Monthly Archives: January 2014

Lift Your Eyes To the Hills

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A Song of Ascents. I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand. The sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
Psalm 121

We all travel at some points in our lives, and a prayer for when we travel is important to be sure God knows we want His hand in our vacation, trip or in any journey in which we travel. We all may be good enough in our driving, much aware that there are important travel safety tips we can follow to protect ourselves away from home, but one of the most important is to pray for God to be with us.

Life itself is often a challenging, dangerous journey, with no clear idea what is over the hill in front of you. You “lift your eyes unto the hills” and ask from where will help come. We will all need help and courage in getting over those hills and this can only be fulfilled with the grace of God.

Only The Lord can direct the steps and can provide peace throughout the trip. I know whenever am away from home there are some people back home praying the whole time for my return. For all of my family members, relatives and friends I would express my humble thanks, and request to pray for my journey of life as well. One thing I have gotten to know is the point that no matter where you go and whatever you might experience, God is always their watching over you. May god watch over me this week! and may he watch over all of us in our travels through life.


Moment of Zen: Cruising

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I’m leaving in just a few hours to head to a friend’s house in Louisiana, from where we will leave to go to New Orleans to board the Carnival Sunshine on Sunday. I’m so excited!

P.S. I will not have readily available Internet access until I return home Monday, January 20th. Please do continue to comment, as I should be able to receive email until the ship reaches he Gulf of Mexico Sunday night. However, I will not be able to respond, but I promise that I will read each and every comment and email upon my return.


The Key to Success

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Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.
Albert Schweitzer

The way to success with me is for a man to have a hairy chest like this guy, though a smooth or lightly hairy chest is nice also. All joking aside, do what makes you happy. With everything that’s been going on with my aunt and with HRH the last few weeks, I need a little happiness. I will be even more happy if I can bring a healthy HRH home from the vet today. I’ve missed her terribly, and I will miss her next week, but she will be in good hands while I’m gone. However, no matter what, I expect to find some happiness while I’m on my cruise next week.


AndrewChristian.com’s Poor Customer Service

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For many years, I have always tried to support LGBT and LGBT-friendly businesses. One of those companies is 10percent.com, which started out giving 10 percent of all their profits to LGBT organizations and charities. I also frequent Starbucks when I can, since they are very LGBT-friendly. Amazon.com is another LGBT-friendly business that I use a lot. Another company that I have enjoyed being a patron of is AndrewChristian.com. However, I am beginning to change my mind.

I love Andrew Christian products and have never been dissatisfied with anything I have received, but I have to admit that I have been disappointed with how long it takes for an item to ship and whether or not the products actually are shipped. I was especially disappointed in my latest order because I will be leaving for a cruise in 3 days and believed that I had ordered a swimsuit in plenty of time for it to arrive to take on the cruise, since I placed the order on December 29. Two weeks should have been plenty of time, especially since I could have ordered it from Amazon and been guaranteed 2-day or overnight shipping. This is quite frustrating as I have sent one email to AndrewChristian.com previously, nearly a week ago, and have not received any response, and after sending another email, and as of the time I’m writing this, I still have not received a response.

The thing is, it’s more than just a swimsuit order. I received a shipping notification of two of the items I ordered, a pair of underwear and a bracelet I though would look cool to wear on the cruise. Since they were an incredible price on sale, I was supposed to get all three items for $20, which included shipping. The shipping notification showed that I had been charged for the two previously mentioned items and the swimsuit. However, it was not shown to have been shipped. AndrewChrisitan.com’s policy is that you are not charged until the item ships. Since I had been charged, I hoped that e swimsuit would be included in the order. When the package arrived yesterday, the swimsuit was not included in the shipment that I received, even though my order is marked as complete when I checked my account on the Andrew Christian website. I checked my bank account, and I was charged for all three items. As I previously stated, I wrote AndrewChrisitan.com’s customer service and still no response.

I would not be as bothered by this if it was the first time that my order had not been fulfilled correctly. This is the second order that I have placed with AndrewChristian.com in which only a partial shipment of the order was filled, and the other items never shipped, though they are still for sale on the website. The previous order was placed a month before. However, in the case of the earlier order, I was not charged for the items that did not ship, as I have been this time.

