Monthly Archives: July 2013

Warning to the Rich

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Come now, you rich, weep and howl for the miseries that are coming upon you. Your riches have rotted and your garments are moth-eaten. Your gold and silver have corroded, and their corrosion will be evidence against you and will eat your flesh like fire. You have laid up treasure in the last days. Behold, the wages of the laborers who mowed your fields, which you kept back by fraud, are crying out against you, and the cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord of hosts. You have lived on the earth in luxury and in self-indulgence. You have fattened your hearts in a day of slaughter. You have condemned and murdered the righteous person. He does not resist you.

James 5:1-6
The greatest commands are to Love God and love your neighbor.  These cannot be separated; they go together and impact each other.  Whatever God blesses us with, He intends for us to share it with others.  If we are blessed with wealth, it is for the purpose of blessing others with our resources.  If we are blessed with talent, we should use that talent to benefit others, If we chose to hoard our wealth or other blessings from God, then God becomes very displeased.
James has already chastised the “rich” of looking down on the poor, and he had rebuked them for the arrogance of making plans without considering what God wants them to do.  James attacks this issue from two different angles at once.  first, the issue of hoarding, which means that we are not sharing God’s blessing with others who need it much more than we do, and second, on the Day of Judgment, all things with be made right, justice will be done regarding all inequities.  By not sharing God’s blessings, this is interpreted as pure defiance towards God.
To me this is saying that those that do not help others, that always worry about themselves, making sure they are taken care of and treating the ones that are ‘below them’ with hatred, harshness, callousness, and like they are trash.  They try there best to cheat people so they won’t have to pay the full price for what they truly deserve.  Like they are nothing and not worth the time.  They hired them so they should pay them fully.  They are defying God’s wishes.
James is not just speaking of monetary wealth but also the wealth of God’s blessing.  There are also those Christians who look down on LGBT Christians, not making sure that LGBT Christians are met with loving embrace within the church and instead treating   LGBT Christians like they are ‘below them’ with hatred, harshness, callousness, and like we are trash, undeserving of God’s love because we love someone of the same sex.  Christians who reject other Christians for whatever reason believe themselves to be rich in God’s love, but they are hoarding God’s love all for themselves.
Christians should stop hoarding God’s blessings and start giving it to some that need it, such as charities, children’s hospitals, etc.  When we die, none of this will go with us, and we will be judged on the things we did, or did not do, while on this earth.  Only God’s record of our good works and faith in his love will follow us to the afterlife.

Moment of Zen: HRH

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With my headaches these last few days, my moments of Zen have all included my cat, HRH. She is a wonderful companion who knows how to comfort me in my time of pain. There are few things as comfortable as cuddling with a kitty, unless it it cuddling with a cute guy like in these photos.

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All photos in this post are from Cute Boys with Cats20130719-224906.jpg


Pain

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I tend to have a high tolerance for pain. Mainly, it’s because I’ve suffered with headaches my entire life. Rarely does a day go by when I don’t have a headache at some point. I’ve learned to deal with it and suffer through the pain. Most of the time a pain reliever helps; sometimes nothing does. I’ve have taken numerous medicines throughout my life to try and prevent having headaches, but nothing has ever been effective. Some have had bad aide effects, such as when a doctor prescribed Elavil (amitriptyline). It gave me night terrors. Another was Ativan (lorazepam) is supposed to be a short term drug; usually its recommended that someone should not for longer than 3-6 months. If used for long periods of time, it causes severe depression. I was a teenager when I took this drug and was on it for over a year. Some of the severe side effects include confusion, depressed mood, thoughts of suicide or hurting yourself;. Not only did it not help my headaches, but it also caused severe depression. Combine the side effects of Ativan and a teenager confused about his sexuality, and you have a dangerous mix. It was during this time that I attempted suicide. I was 16 at the time.

I’m writing this because I was thinking last night of my problems with headaches. Sinus headaches, tension headaches, cluster headaches, and migraines all have afflicted me through my life. What I take for my headaches depends on what type it is. Sometimes nothing helps. Medicine may lessen the pain, but not make it go away. Beginning Wednesday night before I went to bed, my head began to hurt. I took something and went to sleep. I woke with a headache the next morning, and I knew it would be a bad one. It was one of those that hurt all over, especially behind my eyes and the back of my head. This was also a headache that came with nausea, photophobia, phonophobia, and lightheadedness. Thankfully, these types of headaches, which is generally a mixture of migraine and tension headaches, only happen 2-3 days out of a year. However, when they do occur, they are quite incapacitating. I stayed in bed most of the day yesterday and took the strongest pain medicine I had. It barely fazed it.

