The hypocrite with his mouth destroys his neighbor, but through knowledge the righteous will be delivered.

—Proverbs 11:9

I grew up in a very small county church. We only had about a dozen members, though it grew to about two dozen by the time I went to college. I remember that before church started, everyone talked about what had happened during the last week. Sometimes, this was just neighborly news and was good natured, but then there were times when it was just a group of people gossiping about others. Gossip is not something we should spread, though I know that can be very difficult. I admit that I can be a bit of a gossip at times. We probably all can, but I am also sure that we have all been the subject of gossip. Back when I was a teacher at a small private school, there was always gossip about different teachers, students, or their parents, but I was also often the source of gossip because, in a way, my sexuality was an open secret. I never confirmed I was gay except to a select few who I could trust implicitly because if I had been openly gay, I would have lost my job. So, my sexuality was often a source of gossip.

Everyone has experienced the harm of gossip before. Whether the people talking didn’t mean direct harm, the result of gossip is always broken trust and hurt feelings. Gossip can be defined as information about the behavior or personal life of other people, often without the full truth revealed or known. God’s Word warns us to stay away from people who gossip and to guard our words when we speak about others. James 4:11 says, “Do not speak evil of one another, brethren. He who speaks evil of a brother and judges his brother, speaks evil of the law, and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.” Often, people gossip because they are judging others with statements like “Did you hear about so and so? I can’t believe they would do that.” We often hide behind gossip to make ourselves look better or to deflect from our own issues.

I was reading a book by A.J. Truman called Out of My Mind (It’s part of the Browerton University series of m/m romance novels.) In it, one of the characters is Jewish and worries about the gossip at temple. The following passage jumped out to me:

Whispers was what he called temple gossip. Temples and churches claimed that their main purpose was a place of worship. That was only a front. They served as gossip chambers for communities, places where people went to judge and be judged. He had confirmed it with his non-Jewish friends, too. The news floating in between the pews held more importance to congregants than what was being said on stage. It was like gossiping inside a church or temple allowed people to be instantly absolved of their sins.

Proverbs 16:28 says, “A perverse man sows strife, and a whisperer separates the best of friends.” We sometimes think that gossip is harmless, but if we are gossiping, then we are most likely causing harm, especially when the gossip is either untrue or does not tell the whole story. The Bible talks about slander which means making a false spoken statement damaging to a person’s reputation. Slander can destroy someone’s marriage, job, wealth, and family. The tongue has power, and we must be careful with how we use our words. The Bible tells us what words we should speak and which we should not. Proverbs 10:18 provides the following wisdom, “Whoever hides hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool.”

More often than not, when someone spreads gossip about someone’s sexuality, they are judging that person and being unkind. Ephesians 4:29 advises us, “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.” Gossip is usually disguised as a friendly invitation for fellowship but contains a disastrous disease inside. Gossip is like a cancer, spreading like wildfire through gossipers. Have you ever heard a Christian talking bad about someone with the same voice they use to proclaim their Christianity? Their own image becomes tarnished as their gossip poisons the reputation of the one they are gossiping about. This sting of betrayal throws shade on the light of Jesus that is supposed to shine from within us. James 1:26 says, “^If anyone among you thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless.”

Gossip can have widespread consequences. It’s not just a small group that it can harm, but it can harm thousands at once if it is spread in the social media and 24-hour news stations of our current times. And as long as there have been newspapers, there have been gossip columnists, some who purposely ruined other people’s lives. The political world today is full of gossip and hatred. Groups like QAnon spread harmful rumors and conspiracy theories that have no basis in fact or have been taken out of context. Gossip is often giving information without the correct context. All you have to do is what news media like Fox News for just a few minutes to see how quickly they take words out of context and twist them to their own use for spreading hatred and distrust. Conspiracy theories are the worst form of gossip because they can harm to a much wider group of people. Politicians love to gossip or tell half-truths, and we will hear more and more of the lies that are spread through politics. 

While gossip can be entertaining and can seem harmless, it’s not. We may tell one person in confidence, but it will spread from there. Most people can’t help themselves from gossiping, and I know I am one of them. However, I try to do better, and if the people of the world tried to do better, not just with gossiping, but with all aspects of their lives, then we would live in a better and safer world.