I am a loyal supporter of LGBT businesses, and as previously stated I am a fan of Andrew Christian products, but I’ve just been so disappointed in the poor customer service. I have often recommended Andrew Christian products, but the quality of the products doesn’t really matter, if the quality of service is so poor. No matter how sexy the models (see above picture) or the hotness of their videos, I feel that I can’t trust AndrewChristian.com enough to order from them again. Since I have had this problem, I wanted to write this post to warn my readers that if you have been contemplating ordering from AndrewChristian.com, I would suggest that you don’t. The customer service is very poor; the reliability is nearly non-existent; and the communication is absent between the business and the consumer. If you decide to order anyway, do so at your own risk. I, for one, will not be ordering from the Andrew Christian website again.

Below is the Andrew Christian Guarantee, do not believe it. The truth is, it’s not “that simple” because Customer Service at AndrewChristian.com won’t communicate with you.

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UPDATE: Though it is too late to order a new swimsuit before the cruise and over a week after I sent the first email (not to mention blogging and tweeting about it), I finally received the following response from a Customer Service Representative of AndrewChristian.com.

I am very sorry that this happened.
We appear to be out of stock on these items. I have refunded you $**.** for the latest order. For order [previous order #], you received store credit accessible on the checkout page of your AC account. We are restocking items and have great new items now available on the website as well as a great promotion. We hope you will stick with us. We certainly appreciate your orders.

By the way, I tried to use the store credit from the previous order when I checked out for my latest order and it refused to process it. I have to admit, I’m still not entirely satisfied. Shipping is too slow and customer service is slow to respond to emails.


Congratulations Lily and Jane!

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Lily Tomlin and longtime girlfriend Jane Wagner married on New Year’s Eve after 43 years together. News that the 74-year-old actress exchanged vows with Wagner came in the form of an online post from Chicago Tribune writer Liz Smith, a close friend of the couple.

“[M]y longtime friends, Lily Tomlin and her love, the writer Jane Wagner, got married on the eve of 2014… My wish is that their happiness will be as great as their combined talents,” Smith wrote.

Wagner, a writer, worked with Tomlin on numerous projects, including the actress’ Tony Award-winning one-woman Broadway show “The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe” and 1981 movie “The Incredible Shrinking Woman.”

Back in August Tomlin told E! News that she originally had no plans on getting married, but once same-sex marriage was legalized she had a change of heart.

“Jane and I have been together for 42 years. We’re thinking maybe we’ll get married. You don’t really need to get married, but marriage is awfully nice,” she said. “Everybody I know who got married, they say it really makes a difference. They feel very, very happy about it.”

Tomlin met her partner Jane Wagner in March 1971. After watching an after-school special written by Wagner, J.T., Tomlin invited her to Los Angeles to collaborate on the comedy album And That’s The Truth. The couple had no formal coming out, Tomlin said in 2006:

I certainly never called a press conference or anything like that. [Back in the ’70s,] people didn’t write about it. Even if they knew, they would [refer to Jane as] “Lily’s collaborator,” things like that. Some journalists are just motivated by their own sense of what they want to say or what they feel comfortable saying or writing about. In ’77, I was on the cover of Time. The same week I had a big story in Newsweek. In one of the magazines it says I live alone, and the other magazine said I live with Jane Wagner. Unless you were so really adamantly out, and had made some declaration at some press conference, people back then didn’t write about your relationship. … In ’75 I was making the Modern Scream album, and Jane and I were in the studio. My publicist called me and said, “Time will give you the cover if you’ll come out.” I was more offended than anything that they thought we’d make a deal. But that was ’75 — it would have been a hard thing to do at that time.
Tomlin stated in 2008, “Everybody in the industry was certainly aware of my sexuality and of Jane…in interviews I always reference Jane and talk about Jane, but they don’t always write about it.”

Tomlin has been involved in a number of feminist and gay-friendly film productions, and on her 1975 album Modern Scream she poked fun at straight actors who make a point of distancing themselves from their gay and lesbian characters—answering the pseudo-interview question, she replied: “How did it feel to play a heterosexual? I’ve seen these women all my life, I know how they walk, I know how they talk …”

Though there are many Lily Tomlin roles that I remember and love, I will always think first of her as Edith Ann, one of her many famous characters. I probably remember that character because Country’s Barbecue in Montgomery, Alabama, had a huge red rocking chair that kids, including me, used to love to sit in and feel like Edith Ann, or at least I felt like Edith Ann, everyone else may have just thought of it as a big chair.

