May 4, 2014

God Gave Me You

By Joe

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For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.
Jeremiah 29:11-13

A few days ago, I was talking to a friend of mine about God’s plan for us. He had suffered an anxiety attack over some issues going on in his life. I told him that I used to regularly have panic attacks as well. The world would race around me, and I felt that I could not breathe. It was in those time that i thought of my greatest comfort, my mother singing “You Are My Sunshine.” I would begin singing the song, and my panic attack would subside. However, that was only a temporary measure, and the problems were not going away. I took a long hard look at myself and realized that I was nothing without my faith in God. Talking to God had gotten me through the fear and confusion of coming to terms with being gay, and many other issues I have faced in my life. And I realized that I needed to turn to God and depend on him more.

As Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” I told my friend that God has a plan for us. Matthew 7:13-14 says, “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.” We must look and pray to God for guidance if we want to enter through the narrow gate.

This discussion eventually turned to a discussion of if part of God’s plan had been for us to meet and become friends. Without hesitation, I said that it was. I am fortunate for all of my friends and I believe that God had a purpose in bringing those loved ones into my life. Sometimes life can be so difficult and stressful, but when we have faith in God, He has a way to relive that pain and stress. I certainly believe that friends are one of the many, and maybe one of the most important, ways he does this.

“God Gave Me You” is a song written and originally recorded by American contemporary Christian music singer Dave Barnes. Barnes wrote the song after the title came to him while he was walking through London, England. He told Country Weekly that “the lyrics just flowed together with the melody” when he wrote it. Barnes also said that he was inspired by his wife, Annie, who supported him “through all the ups and downs of an artist’s career.” After releasing it, he said that he received mail from fans who said that the song’s message “saved marriages or became a theme for a couple’s relationship.” In 2011, country music singer Blake Shelton covered the song for his album Red River Blue. It was released in July 2011 as the second single from this album. Shelton heard Barnes’ version of the song on a contemporary Christian station, and said that it inspired him to propose to then-girlfriend Miranda Lambert; the music video included footage from Lambert the night before their wedding.

Both Barnes and Shelton use the song to show the love and support their wives have given them, but I think the words are so universal for anyone who is important in your life. I have several people in my life that I am lucky that God gave me, and I hope that you too have someone that God gave you to help you through troubled times and in the good as well. God has a plan for each of us, so ask Him for his guidance in following the right path.

“God Gave Me You”

I’ve been a walking heartache
I’ve made a mess of me
The person that I’ve been lately
Ain’t who I wanna be

But you stay here right beside me
And watch as the storm blows through
And I need you

Cause God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
And for when I think I lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you
Gave me you

There’s more here than what we’re seeing
A divine conspiracy
That you, an angel lovely
Could somehow fall for me
You’ll always be love’s great martyr
And I’ll be the flattered fool
And I need you
Yeah!

God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
And for when I think I lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you

On my own I’m only
Half of what I could be
I can’t do without you
We are stitched together
And what love has tethered
I pray we never undo

Cause God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
And for when I think I lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you, gave me you
He gave me you

Leave a comment | posted in Music, Religion

May 3, 2014

Moment of Zen: Superman

By Joe

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All of my life I’ve had a fascination and love of Superman.

Leave a comment | posted in Moment of Zen

May 2, 2014

Sleepy

By Joe

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Yesterday was a long day, for a number of reasons. There was just a lot to do. I was talking with friend last night and after I mentioned how tired I was, he ordered me to bed. As soon as we quit talking and I got undressed, my head hit the pillow and I was sound asleep. I’m still a bit sleepy this morning.

Also, I got a bit of disappointing news yesterday. Kacey Musgrave and Kip Moore aren’t going to be with Lady Antebellum Saturday but Scotty McCreery an Love and Theft will be with Lady Antebellum. The concert had been moved from a previous date to Saturday and I guess it messed up the schedules of the artists. I really had wanted to see Kacey.

Leave a comment | posted in Uncategorized

May 1, 2014

Do I Sound Gay?