HRH, my cat, gave me some comfort. She lay beside me and kept patting my head with her paw. After 15 years, she knows when I have a headache. I’m sure there is a mixture of genetic, physical, and psychological reasons for my headaches. I’ve had them for as long as I can remember. Maybe one day, they will either stop or they will find some kind of preventive measure that works. I hope each of you are some of the blessed people who never suffer from headaches, and if you do suffer from headaches, I hope that it is infrequently. I assume that most people who have some type of chronic condition learns to deal with it in the best way they can, as I have learned to deal with my headaches.


EAT! DRINK! BE MARY!: TMI Questions from Sean

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I am not a huge drinker. I am a social drinker more than anything, but my friends tend to consume two or three drinks for each of mine. I especially don’t drink around people who I’m not out to or feel comfortable around because I tend to lose my inhibitions and am a lot gayer. However, when I saw this post from Sean at Just A Jeep Guy, I couldn’t resist adding my two cents. I love these TMI questions when it’s something I can relate to. So here goes:

1. Cocktails at brunch: Bloody Mary or Mimosa? Bloody Mary during cold weather, and Mimosas if it is hot outside. Both are pretty fantastic drinks if made right, but too cheap of a champagne can ruin a Mimosa and its easy to make a bad Bloody Mary if you don’t know what you’re doing.

2. Do you have a favorite food/drink pairing? A good Pinot Grigio with Veal Scallopini (or Scaloppini al Vino) or linguini with clams in a white wine sauce. Of course, you can never go wrong with beer and pizza. Also a favorite is Lazy Magnolia’s (a Mississippi brewery) Southern Pecan Nut Brown Ale with pecan crusted chicken is a great pairing.

3. Beer? Wine? or Cocktails? Why? Beer or Mike’s Hard Lemonade on a hot day hanging out with friends. White wine when it’s a more formal event. Cocktails, particularly a margarita or cape cod when out at a bar, unless I don’t want to spend much money, then it’s Bud Light.

4. Red wine or white wine? White wine. I can’t stand red wine.

5. Tell me about the hard stuff. Nothing beats Tito’s Handmade Vodka. It’s a wonderful smooth tasting vodka, and it always gives me lovely dreams.

6. Cigars? No, I’ve tried to smoke them, but I hate them for two reasons: 1) they smell like burning dog shit, and 2) I can’t get the taste out of my mouth the next day.

7. When was the last time you were hungover? Worst hangover? It’s been several months since I’ve had a hangover, but the worst lasted about 3 days. I do my best not to drink enough to have a hangover. It was due to mixing alcohols. I keep with one type of alcohol a night, so that I want get sick. I can’t mix liquor and beer or change the beer I am drinking or drink more than one type of liquor.

8. Best hangover cure. Before I go to bed, I take three-four ibuprofen (depending on how much I had to drink) and a full glass of water. I usually don’t have a hangover if I do this.

9. Craziest/baddest thing you did when you had too much? Did you remember it or did your friends inform you? Make it a fun one! Ok, this might break some illusions some of you have about me, but several years ago, I got really drunk in New Orleans and gave a go-go dancer a blowjob while he was dancing on the bar. I remember it quite well. I am cursed/blessed with remembering everything when I’ve been drinking. It was slutty and a hell of a lot of fun at the time. And yes, I’d do it again if given the chance, lol.

BONUS
Are you a cheap date? How many drinks does it take you get you into bed? Yep, I’m probably a cheap date, especially if tequila is involved. Tequila makes me horny, and I am not one to drink a whole lot, so yeah, I’m a cheap date. If on a date I am unlikely to drink more than two or three drinks. If out with friends, I rarely drink more than the equivalent to a six pack of beer.

So there you have it. My TMI questions about booze.


