Goodbye, Jay


In the early morning hours yesterday, Tray Murphy, who we all knew as Jay on this blog, took his own life. Jay had felt that the problems he was facing were insurmountable. I will not elaborate because I don’t think it’s fair to Jay, but I will never believe that the cause of his problems were real. That being said, I know it caused major problems in Jay’s life. Problems he could not deal with. It broke my heart, and I have shed many tears since I heard the news.

I have known Jay since the beginning of this blog. For over five years, he commented almost everyday. (He always commented on the Blogger version). He even commented on the poetry, which few people ever do. Jay was not only a blog reader but a true friend. I always knew that if I found myself in Virginia, I had a place to stay, and I had a friend who’d welcome me with open arms. Jay was kind and loving. He always had a kind word and was always supportive.

Jay felt at the end that even God had deserted him. I tried to make him understand that God never deserts us. I just pray that God will help his family get through this tragedy.

Though Jay won’t be able to read this, he would want to know that we loved him, cared about him, and he will be missed so very much.

Goodbye, Jay. We love you. We will always miss you.

Peace ❤

About Joe

I began my life in the South and for five years lived as a closeted teacher, but am now making a new life for myself as an oral historian in New England. I think my life will work out the way it was always meant to be. That doesn't mean there won't be ups and downs; that's all part of life. It means I just have to be patient. I feel like October 7, 2015 is my new birthday. It's a beginning filled with great hope. It's a second chance to live my life…not anyone else's. My profile picture is "David and Me," 2001 painting by artist Steve Walker. It happens to be one of my favorite modern gay art pieces. View all posts by Joe

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