abraham Lincoln’s sexuality. Each of the play’s three acts lets the audience see the story through a different character’s viewpoint — and at each performance the audience decides in which order the acts are performed, creating a Rubik’s-like theatrical event. Finally, a truly democratic theatergoing experience! What could be more American than that? 
The sexuality of Abraham Lincoln is a subject that is laced with many discrepancies and historical flaws.  GayLincoln The notion that Lincoln was a homosexual also portrays nearly perfectly two of my major pet peeves with historians.  First, much of the argument is taken out of its historical context, and second, the authors who expound on this notion have no historical objectivity.  I will explain these two pet peeves of mine as I relate the supposed homosexuality of Abraham Lincoln.  Mostly, I will explain what is wrong with the theories of Lincoln’s homosexuality.  If you are not familiar with the arguments concerning Lincoln’s homosexuality, please read the suggested readings below first.  I am including them before my argument because as I was writing this, I realized that it was quite long already, and I decided to let the actual discussion of Lincoln’s homosexuality to be in these articles, while most of this post will be mainly a refutation of The Intimate World of Abraham Lincoln by C. A. Tripp.
gay Suggested Readings:
6a00d8341c730253ef00e54f3297c08833-640wi In The Intimate World of Abraham Lincoln, C. A. Tripp contends that Lincoln had erotic attractions and attachments to men throughout his life, from his youth to his presidency. He further argues that Lincoln’s relationships with women were either invented by biographers (his love of Ann Rutledge) or were desolate botches (his courtship of Mary Owens and his marriage to Mary Todd). Tripp is not the first to argue that Lincoln was homosexual — earlier writers have parsed his friendship with Joshua Speed, the young store owner he lived with after moving to Springfield, Ill. — but he assembles a mass of evidence and tries to make sense of it.
image  Tripp died in May 2003, after finishing the manuscript of this book, which means he never had a chance to fix its flaws. Tripp alternates shrewd guesses and modest judgments with bluster and fantasy. He drags in references to Alfred Kinsey (with whom he once worked) to give his arguments a (spurious) scientific sheen. And he has an ax to grind. Not only did he work with Kinsey, but Tripp was a well-known gay activist and psychologist.  By the way, psychologists who write psycho-history are often the worst type of historians.  They have very little understanding of the craft and they use their knowledge of psychology to interpret historical data.  The same goes for most journalists, who do not have the same standards as historians when it comes to citing their sources. Psychologists who write history too often apply Freudian and Jungian psychology to people who had never had any knowledge of this type of psychoanalyzing. 
In the after math of the Franco-Prussian War in Europe (1870-71), Carl von Clauswitz wrote the military strategy book On War.  Military historians after the publication of On War are able to compare Clauswitz theories to modern warfare because it influenced modern generals and military strategists.  Likewise, the psychological theories of Freud and Jung and the perverted misunderstanding of Einstein’s Theory of Relativity (“everything is relative,” not just E = mc2, as Einstein meant it) greatly influenced 20th century writers, who used this knowledge to form their characters and plot devises. I mention these two instances of influencing theories because Tripp uses modern homosexual behavior to explain Lincoln relationships with men.  He takes the notion out of its historical context. 
image  Intimacy between men was much more common and less sexually laced in the 19th century than it was in the later part of the 20th century.  In 19th century America men commonly slept with other men. For example, when lawyers and judges traveled “the circuit” with Lincoln, the lawyers often slept “two in a bed and eight in a room.”  William H. Herndon recalled, “I have slept with 20 men in the same room.”  A tabulation of historical sources shows that Lincoln slept with at least 11 boys and men during his youth and adulthood. There are no known instances in which Lincoln tried to suppress knowledge or discussion of such arrangements, and in some conversations, raised the subject himself. Tripp, who was not aware of this large number of Lincoln’s male co-sleepers, discusses only three of them at length: Joshua Speed, William Greene, and Charles Derickson.

image

Joshua Speed

abrahamlincoln5-500Tripp and other gay activists have an agenda to prove Lincoln’s homosexuality.  He is seen as the father of the Republican Party, an American political party known for its many anti-gay members and platforms.  Their objectivity is shot to hell because they are not attempting to give their readers an intimate look at the private life of Abraham Lincoln, but to discredit the Republican Party.  For me, this takes away much of the credibility of advocates of Lincoln’s homosexuality.  I am no fan of the Republican Party.  I largely find the modern Republican Party to be defined by what it hates and not what it is for; however, the same could be said for the Democratic Party.  American politics is a divisive politics of hate.  If someone writing history is blinded by that hate, they cannot see the error of their historical argument.  They apply modern interpretations to situations that do not warrant modernity.  Yes, the Civil War in America, the mid-19th century was a turning point in the history of America.  It is a period of transitioning from the early republic to the modern era.  Yet, this transition was not even complete by 1877 when Reconstruction ended.  Therefore, modern interpretations of events are null and void.
I love nothing more than a great historical figure to be homosexual.  We have some great ones and some evil ones.  However, I find it very hard to believe that Lincoln was homosexual.  You are more than welcome to disagree with me if you like (that is, if anyone is actually reading this).  Please leave your comments in the comment section or email me directly.