Travels and Travails

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I had mentioned on Monday that I would blog about my weekend trip. This was not one of my best vacations, but it wasn’t a vacation for me. I was going as the driver. My aunt, who is near my age and, incidentally, my roommate (she’s more like a big sister thank an aunt). Anyway, a few months ago, we got tickets to see Luke Bryan in concert in Birmingham. That was how the plan for this trip started. We were going to take my aunt’s former foster daughter (aka M) to the concert. (My aunt was given custody of her for about two years because the girls parents had major drug problems, but when they got mostly straitened out, the courts gave her back to her parents. My aunt is still a very important part of her life, and they, hopefully, will always be part of each others lives.)

M rarely ever gets to go anywhere or do anything unless my aunt takes her. Sadly since going back with her parents several years ago, she is the grown-up in the household, even though she is 15. So my aunt does her best to make sure she has what she needs and is able to have some sort of a normal life. This is why we were taking her to the concert. She loves Luke Bryan.

There is a fair amount of backstory to this trip, so stay with me.

Add to this that my aunt is a big fan of “Duck Dynasty” on A&E, especially of Jace Roberts. The shows funny, but I don’t get her obsession. Anyway, Jace was scheduled to be in Huntsville at a hunting and fishing expo Friday. Since we were going to be in Birmingham on Thursday and Huntsville is only an hour and a half to two hours away, my aunt wanted to go see him. So a trip to Huntsville was added on to the Thursday night concert.

Well, Huntsville is only two hours from Nashville. My aunt has wanted to go back to Nashville, and it was an opportunity to take M on a short vacation to a place her parents would never take her, so two days in Nashville were added to the trip. My aunt took me to Nashville when I was a kid, so I was game to go back. We had not gone to the Parthenon when we had gone before, and this was somewhere I wanted to go. Also, the Country Music Hall of Fame had moved to a new home and it would also be nice to tour.

To say the least, M was extremely excited about going, and even though I didn’t have the money to go, my aunt convinced me that it would cost very little. She was paying for the hotels and gas, if I would drive. All I had to pay for was food (and we were planning on picnicking as much as possible) and admission to museums that we went to visit (they were relatively inexpensive). I figured I could afford this. However, some unexpected expenses came up, and my money was gone. Since I am a teacher who makes very little money, and in January 2013, I lost my second job that supplemented my income, I am struggling financially. Being poor sucks. In this current economy, keeping one job is hard enough, finding a second is nearly impossible. So when something unexpected comes up, it can be a big problem. It seems like, I can no longer keep my head above water. My “guardian accountant,” and he know who he is, says that it will take time for things to get better. I hope that’s true. Anyway, I’m off topic. With M’s excitement, I couldn’t back out and disappoint her, I would just have to make the best of it.

I knew things were not going to be good when a deposit I made into my account did not post like it should have. Next, I got a speeding ticket going through Montgomery on the way to the concert. I don’t understand how, since my cruise control was set on 65 mph, the speed limit, and the state trooper, aka officer asshole, said he clocked me going 85 mph in a 65 mph speed zone. What he clocked was the gray Ford Fusion that was passing me, or one of the other dozens of cars passing me, instead of my gray Ford Focus. I tried to explain this to him, but he called me a liar. I made the mistake of putting on my brakes and trying to move over when I saw an emergency vehicle (just as the law in Alabama says to do). Now add to no money, I now have a speeding ticket to pay for. Things were not starting out well.

The concert was outdoors at the Oak Mountain Amphitheater, and it was hotter than Hell, as Alabama summers are wont to be. Florida-Georgia Line performed first, and were not very good in concert. Thompson Square, however, was far better than I had expected. Luke Bryan was smokin’ hot, a lot of fun to watch, and put on a great concert. So that was at least one thing that went well.

On to Huntsville. First let me say, I am not big on hunting and fishing expos, so I was not looking forward to this. We waited over an hour to get in and then the line to see Jace Robertson was quite long and he was not even going to start sign autographs for two more hours. I left M and my aunt in line while I went to to check out the expo. Compared to the Buckmasters Expo in Montgomery, where I have taken my niece several times to see the guys from Swamp People (she’s 5, and it’s her favorite show), the fishing and hunting expo in Huntsville was pretty crappy. I was able to go around the whole thing four times in two hours. After which I decided to take a seat and wait to hear Jace’s seminar. I knew it would be partly about hunting and partly about his faith. The Robertsons are members of the Churches of Christ, most of them are ordained ministers. I figured it would be an I greeting talk, and I got a fantastic seat. My aunt and M got their autographs and came over to where I was. Since my aunt is such a big fan of Jace, I gave her my seat and took M to show her around the Expo.

