“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
— Proverbs 15:1
In a world that too often meets difference with defensiveness and love with judgment, Proverbs 15:1 offers a quietly radical response: gentleness. The verse does not promise that gentleness will fix injustice or erase cruelty, but it reminds us that the spirit in which we respond matters—not just for those we face, but for the well-being of our own hearts.
For LGBTQ+ Christians, this verse takes on added depth. Many of us know what it feels like to be spoken to with wrath: accusations disguised as theology, rejection delivered in the name of “love,” or outright exclusion from communities that profess to follow Christ. When we are hurt or demeaned, the impulse is understandable: to defend ourselves with sharpness, or to retreat in bitterness.
But gentleness is not weakness. It is not silence in the face of injustice. Rather, it is strength under control. It is the choice to center peace in a conflict-ridden conversation. It is a way of saying, “You cannot define my worth, and I will not let your anger pull me into the same spirit.” In this way, Proverbs 15:1 becomes an act of resistance: refusing to mirror the world’s cruelty, and instead, choosing to reflect Christ’s grace.
When Jesus stood before Pontius Pilate (John 18:33–38), falsely accused and misunderstood, He did not return insult for insult. His responses were thoughtful, calm, and rooted in truth. Like the wisdom in Proverbs 15:1, Jesus demonstrated that we do not have to become harsh to be heard, nor cruel to be courageous.
James offers similar guidance for believers navigating tension and conflict. In James 1:19–20, he says: “Let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger; for human anger does not produce the righteousness of God.” This passage reminds us that our spiritual integrity is shaped not just by what we say, but by how we respond. Slowness to anger is not about complacency—it’s about choosing a response that is Spirit-led rather than ego-driven.
In today’s political climate—where cruelty is often rewarded and marginalized people, especially LGBTQ+ individuals, are targeted for political gain—these verses speak loudly. Many conservative politicians use outrage, dehumanization, and fear to rally their base. The question is not whether we should respond—but how we respond.
These scriptures do not ask us to sit back and do nothing. They call us to resist in a holy way: with clarity, conviction, and compassion.
- Be Bold, Not Belligerent.
Use your voice, but use it with dignity. When someone spreads harmful rhetoric, respond with truth and calm defiance. Gentleness doesn’t mean being a doormat—it means refusing to become what you oppose.
- Channel Anger into Action.
Righteous anger is not sinful—it’s sacred. James warns against reactive, self-centered anger, but the Bible is full of faithful people who got angry for the right reasons. Let your frustration move you to vote, protest, write, donate, organize. Let it be fuel for justice.
- Guard Your Peace.
The world wants to bait you into bitterness. Proverbs reminds us: you don’t have to play that game. Protect your peace by not giving cruelty the last word.
If you’ve been wounded by the Church or by people claiming to speak for God, know this: you are not defined by their wrath. You are held by a God whose first language is love and whose justice is always rooted in mercy.
Today, you may face questions, confrontation, or even condemnation. You may be misjudged or misunderstood. But you have a choice in your response. Let it be seasoned with gentleness—not for their sake alone, but for your own. Let it be a reflection of the Spirit within you. You don’t need to match fire with fire. A gentle word is powerful enough to turn away wrath—and holy enough to protect your peace.
Joe
The Closet Professor 
August 4th, 2025 at 8:51 am
As always, a very fitting Sunday post filled with encouragement and a new way of viewing the words, teachings of the Bible… a reminder that those teachings still apply to us, to me.
I can no longer do the church thing, just not comfortable there. Though that doesn’t mean I have abandoned God, I still seek to worship, exemplify, and to learn… just has to be a means other than through the church.
I have to reconcile Me with Me before I can reconcile things with the church, their teachings and stance, if that is even possible.
I have long held a belief that when it comes to teachings of God, the church is composed of men. Men that are trying to explain the ways of God while they themselves cannot fully comprehend all things about God. So the church is men trying to explain and teach what they cannot fully understand and doing so while trying to adhere to certain acceptable or expected beliefs, standards, within the specific church community. (I’m not sure I wrote that in a way that makes sense).
Thank you for the insights, a new way of viewing things, and encouragement.