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

—Joshua 1:9

Let’s face it, the world can be a scary place. Fear is the main driving force behind many of the world’s problems, and the fear that manifests as hate is the worst kind of fear. In 1 John 4:18, John writes “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.” The LGBTQ+ community faces hate every day. Homophobia has been defined as contempt, prejudice, aversion, hatred, or antipathy, may be based on irrational fear, and may sometimes be related to religious beliefs. While homophobia has been around since antiquity, the term itself has only been around since the 1960s. Just as with homophobia, racism and other negative attitudes often come from fear and insecurity. What makes homophobia and other forms of hate scary for those on the receiving end is that the fear associated with hatred is often illogical.

People with fear that manifests into hate are, in their minds, like a trapped animal who is absolutely desperate to escape and will be ready to fight viciously. Fear and hated are also derived from ignorance. People do not want to understand those who are different from them. They are insecure in their own self-worth and therefore lash out against others. Fear is a powerful thing, but Christ tells us that fear is devoid of faith. However, faith can be strengthened with courage. Psalm 31:24 says, “Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart, All you who hope in the Lord.”

The fourth chapter of the Gospel of Mark tells the story of Jesus teaching near the sea. It contains the Parable of the Sower in which Jesus talks about how the seeds of truth in the gospels will grow in the right hands, but he says in the wrong hands it can grow into hatred. In the Parable of the Sower, Jesus tells of a farmer who sows seed indiscriminately. Some seed falls on the path (wayside) with no soil, some on rocky ground with little soil, some on soil which contains thorns, and some on good soil. In the first case, the seed is taken away; in the second and third soils, the seed fails to produce a crop; but when it falls on good soil, it grows and yields thirty-, sixty-, or a hundred-fold. In Mark 4:15, Jesus says, “And these are the ones by the wayside where the word is sown. When they hear, Satan comes immediately and takes away the word that was sown in their hearts.” When the teachings of Christ are used to harm others, they spread hatred, which causes people to turn away from God, which is exactly what Satan wants.

Later in day, after Jesus taught these parables by the sea, He and His disciples took a boat to cross the sea, but a great storm arose. Jesus is asleep during the storm and seems unworried. In Mark 4:38, his disciples wake him and ask, “Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?” The passage continues in Mark 4-39-40 to say that after they had woken Jesus, “Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, ‘Peace, be still!’ And the wind ceased and there was a great calm. But He said to them, ‘Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?’” Fear is a lack of faith in God. Deuteronomy 31:6 says, “Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the Lord your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.” 

The hate manifested by fear uses religion to cause harm and often drives people away from God. However, if instead of being turned away from religion because of hate, courage and faith can motivate us to combat the hatred that is present in all religions. As God says in Joshua 1:9, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” God gives us hope that we can one day conquer the hatred in the world. The ancient Persian religion of Zoroastrianism believes that at the end of time, the great battle between good and evil will end with the triumph of good. Christianity believes the same thing, but we believe that good wins the battle against evil every day as our faith and love for God grows within us. Our faith and love in God gives us the courage to love others and to work to make the world a better place.

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.

—1 Corinthians 13:4-8

The world does not have as much love as it should. There is far too much hate in this world. Christians make up to 2.38 billion of the worldwide population of about 8 billion people, or about 30 percent of the world’s population. While there are around 10,000 distinct religions in the world, over three-quarters of the global population adheres to one of these four – Christianity (31 percent), Islam (24 percent), Hinduism (15 percent), and Buddhism (7 percent). Love is a universal theme of love found in all religious traditions, Buddhist, Christian, Islam, or others. 

Love is not exclusive to any one religion and is a primary underlying principle found in religions worldwide. The concept of altruistic love challenges the spiritual person to “love your enemies” or to “love without thought of return.” First John 3:11 says, “For this is the message that you heard from the beginning, that we should love one another,” It is a love that flows out to others through compassion, kindness, tenderness, and charitable giving. First John 3:18, “My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.”

Buddhists have a path of compassion, where caring for others becomes the motivating force behind existence. Hindus have a branch of yoga, the heart-centered path, that leads to enlightenment through an overwhelming love for God that takes the form of loving all humanity. Eastern religions, such as Taoism and Confucianism, see transcendent love as essential to true wisdom. Love is a universal theme of love found in all religious traditions. As we realize that all religions have this spiritual principle of love at their core, we can develop a sense of shared humanity. The religious tradition of love should inspire all of us to grow in compassion and love for all people.

When the Pharisees asked Jesus, “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?” (Matthew 22:36), Jesus said to them, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.” (Matthew 22:37-40) Yet, not all those who claim to be Christian follow these two laws. They may claim to follow them, but if you do not love your neighbor, then you do not have a love for God. 