Once all of that was over with, we headed to Nashville. Apparently, the reviews of our Nashville hotel were all lies. The place was comfortable, but it sat behind a liquor store and there was a big ugly black drag queen screaming in the parking lot. First appearances what they are, the hotel didn’t turn out so badly. We had a pretty good day in Nashville, and things started looking up. We went to Music Row, the Country Music Hall of Fame, saw the Parthenon and Centennial Park, then went to the Opry Mills Mall that used to be Opryland. We had planned on touring the Opryland Hotel, but they now charge $20 for parking, so we opted out of that. At Opry Mills, we ate at the Aquarium Restaurant, which has great food and great atmosphere. I had eaten at one in Houston before. M loved it. It was like going to an aquarium and a nice restaurant all in one for her. Two things she’s never gotten to do before. It was a trip of firsts for her.

On the way home on Sunday, we had to more stops we decided to make, because we would be driving by them and since M had never seen them, it seemed like a good idea. The first stop was the Ave Maria Grotto in Cullman, Alabama. Known as “Jerusalem in Miniature,” Ave Maria Grotto is a beautifully landscaped, four-acre park designed to provide a natural setting for the 125 miniature reproductions of some of the most famous historic buildings and shrines of the world. The masterpieces of stone and concrete are the lifetime work of Brother Joseph Zoettl, a Benedictine monk of St. Bernard Abbey. Begun as a hobby, with various materials he could find, and infinite patience and a remarkable sense of symmetry and proportion, Brother Joseph re-created some of the greatest edifices of all time. It is definitely something that if you have the chance, you should see, even if it is like a little tacky roadside attraction.

The next stop was in Birmingham at the Vulcan. The Vulcan statue is the largest cast iron statue in the world, and is the city symbol of Birmingham, Alabama, reflecting its roots in the iron and steel industry. The 56-foot tall statue depicts the Roman god Vulcan, god of the fire and forge. I had not seen the statue up close in years. Since I had last seen it, the statue had been restored to its original condition. The restoration and the new visitors center are really nice.

With the exception of the lack of funds and the speeding ticket, the trip actually turned out to be very nice. The only thing I regret, and I just didn’t have the finances for it, was that I would have loved to enjoy some of e famous nightlife in Nashville. Oh well, that will have to be for another trip.


Excelsior

NYC Construction Workers

Excelsior
by Walt Whitman

Who has gone farthest? for I would go farther,
And who has been just? for I would be the most just person of the
earth,
And who most cautious? for I would be more cautious,
And who has been happiest? O I think it is I–I think no one was ever
happier than I,
And who has lavish’d all? for I lavish constantly the best I have,
And who proudest? for I think I have reason to be the proudest son
alive–for I am the son of the brawny and tall-topt city,
And who has been bold and true? for I would be the boldest and truest
being of the universe,
And who benevolent? for I would show more benevolence than all the
rest,
And who has receiv’d the love of the most friends? for I know what it
is to receive the passionate love of many friends,
And who possesses a perfect and enamour’d body? for I do not believe
any one possesses a more perfect or enamour’d body than mine,
And who thinks the amplest thoughts? for I would surround those
thoughts,
And who has made hymns fit for the earth? for I am mad with

About This Poem

Excelsior is a Latin term meaning “ever upward”; it is the official motto of the State of New York. A slightly different version of this poem first appeared as “Poem of the Heart of the Son of Manhattan Island” in the second edition of Leaves of Grass.

Walt Whitman was born in Huntington, New York, on May 31, 1819. He is best known for Leaves of Grass, a prodigious collection of poetry that he continually revised for most of his life. Whitman died in 1892. He is one of America’s most celebrated gay poets.


Bigotry, Biscuits and Gravy: Being Queer Below The Mason-Dixon Line

Interesting post about LGBT identities in the South


Boasting About Tomorrow

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Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”-yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.
James 4:13-17
 
There is so much depth to these five verses. In the big picture, do we include God in all of our plans? Do we include him in our career or educational plans? Do we pray about the path He wants us to take?  When we make plans and exclude God, no matter what the plans are, it is as if we are boasting in our own abilities.
 