Chinese Eunuchs

imageIn China, male castration of a person who entered the caste of eunuchs during imperial times involved the removal of the whole genitalia, that is, the removal of the testes, penis, and scrotum. The removed organs were returned to the eunuch to be interred with him when he died so that, upon rebirth, he could become a whole man again. The penis, testicles and scrotum were euphemistically termed bǎo (寶) in Mandarin Chinese, which literally means ‘precious treasure’. These were preserved in alcohol and kept in a pottery jar by the eunuch. In China the practice of using castrated men as guardians of the emperor’s Inner court began over 2,000 years ago. Aside from the emperor, eunuchs were generally the only men allowed in the inner courtyards of the palace, where the women and harem lived.
Famous Chinese Eunuchs
image Cheng Ho, or Zheng He, was born in Kunyang, Yunnan province, China, in 1371. He was captured and sent to the Chinese army in 1382 where he helped Chu Ti become Emperor Yonglo of the Ming Dynasty. In thanks, he was made Grand Imperial Eunuch and his name was changed to Zheng He. He headed a series of naval expeditions all over the Indian Ocean. Zheng had diplomatic, scientific, and commercial goals, while travelling farther than any other admiral in history at the time. He visited more than 35 countries during his voyages. Zheng took more than 100 ships and about 28,000 men in his Grand Fleet. The largest vessels were longer than all of Columbus’ ships put end to end. By the seventh and last voyage, Zheng had been to east Africa, the Persian Gulf, Egypt, and Ceylon. He set up diplomatic relations in all the countries he visited and received tribute. When in Ceylon, Zheng helped restore the legitimate ruler to the throne. In Indonesia, the fleet defeated a powerful Chinese pirate who was later brought back to China for execution. Zheng’s voyages not only established Chinese trade routes throughout Asia and Africa, but also established China as the dominant power and most technologically advanced culture in the known world. He died during a trip home from India and China banned all further expeditions.
image Li Lianyang accumulated vast influence as the, favorite eunuch of the Empress Dowager Cixi, who climbed from a concubine third-grade to become ruler of China for 40 years in the.19th century. Li headed an Imperial staff of thousands of cooks, gardeners, laundrymen, cleaners, painters and other eunuchs, who were classified in a complex hierarchy of 48 separate grades. Though eunuchs were generally illiterate, Li Lianyang, could read enough to wield influence over officials.
image Sun Yaoting was China’s last imperial eunuch died at 93 in 1996 in a Beijing temple after a life spanning the end of an dynasty and a Communist revolution. Only months after his family had him castrated in1911, the Manchu Dynasty, which had ruled China since the early 1660s was overthrown. Mr. Sun continued to serve Pu-Yi, for a decade. The parts removed, called the ‘precious,’ are prepared and kept in common pint jars, hermetically sealed, and placed on a high shelf. Should a eunuch be promoted he has to show the ‘precious’ to the chief eunuch or he cannot obtain his rank. When he dies, they are placed in the coffin and buried with him, because he wishes to be as complete as possible when departing into another world to allow reincarnation as a whole man. During the Cultural Revolution, Mr. Sun’s family destroyed his ‘precious’.


Two-Spirit, The American Third Sex

George Catlin (1796-1872), Dance to the Berdache.

Catlin_-_Dance_to_the_berdacheDrawn while on the Great Plains, among the Sac and Fox Indians, the sketch depicts a ceremonial dance to celebrate the two-spirit person.
pic-25 Gay Native Americans call themselves Two-Spirits and have historically been considered a third sex, though they did not suffer castration, which was not common in the Americas.  Two-Spirit People is an English term that emerged in 1990, out of the third annual inter-tribal Native American/First Nations gay and lesbian conference, in Winnipeg, to describe Native Americans who fulfill one of many mixed gender roles found traditionally among many Native Americans and Canadian First Nations indigenous groups. The mixed gender roles encompassed by the term historically included wearing the clothing and performing the work associated with both men and women.
 pic-17A direct translation of the Ojibwe term, Niizh manidoowag, “two-spirited” or “two-spirit” is usually used to indicate a person whose body simultaneously houses a masculine spirit and a feminine spirit. The term can also be used more abstractly, to indicate presence of two contrasting human spirits (such as Warrior and Clan Mother) or two contrasting animal spirits (which, depending on the culture, might be Eagle and Coyote); however, these uses, while descriptive of some aboriginal cultural practices and beliefs, depart somewhat from the 1990 purposes of promoting the term.
Prior to western contact, many American Native tribes had third-gender roles. These include “Berdaches” (a derogatory French term for genetic males who assumed a feminine role) and “Passing women” (genetic females who took on a masculine role). The term Berdache in not a Native American word; rather it was a European definition covering a range of third-gender people in different tribes. Not all Native American tribes had Transgender people.
pic-07 These individuals are often viewed as having two spirits occupying one body. Their dress is usually a mixture of traditionally male and traditionally female articles. They have distinct gender and social roles in their tribes.
alan-valdez-hispanic-native-americanTwo-spirited individuals perform specific social functions in their communities. In some tribes male-bodied two-spirits held active roles such as: healers or medicine persons, gravediggers, undertakers, handling and burying of the deceased, conduct mourning and sexual rites, conveyers of oral traditions and songs, nurses during war expeditions, foretold the future, conferred lucky names on children or adults, wove, made pottery, made beadwork and quillwork, arranged marriages, made feather regalia for dances, special skills in games of chance, led scalp-dances, and fulfilled special functions in connection with the setting up of the central post for the Sun Dance.
pic-24 In some tribes female-bodied two-spirits typically took on roles such as: chief, council, trader, hunter, trapper, fisher, warrior, raider, guides, peace missions, vision quests, prophets, and medicine persons.
native-american-i-dan-nelson Two-spirit people, specifically male-bodied (biologically male, gender female), could go to war and have access to male activities such as sweat lodges. However, they also took on female roles such as cooking and other domestic responsibilities. It is obvious from the list above that Two-Spirits carried out many of the most important tasks of the tribes.
For more information about Two-Spirits, please visit TWO SPIRIT: GBLT INDIAN NATION.  It is a very interesting article.

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Twospirit