The hatred we see in the world comes from fear compounded by ignorance. First John 4:18 tells us, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.” Fear often comes from misunderstanding and ignorance. It is the unknown that causes many people to be afraid, and fear often manifests itself in hatred. In 2 Timothy 1:7, Paul wrote to his fellow missionary Timothy, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” Those who hate are afraid of equality and love. Love is one of the primary virtues of Christianity along with faith, hope, and charity. 

Love has always been considered central to the Christian faith. It refers both to the nature of God and to the orientation and quality of a Christian. The Bible challenges Jews and Christians with God’s command to love God, other humans, and their own selves. Frist John 4:11-12 says, “Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has seen God at any time. If we love one another, God abides in us, and His love has been perfected in us.” In the three Abrahamic religions (Judaism, Christianity, and Islam), love has always been more than feeling, emotion, and passing sensation. The primary principle of all faiths is to show love and we do this by helping others. James 2:17 says, “Faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless.”

The problem with the phrase “hate the sin, love the sinner” is the interpretation of sin. It is often said to the LGBTQ+ community to justify their claim to love us yet they pass laws and judgement that show their hatred for us. At the heart of sexual orientation is love. Who we love that is the only thing that should distinguish people who are straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, any other of a myriad of sexualities, and it is loving ourselves that allows a person to accept themselves as transgender or queer. Those who are taught hatred or are the victims of hatred because of a particular faith, especially when done by people who claim to love us, causes many LGBTQ+ individuals to turn away from religion. We are taught to hate ourselves, and that hatred comes from fear. Whether that is fear of losing our family, being ostracized by our community, facing ridicule and shame for who we are, it all stems from people who do not have love in their hearts, and if they do not have love in their hearts, then they do not and cannot love God because it is hatred and fear that separates them from God’s love.

We cannot return that hatred as retribution. In Matthew 5:38-40, Jesus says, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.” Jesus goes on to say in Matthew 5:43-44, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” I remember back in graduate school the hate group that call themselves Westboro Baptist Church came to my campus to protest and shout obscenities to those who they deemed unworthy of God’s love. A lot of people on campus staged a counter protest and engaged with these hateful people. I always felt that there was only one response to hate groups like Westboro Baptist Church, and that is to kneel and pray that God would deliver them from evil and show them the ways of His love. So, as I passed by, I stopped and said a prayer asking God to show them the light of his love. In my opinion, the best way to combat hatred is through love. If we show our love to those who hate us, then we are living by example, and isn’t that what Christianity is about? We are supposed to live by the example that Jesus set forth for us when he walked the earth. I have often seen the picture below of a gay man holding up a sign that says, “Jesus hung out with 12 guys and a prostitutes. He was more like me than you.” I’ve always loved that thought, because Jesus did live the way he wanted us to live.

The truthful lip shall be established forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment.

—Proverbs 12:19

Over the years, I have had to deal with unscrupulous and disingenuous individuals, deceitful business practices, and those who attempt scam us for their personal gain. Other than losing someone you love, I think it’s one of the hardest things in life. Sometimes, we are able to see through the lies immediately and can do something about it.

Politicians lie to us every day, just look at a certain former president of the United States who lost an election by millions of votes, yet he continues to claim that the more than 7 millions of votes he lost by are fraudulent. Many in his party even support this lie. We all know that politicians are going to lie to get elected. I am skeptical of all politicians, because I don’t think any of them are completely honest all the time. However, we are able to vote against the ones who tell the most grievous and/or dangerous lies.

The internet has become a major source of modern day lies. We all get spammed by emails everyday phishing for our information and attempting to defraud us. Usually, spam emails are easy to spot and be marked as spam, and most email programs will even attempt to filter out spam messages. If you use dating apps, there are so many scammers, and you constantly have to look scrupulously at people on dating apps to see the signs of a scammer. Social media is constantly full of lies and misleading information. We have to be vigilant against such falsehoods and scams, but again, we can usually avoid these lies by paying attention to what we read.

But the lies that harm us on a personal level are the hardest to deal with. I think the most harmful is probably when loved ones lie to you, especially when your partner cheats on you. Luckily, I have never had to deal with that, but I’ve also had few long term relationships in my life. What can also be the most disheartening is when we trust someone in our lives maybe it’s someone you hired to work with you who turns out to not to be the person they led you to believe they were, or it’s someone you conduct business with that you find have lied to you.