By Joe

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Confession: I’ve always been self-conscious about “sounding gay.” It’s one of the main things that “gives me away” as gay. I knew that my anxiety came from my internalized homophobia telling me: Gay = bad, so sounding gay = bad. A compelling new documentary is bringing together some of the biggest lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) celebrities to discuss a question that probably crosses the mind of every gay man at some point in his life: Do I sound gay?

From director David Thorpe, “Do I Sound Gay?” aims to present an intelligent and and provocative cultural analysis of the “gay voice.” Throughout this process, Thorpe talks to linguists, celebrities, historians, voice coaches and total strangers to share their own thoughts and experiences surrounding the idea of ‘sounding gay.’

In the tradition of funny-but-serious first-person movies like Supersize Me, Roger and Me and Good Hair, Thorpe encounters a colorful cast of linguists, historians, voice coaches, speech therapists, friends, family, and total strangers on the street, gay and non-gay, who share their wisdom and touching, funny stories about the “gay voice.” There are also intimate confessions and hilarious anecdotes from LGBT icons – Margaret Cho, Tim Gunn, Don Lemon, Dan Savage, David Sedaris and George Takei – as they open up about the “gay voice.” Over the course of three years, Thorpe did 165 interviews in four countries.

Here are five reasons. David Thorpe gives for making this film and a few comments from me:

Reason No. 1:

Some gay men are self-conscious about “sounding gay,” even famous ones like David Sedaris. Let’s start hashing out this whole “sounding gay” thing, so we can all be OURSELVES in this small but crucial way. It’s something about me that I’ve come to own and make it my own.

Reason No. 2:

“Sounding gay” is still a trigger for mockery, bullying and violence. LGBT kids are far more likely to commit suicide or drop out of school because they feel unsafe. Zach King, one of our brave young subjects, was viciously assaulted at school. I was always made fun of for my “gay voice,” sometimes I still am, and it has always, even to this day, raises my hackles.

Reason No. 3:

Hard to believe, but nobody has comprehensively explored the phenomenon of “sounding gay.” Voice and sexuality – two fundamental features of human existence, and yet most people don’t have a clue how they’re related. Instead, we have stupid stereotypes. Let’s toss ‘em in the trash. Knowledge is power.

Reason No. 4:

A lot of people think it’s okay to be gay as long as you don’t act – or sound – that way. The daily pressure to cover, hide or “pass” affects many minorities. Let’s relieve the pressure.

Reason No. 5:

Our title isn’t just a title. Combined with our rainbow tongue logo, it’s an empowerment icon, a sneaky, fun, viral way to say it’s OK to sound – and be – gay. When the movie gets made, you’ll see rainbow tongues everywhere, asking, “Do I Sound Gay?”

The film is currently engaged in a Kickstarter campaign in order to fund post-production. Visit the project’s Kickstarter for more information.

Leave a comment | posted in Movie Review, Politics, Pride, Video

April 30, 2014

Sapiosexual

By Joe

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A sapiosexual is one who finds intelligence the most sexually attractive feature.

I want an incisive, inquisitive, insightful, irreverent mind. I want someone for whom philosophical discussion is foreplay. I want someone who sometimes makes me go ouch due to their wit and evil sense of humor. I want someone that I can reach out and touch randomly, and I want that someone to be somebody that I can cuddle with. I have decided all that means that I must be a sapiosexual.

I also want someone that won’t find me boring I have a lot of trivial knowledge in my head and have been described as being very passionate about many topics. Sometimes that knowledge comes pouring out and I want someone who eyes will not glaze over with utter boredom.

Occasionally, I come across a word that just fascinates me. Sapiosexual came from the Urban Dictionary. This particular word seemed to describe me pretty well. The one ing I would add is that I would prefer that other person have a penis. I guess that makes me a “homo” sapiosexual. How many of you would describe yourself as a “homo” sapiosexual.