August 4th, 2025 at 9:34 am
Thank you so much for your thoughtful and heartfelt comment. I truly appreciate your honesty and the way you expressed your journey with faith—it resonated deeply with me.
While most churches here in Vermont are LGBTQ+ affirming, I’ve found it difficult to attend any church that isn’t part of the Church of Christ tradition I grew up in. At the same time, going alone has always made me anxious. Even when people are warm and welcoming—which is a blessing—I’m naturally shy around those I don’t know, and the attention can feel overwhelming. Church should be a place of peace and comfort, not anxiety. I think often of something my Grandmama once said. She’d been raised Baptist, but when she first walked into my Granddaddy’s Church of Christ, she was overcome by a feeling of being home. She knew, in that moment, it was where she belonged.
Unfortunately, that feeling of home was shaken for me. Not long after the Supreme Court’s decision in Obergefell v. Hodges, legalizing same-sex marriage, the preacher I had long admired gave a sermon that was deeply homophobic. What hurt most was that he twisted scripture—pulling selectively from the Old Testament and using it out of context—to justify his condemnation. I sat there in stunned silence, unable to believe what I was hearing. I wish I had walked out or spoken up, but I was too shocked to act.
The Church of Christ is a New Testament church, rooted in studying the original meaning of scripture. I was always taught that Christ’s teachings fulfilled and transcended the old laws, offering a new covenant built on love, grace, and compassion. By that understanding, homosexuality is not condemned in the teachings of Christ. It was devastating to see someone I trusted preach exclusion in the name of Jesus, who was the very embodiment of inclusion.
So like you, I no longer attend church. But I still hold tightly to my faith. I believe Christ lives in our hearts, and that the Church is not confined to a building—it is within us and among us. Writing these Sunday devotionals is, for me, a kind of church. It’s how I share the good news, encourage others, and keep Christ’s affirming message alive for those who have been hurt or cast aside by institutional religion.
Have you ever seen the film Stigmata (1999)? It’s not a perfect movie by any means, but it includes a compelling idea. The plot references the discovery of the Gospel of Thomas—a real but non-canonical gnostic text, though the film takes artistic liberties. In the movie, Jesus is portrayed as saying that the Kingdom of God is not found in buildings made of stone, but within and around us. Whether or not that line comes from a historically accepted gospel, the message it conveys is powerful and true. God’s presence is not confined to churches—it lives wherever people gather in love, faith, and hope.
If that gathering happens through blog posts and devotionals—through reflections shared from one heart to another—I believe that’s church too. And I’m so grateful you’re here. These Sunday posts have become a meaningful part of how I stay connected to my faith, and knowing they resonate with others like you means more to me than I can say. We may not be sitting in pews, but we’re still worshiping, still seeking, still walking with Christ—just in a different way. And I think that’s more than enough.
August 5th, 2025 at 8:45 am
Long response, Sorry.
Thank you, Joe, for the added words and encouragement.
I have recognized a sense of worship in your Sunday posts, looking forward to your words each week and have started taking time to study some the verses you reference and the thoughts you express.
It didn’t take many weeks before I was settling down with a cup of coffee to read the Sunday posts first thing in the morning, even before morning farm chores.
I’m not sure if I have seen the movie Stigmata or not. The title immediately reminded of something out of Catholicism. When I looked up the movie the storyline seems familiar. So I might have.
Since it looks like something I can stream without additional cost, it’ll be easy enough to watch with your insights in mind.
Always willing to expand my sometimes (rather frequently) limited views.
Farming/ranching in an untouched rural area has some pitfalls for one that has been a loner, shy, quiet, isolated going back to the earliest of memories. I tend to chose when to go town based on whether or not I feel like dealing with people. It also takes a conscious effort to examine my views and explore a greater expansion of those views and experiences, to gains a greater understanding of the views and experiences of others.
I grew up in the mormon church, in rural entirely mormon area. I now live a 650-mile drive (about 11 or 12 hours) from that area, with significantly fewer mormons and an area that is much more rural.
In my days growing up in the LDS Church the teachings were that same sex attraction is unnatural, worldly, sinful. The counsel at that time was that with fervent faith and prayer, immersion in the mormon gospel and serving within the church that those attractions would be lifted.