John 8:31-32 says, “So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, ‘If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.’” Sadly though, while the “truth will set you free,” it’s not something that comes quickly, and sometimes, it comes at great cost. There is a expression that may originate in a book written by Anthony Weldon in 1651, The Court and Character of King James: “The Italians having a Proverb, ‘He that deceives me once, it’s his fault; but if twice, it’s my fault.’” In other words, we have to learn from our mistakes.

None of us want to go through life constantly worried that someone is deceiving us. I haven’t often been in the position of being in the hiring decision process, though it’s become more frequent in the last several years. The first several times I was part of the hiring process, did not turn out well as I’d hoped. I misjudged the people. With one, the top job candidates was discovered to be a nightmare to work with before they were hired, and another one fooled me completely, and I’ve regretted trusting that the person was being genuine. They turned out to be the opposite of what they seemed. Now, I feel like I’ve lost my confidence in deciding on who is genuinely honest and who is good at playing a part by telling us what we want to hear.

The other lie I’m dealing with at the moment is because I trusted someone in an oral agreement, when I should have had it written on paper to have the proof I needed. I worked for an attorney for years, and I should have known not to take someone’s word for something but to make sure I got it in writing. In my defense, I was in an exceedingly difficult situation, and I felt trusting this person was my only option. Now, I feel like an idiot.

I don’t want to go through life never being able to trust anyone, but I’ve learned too many times, and to my detriment, that just because I’m an honest person, not everyone else is. Thankfully, I do have some very genuine people in my life that I can always count on to be honest and supportive. They are the ones who I believe were heaven sent.

I just pray that the world at large will one day be a more honest place. Sadly, I doubt it ever will be, but we can do something about it. Just as we can live our lives as model Christians, we can also make sure that we are also truth tellers. We may not always receive honesty in return, but if we are truthful, the truth will set us free. That freedom may only come in the next life, but if we live our lives by the Golden Rule, “whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them” (Matthew 7:12), our reward will be greater than anything that we can experience on this earth.

For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

—Romans 8:38-39

Romans 8:38-39 are verses that every true Christian, especially LGBTQ+ Christians, should keep in their hearts. This is especially true of those that f us who were grew up in conservative and unwelcoming churches. When churches are unwelcoming, they drive people away when they should be opening their arms to all people, no matter their sexuality or race or any other defining characteristic that some people who call themselves Christians claim separate us from fellowship with God.

Oh, many of those same Christians will say, “Hate the sin, but love the sinner,” but those words mean nothing. It is still a hateful rejection because they are passing judgment when only God can pass judgment. In Matthew 7:1-2, Jesus says, “Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.” James in James 4:12 says, “There is one Lawgiver, who is able to save and to destroy. Who are you to judge another?”

God clearly tells us that man cannot and should not judge us by their own rules, and likewise, those man-made rules “nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God.” People may try to separate us from God’s love and try to make us believe that we are not worthy of God’s love, but nothing can separate us from God’s love.

Too many LGBTQ+ Christians have been driven from churches, have had hate shouted at them, or laws passed against them by people claiming to be doing God’s work while they are doing the opposite. When hate in any form becomes the defining character of a person or a church, they have not separated us from God, but they’ve have separated themselves from God.

Remember, nothing anyone says or does can separate us from God’s love. His love is as everlasting and unwavering as our love of God should be.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

—1 Corinthians 13:7

First Corinthians 13, sometimes called the Love Chapter, has become one of the most famous chapters in the Bible. Since the Bible tells us that God is love (1 John 4:8), it is fitting that this beautiful description of love should be well-known. The apostle Paul used the word love nine times in this short chapter and colorfully and powerfully illustrated what it is and is not.

1 Corinthians 13

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood. So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Paul used the Greek word agape, one of several Greek words that can be translated love. Agape in the New Testament is used to describe the deep, constant, unselfish love that is God’s very nature. Agape is God’s love often described as “unconditional love” by Christians. It is unconditional in the sense that it does not depend on the one being loved, but on the commitment of the one who is loving. Love that is passive is not the most important kind of love, but it is the active love that we give others that is more powerful and true in God’s eyes.

Paul uses fourteen active verbs to describe love. Seven are positive statements about what love does, and the other seven are negative statements about what love does not do. In all cases, true Christian love is about setting one’s self aside for the good of other. Lack of love was at the heart of nearly all the problems Paul had confronted in his letter to the Corinthians.