1 Comment | posted in Word of the Week

April 29, 2014

Follow Your Arrow

By Joe

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“Follow Your Arrow”
Kacey Musgraves

If you save yourself for marriage
You’re a bore
If you don’t save yourself for marriage
You’re a horr…ible person
If you won’t have a drink
Then you’re a prude
But they’ll call you a drunk
As soon as you down the first one

If you can’t lose the weight
Then you’re just fat
But if you lose too much
Then you’re on crack
You’re damned if you do
And you’re damned if you don’t
So you might as well just do
Whatever you want
So

Make lots of noise
Kiss lots of boys
Or kiss lots of girls
If that’s something you’re into
When the straight and narrow
Gets a little too straight
Roll up a joint, or don’t
Just follow your arrow
Wherever it points, yeah
Follow your arrow
Wherever it points

If you don’t go to church
You’ll go to hell
If you’re the first one
On the front row
You’re self-righteous
Son of a-
Can’t win for losing
You’ll just disappoint ’em
Just ’cause you can’t beat ’em
Don’t mean you should join ’em

So make lots of noise
Kiss lots of boys
Or kiss lots of girls
If that’s something you’re into
When the straight and narrow
Gets a little too straight
Roll up a joint, or don’t
Just follow your arrow
Wherever it points, yeah
Follow your arrow
Wherever it points

Say what you think
Love who you love
‘Cause you just get
So many trips ’round the sun
Yeah, you only
Only live once

So make lots of noise
Kiss lots of boys
Or kiss lots of girls
If that’s what you’re into
When the straight and narrow
Gets a little too straight
Roll up a joint, I would
And follow your arrow
Wherever it points, yeah
Follow your arrow
Wherever it points

Sometimes a song really resonates with me, and as I think music should be, it is also beautiful poetry. I came across this song as a free download from my Starbucks app. One listen, and I was hooked. After listening to “Follow Your Arrow” from Musgraves’ Same Trailer Different Park!, the Nashville-based singer-songwriter’s first album for Mercury Records, it’s clear that this is a girl who has something to say. A true language artist, Kacey nimbly spins webs of words to create the quirky puns, shrewd metaphors, and steely ironies that fill the record. She is also the recipient of the 2013 CMA New Artist of the Year award, the 2014 Grammy for Best Country Album and Best Countey Song for “Merry Go ‘Round,” and the 2014 ACM Album of the Year.

On “Follow Your Arrow,” she points out the hypocrisies that society imposes on even the most conservative among us (If you save yourself for marriage you’re a bore/If you don’t save yourself for marriage you’re a horr…ible person) which she balances with a chorus that preaches throwing caution and propriety to the wind: (Make lots of noise/Kiss lots of boys/Or kiss lots of girls if that’s something your into/When the straight and narrow gets a little too straight/Roll up a joint/Or don’t/Follow your arrow wherever it points.) Her message is clear: Be yourself and be happy.

Musgraves’ first two singles, “Merry Go ‘Round” and “Blowin’ Smoke,” struck a chord with country fans because of Musgraves’ outspoken lyrics. Her third single, “Follow Your Arrow,” was released to radio this week and turns the real talk up to ten. In it she discusses a few controversial topics, including one mainstream country rarely — if ever — tackles: homosexuality. “Kiss lots of boys/Or kiss lots of girls if that’s something you’re into,” she sings.

“Well I hope it gets attention because I think it’s definitely time for those issues to be accepted in country music — I mean it’s 2013,” she said. “Regardless of your political beliefs, everybody should be able to love who they want to love and live how they want to live. We’re all driven by the same emotions; we all want to be loved and want to feel the same things. So, hopefully people will put aside their personal, political agenda and just agree with that fact.”

I am particularly excited because I am going to see Kacey Misgrave in concert on Saturday. She will be opening along with Kip Moore for Lady Antebellum. Besides being a fan of Musgrave and being very excited to see her, I am also excited to see Lady Antebellum, because Charles Kelley is one of the sexiest men in country music.