Verses 13 and 14 refer to making future plans for prosperity without consulting God. Even if the plans are honorable and righteous, God may have other ideas. Our lives are but a blink of God’s eye, “a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.” God wants us to consult with Him for all plans.
 
I plan ahead.  If I do not have the next step or two thought out before I get to them, I feel behind and unorganized.  However, God does not work this way.  Ever since I gave Him full rights to my life, I cannot seem to plan anything too far in advance.  He is the ultimate schedule shifter.  James notes, “you do not know what tomorrow will bring.”  I have to remind myself of this.  Life throws sudden changes at you.  Yes, I still plan ahead to the best of my ability, but I now make flexible plans instead of rigid ones.  This is one way I submit my life to God, by giving Him free reign to jumble my schedule.  In the end, I trust God has a better idea of what I should do with my life than I do since He sees the entire picture.
 
I remind myself that God has a plan for me in my prayers.  I begin by asking God to forgive me of my sins, then I ask Him to guide me down the path He has chosen for me before asking Him to bless my family and friends.  I pray for guidance down the path God has chosen for me, because I know it is not an easy path.  In Matthew 7:13-14, Jesus says, “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many.  For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.”
 
I’ve learned to use verse 15 in all planning. “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” There is so much each of us wants to do with what time we have left in our lives, right? Personally, I would love to travel to Europe again, write a book, get in better shape, and be healthier. With each thing I want do to, I pray about it and say, “Lord, if it is Your will that I do this, then I will do it.”
 
Psalm 37:4 states: Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. This is a Scripture of hope.  We think, “I love the Lord and so He will give me whatever my heart desires.” That sounds great and all, but what about this:  if we love the Lord and become very close and intimate with Him, very soon His desires become the desire of our hearts. Ask the Lord if your desire is His will and you may find that His will truly becomes your desire.
 
Verses 16-17 remind us that boasting in our arrogance is evil, and goes on to say that if we know the right thing to do and fail to do it, we are sinning.  If the Lord places something upon your heart, and you do something else instead, verse 17 tells us that it is sin.  In 2 Corinthians 1:12, Paul writes, “For our boast is this, the testimony of our conscience, that we behaved in the world with simplicity and godly sincerity, not by earthly wisdom but by the grace of God, and supremely so toward you.
 
Boast in the Lord and proclaim to everyone: “My God has blessed me abundantly, and He directs my path.”  In Matthew 5:6, Jesus said: “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.” There is satisfaction in doing God’s will. To actually do good is filling food. The more we eat the keener our appetite becomes. Dissatisfaction is a sure sign that we are not eagerly doing the will of God. It is a symptom of spiritual immaturity. The only way to discover the point of Christ’s teaching is to practice it. The only way to godly contentment is to hunger and thirst after righteousness.

Moment of Zen: Boat Books

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Who Dat Whodunnit

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Who Dat Whodunnit
continues the Scott Bradley series. No longer a go-go boy in the French Quarter but still involved in an unorthodox relationship even by gay standards, he is now a professional investigator in business with with his two partners. I thought I had this one figured out, but, by the end of the book I found I couldn’t have been more off base. This is yet another great mystery by my favorite author Greg Herren.  Easy reading, great plot development, familiar characters that feel like old friends, so if you’ve read the Scotty Bradley Mysteries, and I suggest you read them in order, you will love this one.  If you are a long-time fan of the New Orleans Saints, like I am, then you will absolutely love this book, which is part homage to the Saints’ Super Bowl victory.

The Saints’ victory in the playoffs and a ticket to the Super Bowl just prior to the start of Carnival season has everyone in New Orleans floating on Cloud Nine. But for Scotty Bradley, Carnival looks like it’s going to be grim yet again when his estranged cousin Jared—who plays for the Saints—becomes the number one suspect in the murder of his girlfriend, dethroned former Miss Louisiana Tara Bourgeouis. Scotty’s not entirely convinced his cousin isn’t the killer, but when he starts digging around into the homophobic beauty queen’s sordid life, he finds that any number of people wanted her dead. With the help of his friends and family, he plunges deeper and deeper into Tara’s tawdry world of sex tapes, fundamentalist fascists, and mind-boggling secrets—secrets some are willing to kill to keep!