Love is patient and kind. It actively waits and actively moves for the good of others. On the other hand, love doesn’t envy or boast, not even regarding the spiritual gifts of one’s self or others. Love is not arrogant, convinced of one’s superiority over others. Love is not rude, meaning that it does not act indecently, sinning, and breaking cultural norms to bring attention to one’s self.

Those who love like this have given up on seeking their own status and satisfaction first and foremost. Instead, they genuinely commit themselves to seeking good for others. Because of that, they don’t get irritable or provoked when other people get in their way. The other people are the point, not the obstacle. Love also means truly letting go of past hurts instead of storing them up and keeping a record or wrongs.

Love refuses to take any joy or pleasure from wrongdoing. Instead, it declares that which is true, and is worth celebrating above all. Love loves the truth. Love doesn’t set limits on love. Love does not declare, “This far and no further.” Love bears, or puts up with, all things for the good of other believers. That is true even if that means loving from a greater distance to avoid the active abuse of others. Just because a church may reject LGBTQ+ people does not mean that God does not love us, but that those who call themselves Christian but reject others are not doing God’s will. They are actively working against God, and sometimes we have to find other ways to worship and love God. We do that by actively loving others and not dwelling on rejection, because no true Christian would reject anyone.

Love believes all things, pushing the burden of truthfulness onto others instead of carrying the burden of uncovering falsehood. By rejecting someone and making love conditional, we are not showing love but hatred. Love doesn’t stop hoping for other believers to do good, no matter the evidence of the past. Just because many churches preach hate, does not mean that we can stop loving and worshipping God because others make us feel unwanted, but it means remaining faithful to God’s love against all odds. Love doesn’t quit when the trials of life pile up. Love keeps going.

God is love. God in His love wants us to welcome His love and guidance. Paul begins 1 Corinthians 13 by describing just how useless, even destructive, spiritual gifts are when not applied from the standpoint of love. He tells us that it doesn’t matter how pious we appear or how we display our spiritual gifts are worthless if not used as intended by God, out of a heart of love for Him and others. Even the most extreme selfless acts, such as selling everything to give to the poor and becoming a martyr in the name of God, gains a person nothing if not given in love. We can show all the things we do for others, but if it is not given in unconditional love, then it means nothing.

Paul sums it up: Love never fails. Christians may fail to love, as the Corinthians had demonstrated and many modern Christians do today, but God’s kind of love will always be effective and will last forever.

Historical Note about the Celebration of Love:

Wednesday is Valentine’s Day, and love is in the air. Saint Valentine is the name of one or two legendary Christian martyrs. Valentine was a popular name in ancient Rome, and there are at least 50 stories of different saints by that name. But the earliest surviving accounts of the two February 14 Valentines, written starting in the 500s, have a lot in common. Both were imprisoned for performing secret weddings and said to have healed a child during their captivity which led to the whole household’s conversion to Christianity. Both Saint Valentines were said to be executed on February 14 around the year 270 and buried along the same highway.

However, neither story mentions romance. In fact, Valentine’s Day only became associated with love in the late Middle Ages, thanks to the English poet Geoffrey Chaucer. No record exists of romantic celebrations on Valentine’s Day prior to a poem Chaucer wrote around 1375.

In his work “Parliament of Foules,” he links a tradition of courtly love with the celebration of St. Valentine’s feast day–an association that didn’t exist until after his poem received widespread attention. The poem refers to February 14 as the day birds, as well as humans, come together to find a mate.

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. 

—James 1:5

Each time I pray, I have always asked God to guide me because few of us, if any, know our purpose in life. We make decisions every day. It could be to decide a minor thing like whether we should text him back, or as momentous as whether we take a job and move our life to a place where no one knows our name. Do we take that step into the unknown. James 1:5 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”

Sometimes, the decisions we make in life affect us for the rest of our lives; sometimes, they affect us only in the short term. As an LGBTQ+ person, one of our biggest decisions is when to come out to whom to tell our truth. Often, we do this with fear. Even though we might, we never know how someone will react. Will they love me as they always have? Will they look at me differently, good or bad? Will we see disgust and hatred in their eyes? Will they see compassion for the struggles we have endured to reach the decision to tell them this most significant part of our life?