Edith Ann character is a precocious five-and-a-half year old girl who waxes philosophical on everyday life, either about life as a kid or things for which she feels she has the answers although she is too young to fully understand. She often ends her monologues with “And that’s the truth,” punctuating it with a noisy raspberry. Edith Ann sits in an over-sized rocking chair (to make Tomlin seem child-sized) with her rag doll, Doris, and often talks of life at home with her battling parents and bullying older sister, Mary Jean (Lily Tomlin’s actual first names). Edith Ann has an over-sized, playfully aggressive dog named Buster and a boyfriend named Junior Phillips, a possibly unrequited love.

One of my favorite Edith Ann quotes:

I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.
~ Lily Tomlin Quotes, As Edith Ann

A QUICK UPDATE: my aunt’s doctor told our family that she was finally seeing some improvement with the lung x-rays. My aunt’s H1N1 flu and the pneumonia have cleared up, and though she isn’t out of the woods yet, there are definite sign of improvement. Furthermore, I talked to HRH’s vet yesterday afternoon. He said that she was doing well, and they are still working on getting fluids in her so that they can tap her bladder and send it off for analysis. Thank you all for your prayers, kindness, and words of encouragement. Neither are in the clear yet, but things, hopefully, will continue looking up. So please continue to keep us in your prayers.


In Need of Your Prayers

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7

I can’t help but be anxious at the moment, and I fear my prayers alone will not be enough. I am asking for your prayers as well. My aunt who has been in the hospital for weeks with ARDS has been having improvements and setbacks. Her health has been a bit of a roller coaster, and I’m not sure how things are going to end up. My mother and the rest of my aunt’s immediate family are being called in this afternoon at 2:30 to speak with the doctor. We do not know if this is good news, bad news, or no news at all. All we can do is pray and hope that my aunt will either respond to the treatments better or they have a better treatment to offer. I just don’t know, so I need your prayers.

HRH also desperately needs your prayers. I just returned from another vet visit. She has not been able to urinate at all, so I called the vet last night and he said to bring her in first thing this morning. Because she is female it is unlikely that she has blockage which could be fatal (that mostly occurs with males). They were able to get some urine (and sorry if this is TMI), and found no red blood cells, though way too many white blood cells. The infection has not responded to the treatments or antibiotics she has received. Therefore, he feels he needs to be more aggressive and run more tests. The two good things are that there is no visible tumor in the bladder or red blood cells in the urine, which most likely rules out cancer (though not completely because a tumor might be flat and surrounding the bladder). He will give her IV fluids to help flush out her bladder and inject her with antibiotics. Once they can fill the bladder, they will draw urine directly from the bladder to get an us contaminated sample to send off (hopefully to Auburn University, one of the nation’s best veterinarian schools) to be further tested. The vet’s office will be keeping her for these more aggressive treatments probably until Friday.

If I weren’t leaving on my cruise this weekend, I might could rest a little easier, but I hate to be gone a week while my aunt’s condition is still so uncertain and while HRH is so sick. I’m desperately praying for improvements from both so I won’t worry so much when I am gone. I am a worrier, and I can’t help but be anxious. It is taken everything in me not to burst into tears. I nearly did so in front of the vet today (though I did when I got back in my car), and then again when I talked to my mother about my aunt. Therefore, I am praying, and I ask that you pray with me.

In the early 20th century, Florence Nightingale, a pioneer of modern nursing, was a believer in the effects of prayer. She wrote, “Often when people seem unconscious, a word of prayer reaches them.” Though studies have often been inconclusive about the power of prayer (really it’s according to the source that is consulted), I have faith in God at he will guide us through difficult times.