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Leave a comment | posted in Music, Poetry

April 28, 2014

Piano Man

By Joe

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Since last Mondays post was sort of, in the language of Instagram, a “Man Crush Monday” post, I thought I’d do that again. Last Monday, I wrote about my attraction to country boys. I have to say that I really do enjoy country boys, but I also love a man with more sophistication. When I say that, I do not mean in the least that all country boys are uncouth and unsophisticated. While many might be, some of us aren’t. I was raised a country boy in rural south Alabama. Most anything those rough and ready country boys can do, I can do as well. I just happen not to enjoy most of those things. I’ve always loved theater and concerts and well, the arts in general. I love to read and I love to travel and explore new places and learn new things.

My mother always wanted her children to be raised right. She wanted us to have manners and sophistication, at least enough to be comfortable in formal surroundings. She did quite well by me, my sister is another story. Besides knowing which fork to use at dinner and how to be polite and graceful (I’m not always graceful, though it try), mother always believed that there was one important thing that every southern child should learn: how to play the piano. So as the dutiful son, I took piano lessons. My sister did too but did not stick to it as long as I did. I enjoyed playing he piano, but only took lessons for a few years. I wish I had taken lessons longer, but for whatever reason, I didn’t.

However, I have always admired a man who could play the piano. In fact, I find a man who is so nimble with his fingers tickling the ivory that he is surely good with his hands in a number of ways. In the 1999 gay romantic comedy Trick, Gabriel, an office temp by day and aspiring Broadway composer by night, becomes smitten with Mark, a go-go dancer, in a gay bar with whom he makes eye contact. One of the plots of the movie is that Gabriel and Mark spend most of the night looking for a place to be alone. In one scene they go back to Gabriel’s apartment, where Gabriel confesses a secret fantasy of his. He’s always fantasized about getting a blowjob while he plays the piano. It turns out to not be nearly as easy or as sexy when the two characters try to play out this fantasy. Whereas, in the movie it is not anywhere near as sexy as it sounds, I still find it to be a fantasy of mine.

So as the Billy Joel song goes:

Sing us a song you’re the piano man
Sing us a song tonight
Well we’re all in the mood for a melody
And you’ve got us feeling alright

Leave a comment | posted in MCM

April 27, 2014

His Steadfast Love Endures Forever

By Joe

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Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good,
for his steadfast love endures forever.
Give thanks to the God of gods,
for his steadfast love endures forever.
Give thanks to the Lord of lords,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who alone does great wonders,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who by understanding made the heavens,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who spread out the earth above the waters,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who made the great lights,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
the sun to rule over the day,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
the moon and stars to rule over the night,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who struck down the firstborn of Egypt,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
and brought Israel out from among them,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
with a strong hand and an outstretched arm,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who divided the Red Sea in two,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
and made Israel pass through the midst of it,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
but overthrew Pharaoh and his host in the Red Sea,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who led his people through the wilderness,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
to him who struck down great kings,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
and killed mighty kings,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
Sihon, king of the Amorites,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
and Og, king of Bashan,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
and gave their land as a heritage,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
a heritage to Israel his servant,
for his steadfast love endures forever.
It is he who remembered us in our low estate,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
and rescued us from our foes,
for his steadfast love endures forever;
he who gives food to all flesh,
for his steadfast love endures forever.
Give thanks to the God of heaven,
for his steadfast love endures forever.
Psalm 136

No less than 26 times the psalmist reiterates the same combination of words in Psalm 136, “for his steadfast love endures forever.” He reflects on the glory of God, and marvels at the wisdom that stretched out the heavens and flung the great stars in the sky, yet more than anything else is blown away by God’s mercy. He carefully turns the frayed pages of history, only to find each one drenched with the goodness of God.

In the process, he also reminds us that the road to life eternal is not a straight highway lined with shady green trees without any ascends or dips on the way. There will be occasional detours through the wilderness, times when you will be required to swap your frail walking stick for a steely sword and engage in combat with all your might and valor. These are perhaps situations and circumstances that we don’t normally associate with goodness and love. But for the psalmist, every event that came to his mind from the nation’s history affirmed God’s unfailing love to His children.