The counsel of the past was to live a heterosexual life, even marrying a woman and raising a family, despite the attractions or feelings of the contrary.
Obviously I failed as there has never really been a time since Jr High (or maybe before) that the attractions and feelings haven’t been there. There was something different about me early on in grade school, though I didn’t know what it was or understand it.
I guess it could be claimed that the attractions never cleared because I never shared, confessed, that part of me. Honestly, I was scared to. I didn’t know what speaking of that would bring down on me though I knew those attractions and feelings were 1000% unacceptable, so I didn’t dare let anyone know.
In the recent decade the mormon church has shifted to welcoming members of the LGB community, with certain limits (trans still seem to be excluded though I haven’t looked into those church policies). Having same sex attractions is no longer sinful, acting on them is. They have banned conversion therapies and now offer support groups for parents of gay children though lack support groups for gays living in the mormon world. They even allow lesbians and gays to serve in leadership roles, so long has there has never been any gay practices and there be no speaking of such within the church setting.
The counsel today is to live all of the commandments and teachings to the greatest degree possible, even if doing so requires a celibate life.
One would think there would be rejoicement in the newer position and policies.
The old teachings were fine with me because I was deep into the deepest closet that exists. Yeah, at the time of the newer position, newer teachings and policies I knew I was gay but had never actually admitted it to myself let alone to others.
During the transition to the newer stance, however, one of the church higher ups explained things this way, or something like this–
Same sex attraction is an aberration from the correct, godly model, and will eventually be resolved upon completion of our earthly probationary period
I couldn’t accept that, not even from the depths of hiding from and denying what I already knew about me. I whole heartedly rejected the idea that gays, including me, are created with a flaw, a mistake that would need to be corrected or fixed after this life.
That idea just didn’t set well with me.
It was like being told your attractions, a very real part of you, is not your fault it’s a mistake. So I was a mistake?
After that I grew more and more uncomfortable with attending church and my depression and anxiety began worsening. I still kept trying to stay involved within the mormon church though it was a constant struggle. Took a few years before I realized that the incongruence between myself and the mormon church was a driving force in my worsening depression and the anxiousness (have always battled depression and anxiety, but it had worsened significantly). Stepping back from attendance has helped restore some perspective in life and the desire to understand me has grown stronger.
August 7th, 2025 at 12:22 am
Joe
I just found your site. Very nice. My first man love was Jesus. Up over the alter was a picture of him praying. How I prayed for at least a wink or a nod to let me know that I was ok. I walked around the neighborhood preaching about Jesus and my nickname was Pastor. One thing growing up working poor I learned and took to heart was the message of the least of these. Over the years after I left the church that forms the basis of my political philosophy be I a Communist, a pacifist or a anarchist. I have no need for any church today at 78 even though a good friend who was a minister in the Lutheran Church where I went told me at one time, The church needs LGBT people more than they need the church. Very open with views like that in a small town New England 1966. I thank god daily, inviting god to stroll in my gardens, and I pray. I do not understand sometimes how god can take it with so much evil in the world and so many twisting the good words into something evil. Yeah I sing Come by here lord, come by here. Sometimes I think that god is the only solution to the problems we face and a good douse would do human kind good. I wonder sometimes how and if our people are going to turn the other cheek as the fascists in this country come for more of us. So far legal fascism against the trans community and against the immigrant community is the step to the final solution that they are in. What are we going to do when they come for us? Turn our cheek and hope and pray that there really is a heaven? or Fight back. I have to wonder too why are not more liberal churches speaking out? Every one of them should be standing with Rev. Barber. What are they waiting for? They should know history, I certainly know OurStories. Anyway glad to have met your site. Nice to see your pic of the day but there is much more than just the young white boys in the community. I hope to hope that nudes are not the only thing that our artistic community has to offer. I know it isn’t but many folks do not. If you want to see what I do go to my site http://www.furbirdsqueerly.wordpress.com.
P.S I came out in 1966 so I am a oldster. HA!
August 7th, 2025 at 5:34 am
Thank you for your wonderful comment. I’m glad you found my little blog, and I look forward to exploring yours.