For the Man with the Erection Lasting More than Four Hours

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For the Man with the Erection Lasting More than Four Hours
by John Hodgen

He’s supposed to call his doctor, but for now he’s the May King with his own Maypole.
He’s hallelujah. He’s glory hole. The world has more women than he can shake a stick
at. The world is his brickbat, no conscience to prick at, all of us Germans he can ich
lieber dich at. He’s Dick and Jane. He’s Citizen Kane. He’s Bob Dole.
He’s Peter the Great. He’s a czar. He’s a clown car with an extra car.
Funiculi, Funicula. He’s an organ donor. He works pro boner. He’s folderol.
He’s fiddlesticks. He’s the light left on at Motel 6. He’s free-for-alls.
He’s Viagra Falls. He’s bangers and mash. He’s balderdash. He’s a wanker.
He’s got his own anchor. He’s whack-a-doodle. King Canoodle. He’s a pirate, Long John
Silver, walking his own plank. He has science to thank. He’s in like Flynn. He’s Gunga Din,
holding his breath, cock of the walk through the valley of the shadow of death. He’s Icarus,
hickory dickorous, the mouse run up the clock. He’s shock and awe. He’s Arkansas.
He’s the package, the deal, the Good Housekeeping Seal. He’s Johnson and Johnson.
He’s a god now, the talk of the town. He’s got no place to go but down.

John Hodgen lives in Shrewbury, MA, holds a Master’s Degree in English from Assumption College, and teaches at Mount Wachusett Community College and the Worcester Art Museum. He is the author of In My Father’s House (winner of the 1993 Bluestem Award from Emporia State University in Kansas) and Bread Without Sorrow.

He has won the Grolier Prize for Poetry, an Arvon Foundation Award, the Yankee Magazine Award for Poetry, first prize in the Red Brick Review poetry competition, and a Massachusetts Cultural Council Finalist Award in Poetry in 2000. Several of his poems have been nominated for The Pushcart Prize, and he was one of five finalists in the Massachusetts Artists Foundation Fellowship Program. He was a finalist in Houghton Mifflin’s New Poetry Series, Cleveland State University’s Poetry Center Prize, Carnegie Mellon University’s Poetry Series, and Northeastern University’s Samuel French Morse Poetry Award.

John’s work has been included in the anthologies Witness and Wait: Thirteen Poets From New England and Something Understood; We Teach Them All: Teachers Writing About Diversity; and Bone Cages.

I had hope to publish the Auburn University Fight Song as my poem today to celebrate their BCS Championship; however, Auburn lost in a nail biter to FSU. Even so, I had stumbled across the poem above and just loved it. It has a certain Cole Porter song feel to it (think of “You’re the Top”). I hope you enjoy it too.


Snow Day

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Technically, we aren’t getting a snow day here in Alabama because if there was snow, it came in the middle of the night in the form of flurries and none of it accumulated. However, we are getting the day out of school because of extremely cold (at least for Alabama) temperatures and icy roads. Since we rarely have these conditions, it is advisable that people only get on the roads if it is absolutely necessary. I will not be getting on the roads today. The school is closed and since we are expecting even colder temperatures tomorrow, with a possible windchill of below 0 degrees, we may not have school tomorrow either (I’m keeping my fingers crossed).

Instead of going out, I actually have a lot I need to get done today. I need to do some laundry, especially some of my summer clothes. Summer clothes? You ask. Yes, summer clothes. I will be needing them next week. I’m going on a seven day cruise to Honduras, Belize, and Mexico. Because I’m a poor teacher, I would not normally be going on a cruise; however, a close friend of mine and her family are going and they invited me. Since there was an odd number of them and my friend’s sister would have a room to herself and it was a mere $100 to add another person, they asked if I wanted to go. I hesitated at first because of finances, because I really didn’t have even $100 to spare. They said that if I would go, they’d take care of the $100 and the cruise would be free. Honestly, how could I pass it up? So I didn’t. I’ve saved up some money and receive some at Christmas to help pay for the incidentals (HRH’s healthcare costs have cut into that), but all in all, I think I will be okay. From what I have been told, there are three main extra costs to going on a cruise: 1) the excursions at the various ports, 2) alcoholic beverages, which I expect to consume copious amounts, and 3) souvenirs. I hope I have enough to cover these.