I believe that the most used trick in Devil’s bag is creating doubt – Self doubt, but more importantly doubt about God’s goodness and His love towards us. We see this constantly with people who call themselves Christians and they teach only hate. They hate the LGBT community, they hate the poor for not working hard enough, they hate anyone who needs God’s steadfast love that endures forever. These people want to place self doubt in our minds so that we think we are not good enough. Only those who they deem spiritually acceptable because they can be scared into larger donations are accepted, but it is the work of the devil that teaches them the hate that they spew to all those that don’t fit their narrow description of Christianity. They don’t want people to believe in God’s steadfast love that endures forever, because if one believes what God teaches us about His love, then we cannot have self doubt.

It was the weak ones who were most attracted to Jesus. Lepers, blind men, sick and the lame formed the regular crowd. It is the people in the margins that Jesus went to and befriended. They had nowhere to go and they knew that all too well. In Jesus’ parable, the righteous Pharisee who prayed long and loud had nothing right. Yet the tax-collector, sinful as he was, went home justified. It is in our weakness that we are closest to God, and when we acknowledge that we are weak, He lends his strong arm and lifts us up. The unknown Psalmist seems to agree: “It is he who remembered us in our low estate, for his steadfast love endures forever.”

Leave a comment | posted in Religion

April 26, 2014

Moment of Zen: Athletic Shorts

By Joe

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As the temperature becomes warmer, men begin to wear shorts out in public more often. I happen to find athletic shorts (and bathing suits/board shorts) very sexy. All of the women I know, find them disgusting. One even calls them “wiener shorts.” But what do women know? It’s gay men who create the aesthetics in this world, and I find athletic shorts aesthetically pleasing and often quite revealing. And lets don’t forget how well they show off a man’s best ass-ets.

Leave a comment | posted in Moment of Zen

April 25, 2014

7 Careers “Christians” May No Longer Hold

By Joe

Though his organization has become notorious for its anti-gay proclamations, American Family Association President Tim Wildmon has sparked the ire of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community once again after sending a bizarre email which claimed that the list of careers that Christians can hold is “shrinking” because of “homosexual aggression.”

Noting that the LGBT community “pro-actively” seeks “opportunities to wreck the personal business and career” of Christians who don’t support same-sex marriage and other rights, Wildmon cited examples of what he described as a “focused effort to ostracize and humiliate faith-based businesses and their owners,” according to Right Wing Watch. The list of careers included photography, counseling, baking and teaching.

Among the cases Wildmon cited in the email, according to the report, was Sweet Cakes by Melissa, the Oregon bakery owned by Aaron and Melissa Klein which sparked controversy after citing their religious beliefs in their decision not to prep a cake for a same-sex couple’s wedding ceremony. Also referenced were Vermont’s Wildflower Inn, which no longer hosts weddings after being fined $30,000 for turning away a same-sex couple, and Washington florist Barronelle Stutzman, who is currently facing a lawsuit from her state’s attorney general after refusing to create floral arrangements for a same-sex couple.

To see the full list of careers that Wildmon implied were off-limits to Christians, click here.

Wildmon’s remarks echo those of his American Family Association co-hort Bryan Fischer, who recently claimed that Christians should “reclaim discrimination” against the LGBT community.

“There are times when discrimination is the right thing to do,” Fischer, who compared the gay community to shoplifters, said at the time. “It is right to discriminate against people who engage in aberrant sexual behavior. We should discriminate against people like that.”

People like Wildmon and Fischer and the so-called “Christians” like him should be banned from these jobs, especially teaching. If you are a teacher and purposely inflict harm, emotionally or physically, then you should not be allowed to teach. A teacher is meant to expand the minds of students, not narrow their minds. It is utterly ridiculous for people like American Family Association and their ilk to be allowed to make perverse statements like these. Why can these people not understand the loving nature of Christianity? These people only strive on ignorance and hate because they feel that it is the only way to control the minds of others.

Leave a comment | posted in Religion