Some Days

Anyone who suffers from depression and/or chronic pain, you know that there are good days and bad days. Yesterday was a bad day. The headache pain seems never ending, or at least somedays it does. Lately, it seems that my headache medication is just not as effective anymore. Part of it may be the weather in Vermont has been fluctuating wildly. One day, it will be very warm; the next day, it may be 30 or more degrees cooler; and other days, it’s raining. All of these things affect my headaches. Atmospheric changes wreak havoc on my trigeminal neuralgia. I try not to let the pain get the better of me, but there are times that all I can do is surrender.

Then, there is the depression. Most days, my medication helps. Somedays, it also gets the better of me. Whether it’s worrying about my health or worrying about money, I have days when I feel hopeless and really depressed. Writing about my state of physical and mental health is much easier than telling a friend my problems out loud. It’s never been easy to talk to anyone, even very close friends, about what is bothering me.

I’m hoping today will be a better day. As I went to bed last night, I was seriously considering that I needed to take a mental health day today. Some days, you just can’t push through the pain, whether it’s mental or physical.