John 16:33 tells us that “These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”  Jesus faced many difficulties on this earth, but he endured them for us. We, too, will face many difficulties, but with God’s guidance we can overcome those difficulties. Matthew 7:13-14 are verses that I think of often when making decisions, ““Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.” It always reminds me to the Robert Frost poem “The Road Not Taken.” The poem is one that is familiar to many of us:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

When we make decisions in life, we have to trust that God will guide us in the right direction. James 4:10 says, “Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.” There may be times when we will be devastated by our decisions, but even in those times, we learn something about ourselves. We will make mistakes. Romans 3:23 tells us, “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” But he will lift us back up if we ask and follow his guidance.

Just like when we come out and we are being our true selves, John 4:24 lets us know, “God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.” We have to live our truth and trust that God will be our guide.

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.

—Matthew 7:7-8

Have you ever had a time in your life when money was tight, and you wondered how you were going to make it to your next payday if you even had one on the horizon? Or maybe you or someone you loved had a health scare? At times in our lives, we all ask God for help. Matthew 7:7-8 should give all of us hope. But to be honest, while God has a plan for each of us, sometimes we don’t get what we want. I was always taught that when you ask for things in prayer, sometimes God’s answer is no. I think it’s more about asking for spiritual wealth or spiritual health, although spirituality won’t feed you when you’re hungry. Matthew 7:9-11 says, “Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent?If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!” Then, Matthew 7:12 says the most important part of this passage, “Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”

In economics, there is a concept of “There is no such thing as a free lunch,” sometimes known by its acronym of TINSTAAFL. When I taught social studies at a high school, I had to teach economics. I hated it and barely understood it myself, but this was one of the concepts I understood. We get what we put into something, and even when something is free, it comes at a cost, but with God, “everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds.” We also have to remember to treat other people as we want to be treated. Too often, politicians, especially conservatives, don’t think like this. They want to be treated in a way that is opposite of what they do. Christians are sometimes also this way. They have a big fancy church or an over-paid minister, but if you look at how they treat others, they are doing the opposite of God’s work. They are not providing faith, love, charity, and hope, except for maybe people like them, but not those “others” that don’t fit into their idea of a Christian. The Golden Rule is really about equality. We must treat all people as equals, and you can only achieve this if you treat them as you want to be treated (unless you’re a masochist, then maybe not treat others as you want to be treated).

I am sure that most of those reading this blog worry about finances, because let’s face it, unless you’re a multi-millionaire or billionaire, you worry about financial stability. If you don’t worry about finances, then you probably worry about your health. We all have things we worry about, but God does have an answer for us.  Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” In Philippians, Paul reinforces the teachings of Christ, especially those laid out in the Sermon on the Mount and Sermon on the Plain, which are the core of Christ’s teachings. Matthew 7:7-12, which is part of the Sermon on the Mount, he tells us to ask God for help when we need it, and we will receive help.

If we continue the passage above from Paul’s letter to the church at Philippi, Philippians 4:8-9 says, “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you.” We can have peace of mind if we follow Christ’s teachings and treat others as we want to be treated.

We have to treat all people the same We can’t help one person and refuse another because we deem them unworthy. All are worthy of equality. Galatians 3:28 says, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” James 1:22-25 tells us to be doers, not hearers. “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was. But he who looks into the perfect law of liberty and continues in it and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer of the work, this one will be blessed in what he does.” So, let us take James’s advice and look into to the mirror. What do you see? Is it the person you want to be, and the person you should be? Are you a doer? Do you live a life that is an example to others? If not, then we need to reevaluate the way we live and not be someone who “forgets what kind” of person we are. We need to uphold the “law of liberty and continues in it.” Because if we do, we can make the world a better place.

I have no doubt that we all have our prejudices. Even within the LGBTQ+ community, prejudices make themselves known. Do you give someone a chance if you don’t find them attractive enough? Do you dismiss a potential partner because they are of a different race? Do you scoff at someone who is less fashionable? Or someone who is older? Or that someone is bisexual? Or overly flamboyant? Every letter of LGBTQ+ has others in the LGBTQ+ community who have prejudices against them. We have too many prejudices, and we must rid ourselves of them. The LGBTQ+ community can be a force of good. We’ve been making the world a better place for millennia. If only because of the art created by LGBTQ+ individuals, we have long contributed to making the world a better place, while we have often been persecuted. We cannot give up on trying to improve humanity and advocate equality. Let us do better as human beings. Let us be the better person and live a loving life that is an inspiration to others.