Anyway, there’s a lot to do to get ready before I leave. First of all, I need to get packed and make sure I don’t forget anything. Second, having a substitute for a week at school is more work than being there. Luckily, I have it worked out that I have reached a particular part in my curriculum for each of my classes to be able to show a movie in nearly all of them, and if I can be creative then I will be able to find a movie for all of them. However, in my class, watching a movie is never enough. Assignments have to be made for follow ups. I will have worksheets and essays for students to work on when the movies have finished. Third, I need to schedule blog posts for each day I will be at sea. Next week will probably be a few itinerary items, mixed in with some of my usual posts, but I’m sure most of it will be cruise or travel related. I have some ideas, so I hope that even though I will be gone and will not be able to respond to comments, you will tune in each day to see what I have in store for you. I promise I will do my best to make it fun. If nothing else, I know you will enjoy the pictures.

So it’s actually a good thing that it’s too cold to do anything today, I have a lot to get started on this week, and all of it will have to be finished by Friday.


How Great Thou Art

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How Great Thou Art

Verse 1:
O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed.

Chorus:
Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.

Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art!

Verse 2:
When through the woods, and forest glades I wander,
And hear the birds sing sweetly in the trees.
When I look down, from lofty mountain grandeur
And see the brook, and feel the gentle breeze.

Chorus

Verse 3:
And when I think, that God, His Son not sparing;
Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in;
That on the Cross, my burden gladly bearing,
He bled and died to take away my sin.

Chorus

Verse 4:
When Christ shall come, with shout of acclamation,
And take me home, what joy shall fill my heart.
Then I shall bow, in humble adoration,
And then proclaim: “My God, how great Thou art!”

Chorus

“How Great Thou Art” is a Christian hymnbased on a Swedish poem written by Carl Gustav Boberg (1859–1940) in Sweden in 1885. The melody is a Swedish folk song. It was translated into English by British missionary Stuart K. Hine, who also added two original verses of his own composition.

The inspiration for the poem came when Boberg was walking home from church near Kronobäck, Sweden, and listening to church bells. A sudden awe-inspiring storm gripped Boberg’s attention, and then just as suddenly as it had made its violent entrance, it subsided to a peaceful calm which Boberg observed over Mönsterås Bay. According to J. Irving Erickson:

Carl Boberg and some friends were returning home to Mönsterås from Kronobäck, where they had participated in an afternoon service. Nature was at its peak that radiant afternoon. Presently a thundercloud appeared on the horizon, and soon sharp lightning flashed across the sky. Strong winds swept over the meadows and billowing fields of grain. The thunder pealed in loud claps. Then rain came in cool fresh showers. In a little while the storm was over, and a rainbow appeared.

When Boberg arrived home, he opened the window and saw the bay of Mönsterås like a mirror before him… From the woods on the other side of the bay, he heard the song of a thrush…the church bells were tolling in the quiet evening. It was this series of sights, sounds, and experiences that inspired the writing of the song.

According to Boberg’s great-nephew, Bud Boberg, “My dad’s story of its origin was that it was a paraphrase of Psalm 8 and was used in the ‘underground church’ in Sweden in the late 1800s when the Baptists and Mission Friends were persecuted.” The author, Carl Boberg himself gave the following information about the inspiration behind his poem:

“It was that time of year when everything seemed to be in its richest colouring; the birds were singing in trees and everywhere. It was very warm; a thunderstorm appeared on the horizon and soon thunder and lightning. We had to hurry to shelter. But the storm was soon over and the clear sky appeared.

“When I came home I opened my window toward the sea. There evidently had been a funeral and the bells were playing the tune of ‘When eternity’s clock calling my saved soul to its Sabbath rest.’ That evening, I wrote the song, ‘O Store Gud.'”


Moment of Zen: Guys in Sweatpants

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One of the things that I love about cooler weather is the number of guys who wear sweatpants. A really sexy pair of sweatpants worn with the right kind of underwear or none at all leaves little to the imagination, which I find all the better. Of course some of the guys above are obviously in warmer weather than most of us are experiencing. Today and tomorrow will be fairly nice here in Alabama, but Monday and Tuesday the lows are expected in the teens. It makes for a good time to snuggle with a guy in sweatpants and let your hand wonder south of the waistband.

First Resolution Report:

I did three things to mKe myself more assertive this week: 1) I called the vet’s office to get HRH better care since she wasn’t getting better, 2) I sent an email to an online merchant about their poor customer service, and 3) I set up an online profile to try and find some local gay friends. These may not sound like huge steps, but they are things I needed to do or wanted to do, and I didn’t allow myself be be talked out of it by my own self. We will see how these things work out.